So what's it all about??

[hippie37]

I first came to MWO when I was 2 nearly 3 months sober. I came here originally because i needed another perspective on my drinking to the one I was getting on the AA forum I was participating on. I was continually told to "get to meetings in my area". I went and was told to "Keep coming back"................Back to what? All's I saw was people telling me to keep coming back to the rooms and it would eventually sink in WHY I was there. Sorry but I need some more definition of that statement? So WHY exactly?.....................................Well as you've guessed that answer was not forthcoming.

10 years ago I was told I had a problem (actually 11 now). My first point of call like many in this country was my local alcohol service and then AA. They always say AA is the 4th emergency service....Oh how quaint. Again more terminology that seems to be spouted from the mouths of the AA tambourine bashers. I seriously mean no disrespect to AA members here this is just my own experience and outlook OK?

Recently my outlook changed and not for the better might I add but I tried. For those who remember when I was struggling last summer with that whole 'searching' issue....(don't mean to leave anyone out but Det's post rang in my ears for fucking days).

Anyway I'm digressing from the point I'm trying to make here. The question is: So what's it all about?.

So I come here each day and try to read but mostly I come here to speak to my friends and keep abreast of things. YES it seems false but my friends are not. They would do anything for me. I have been at my rock bottom again recently and those friends (you know who you are) have pm'd me and asked after my welfare. New friends, old friends they have kept me coming back, even after bieng a tit and posting drunk. You have all seen through that and seen the person I am and was when I first came here. So what drives you to come back here each day?

Love Hips
xx:l

[Waiting for his way out]

So what's it all about??

Posting for me is like an interactive diary. The old diaries just took what you gave them, words, words and more words.. this one, the new diary (MWO), talks back. It tells you when you are right and it tells you when you are wrong. It does not always tell you what you want to hear, but often tells you the truth.

[hippie37]

So what's it all about??

Thanks waiting that's what I'm after here. What goes on in your head to make you come here and post etc. Thanks for your input.

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

[tlrgs]

So what's it all about??

to help if possable hippie and yes im doing good for myself and i do have my problems .. and coming here helps me to really understand me and going to AA meetings helps me inforces how i dont want to be anymore .. and just going there to listen ..take what i need and leave the rest.. life is always changing around me now in alot of good and bad ways .. so everything i do helps if not for anyone but just me ..love you buddy

[Cinders]

So what's it all about??

Hippie,

I don't know for sure. I can't really put my finger on it.

Surely the friends I have here.

But today I am feeling very vulnerable. Hubby is flying out of town, I blew it for a couple days last week and feel very down on myself. Broken hearted I hurt my hubby again, too.

Staying here helps me keep my eye on the prize. A happy sober life.

Not there yet, maybe will never get there. But Gosh Darnit, I am NOT going to quit trying.

And I do love seeing others do well, helping others, too. It makes me feel a lot better about myself than just being sober. I can actually share something good in life. Spread it around. Does that make sense?

Love,
Cindi

[hippie37]

So what's it all about??

T I understand what you mean mate. There are things that you can take or leave in AA but admittedly most things are quite rigid. I think it's a strong person that can decipher the shit though and take what they need. Do you ever get slammed for not being 'a part of the program' as it where?

[Lila]

So what's it all about??

That was so beautifully put, 02m. I am sorry if you are having a bad day. Emotions come and go, at least for me, and very dramatically too. I hope tomorrow is better, or even later on today!
I believe that a group has more power than an individual, and sometimes I feel like I 'borrow' power from this site.
Lila

[Seacailin]

So what's it all about??

I keep coming back here Hipp, cuz when I was in the depths of drunken despair and literally stumbled upon this site, you were all there for me. I will never forget my friend "Renewal" and I miss him so much. You did not judge me. You gave me great advice. You gently pushed me to where I needed to be. I feel closer to some of you people than I feel to my own family. I love you guys, and I will keep coming back.

[cymru]

So what's it all about??

great post. I am hear because I feel there are people who truely care here and I'm accepted no matter what. Rather than being told I've done wrong, I am given info and support to help in my recovery. I have friends here who care about me and who I care about.

[Chelle12]

So what's it all about??

Hi Hips,
The reason I come here is to feel at "home".
Im a wino.
I cant drink in front of my son or fiance.. cos I get "The Look".
I come here to read other peoples' experiences.
I come here to learn, to TRY AGAIN tomorrow... even if I fail (which I usually do)
I come here to feel a PART of something... to BE part of a family.

I come here to vent, to cry, to share, to feel, to sympathise, to empathise... and to care.

Love ya mate

Jo

[tlrgs]

So what's it all about??

no not at all hippie and if that would happen ..just walking away and find another meeting and like i say everyone has opinons are like asshole ..we all have them lol

[hippie37]

So what's it all about??

Cinders;447001 wrote: Hippie,

I don't know for sure. I can't really put my finger on it.

Surely the friends I have here.

But today I am feeling very vulnerable. Hubby is flying out of town, I blew it for a couple days last week and feel very down on myself. Broken hearted I hurt my hubby again, too.

Staying here helps me keep my eye on the prize. A happy sober life.

Not there yet, maybe will never get there. But Gosh Darnit, I am NOT going to quit trying.

And I do love seeing others do well, helping others, too. It makes me feel a lot better about myself than just being sober. I can actually share something good in life. Spread it around. Does that make sense?

Love,
Cindi

Cindi.............or should I say db2fromala??? (In a menacing James Bond Accent!!!.) If it weren't for people like you in the first place then YES I would not be here right now. As I said I think these days it's the friends rather than the cause that keeps me coming back. That doesn't mean I'm not trying to put in the work though. i'm used to seeing my close friends posting etc like in the AF thread; But I warm when I see a post my an old friend like you or fickle, Jinja, Star etc..That's why I'm here I guess because I've made such good friendships and I want to keep those running.

Love hips
xx:l

[hippie37]

So what's it all about??

tlrgs;447015 wrote: no not at all hippie and if that would happen ..just walking away and find another meeting and like i say everyone has opinons are like asshole ..we all have them lol

The old jokes are always the best sometimes T!!!lol Saw IAD post a picture to the effect yesterday somewhere!!! Might of actually been in your thread!!!

Cheers mate and thanks for being there.

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

[Guest]

So what's it all about??

I come here because its the only thing that works for me.
Before I found this place I was starved of a safe place to pour my real feelings about myself , my drinking , my dreams..
Since Ive come here , and I was a slow starter , I have found some amazing friends , you been one of them , (I feel it is only lately we have really begun the process of getting to know each other),and I feel loved here and cared for and like I really belong..I really feel like I belong somewhere for the FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE! I LOVE IT AND THROUGH THIS FORUM I WILL SUCCEED ...and yes I am shouting it because it makes me feel so very happy indeed.

[Prest4time]

So what's it all about??

Like Limers said, I too was starved for a safe place to share what was really going on inside of me. I discovered that I wasnt the only woman who struggled with this. Before I found MWO I would look around me in life and ask myself inside, "am I really the only woman who appears normal on the outside but fights this demon??"

I come here because when I have a bad day like I did last week, you guys were right there with so much wisdom and encouragement, and without you, I dont know what I would have done that day.

So for that, thanks. Great post Hippie.