I do not have any advice but I wanted to say Congrats AK! Well done!
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Good Job, AK!!!! When you posted that date in your signature you knew you had turned a corner. My best to you, hun.
Re: Telling others...my husband and one or two drinking buddy friends...no one else NEEDs to know. My friends and hubby and son know and count the dates with me....they are supportive and a blessing. I have found no NEED for anyone else to know at this point. KriggenBottom"People usually fail when they are on the verge of success. So give as much care to the end as to the beginning." Lao-Tzu
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Well done on 7 days AK!
I made the mistake of telling a so-called friend that I had a problem a couple of years ago. She only drinks very occasionally. Boy did I ever regret it. She threw it back in my face many times, and because of that we are no longer friends. Annoying thing is that she has a serious food and weight issue and I would NEVER have thrown that back in her face.
Congratulations to you as well Best! You are just doing amazing.I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me
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Bestlife, that is soooo true about it not being so secret! I used to think I was so clever ducking into the kitchen and guzzling half a bottle of wine every half hour or so and then slurring my speech and wobbling around like a bad clown. ugh!
LOL bad clown. that's funny. (sorry my sense of humor is kind of broken...don't mind me)nosce te ipsum
(Know Thyself)
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I haven't told anyone .... not even my husband ... not even about what I'm doing on the computer all the time! I did say I was going to take a break from the wine when he asked my one time why I wasn't having a drink... ("a drink" .... LOL..."a bottle" or 2 was more like it!).
I guess I'm afraid of failure, but I want to get this under control my own way .... by being able to say how I feel here, to people who will really understand the struggle. My husband hardly drinks, so wouldn't understand the mental anguish anyways.
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People who don't have a problem with alcohol rarely understand the mental anguish!! But, I am a pretty open person, and if there is something on my mind, I can't help but talk about it. Hell - if I hadn't told my BF - he would buy wine for me as usual. Of course I had to tell him. But even my kids know about my attempts and struggles. plus my close friends - as drinking wine together is what we do - thus my struggles when on holiday and in the same city with them. And, my running group of course - we are "the drinking club with a running problem" - so when one doesn't drink the beer, there are always questions. This is no secret. They know I get loaded - they may not know what I do at home - but they are most supportive (and appreciate the Designated Driver too!!!) Some of them even make sure the have AF beer for me now!!! It is really quite considerate I think!!!
Not sure - but if you have nobody to tell, or to question you - then why tell. But that is not my way. My going AF and continuing to try as even resulted in some of my friends and family members to admit their own problems and try to change as well - which is a good thing!!!
Peanut
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Hi Alaska,
Looks like the answers range from a few people to the very few. Personally, I told my husband, and he's been a big part of my new life. My girls (20 and 23) also know that Mom doesn't drink much anymore, and if they're home and I'm in the "office" (listening to cd's) they had better leave me alone! But outside the immediate family, I've told no one. No matter how good the friend, the trust just isn't there for something so personal. It was in this respect that I totally understood RJ's wanting to devise her recovery in the privacy of her home and with the anonymity of the internet. Oh, and there's one other that I've shared with - the big guy - the creator of the universe; but then he already knew.
You sound so different from your earliest posts. You can truly tell this is different. Congratulations on all you have accomplished and will continue to do.
Vera-b
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Telling family and friends in stages
AK,
When I 1st joined MWO, I told my husband not long afterward that I wanted to get a handle on my drinking, and I had found an online program. Well I didn't do the MWO program at that point in time, because then I found out I was pregnant. That was Jan. 2006. Fast forward to this past spring, when I hit a real depression, and all of my family and friends knew it. I started to get help (therapy and meds) and started to inch out to a few others (my sister, a few close friends, my mom) about my drinking concerns and MWO. Also continued to talk to hubby. I have found that I need to be connected with my husband to feel grounded and ready for success in most areas of my life. When we are off kilter with each other, nothing else works. It was scary for me to tell a few of my girlfriends, because now I know it's OUT there -- especially when I have not made a lot of progress on the "problem" yet. But no matter how difficult it is, or how much I vascillate, at least I have been honest and opened up, and it has made these friendships stronger. One girlfriend took several hours off work one afternoon so that she could watch my 2 year old son in the waiting room while I saw my doctor -- while I was crying the whole time.
So I understand being reticent to share, but I think if we want to move forward, it's important to know that those who love us know where we are. This does not mean telling everyone at work, or casual acquaintances.
SOrry if that is a long winded answer, but like most of our struggles with AL, it is too a process.
xoxo
CS
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Good post, CS, and good to know where you're at. We are all here for you.My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.
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Telling my husband was an important step for me - owning up to my AL addiction. He has been wonderfully supportive but although he knows about MWO I don't share with him what is said here.... this place is a bit like my private diary:H
It was only after I got many AF days under my belt that I felt confident enough to share with others - I was too worried that they were going to say that I don't really have a problem which would've sent me back to square one.
Great job AK, you're flying now!"The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"
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thats great Arkgirl,
am happy for you, you sobriety is your life, so each an everyone of us has he way of living, we are all on the same journey and everyone is taking his on rout, as long as we all reach the same spot.
the only thing i can tell you is always have someone that you can talk to a close friend who understand you since you cant do it alone, and thats why we are all here.
" keep doing the same thing that kept you sober for the last 24hrs"
best of luck
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