Is moderation a reality

[vealees]

Can we really do this? is there anyone out there who has all but destroyed themselves, Job's,Kidd's and family now drinking in moderation?? I know of only a few in my life who drink without destruction they are focused people who have never been caught in the heartless, revolving door of DAMAGE CONTROL. Damage control has been my plite in life with or without alcohol. To stop drinking to the point that you get your life back and all of the respect that goes along with that and then be able to pore yourself only a couple of drinks at the end of that hard fought day would be a triumph indeed. It would mean that YOU WON! You won over the most terrifying, debilitating chapters in your life... Victory's can be Confusing... Cant they.....

[Guest]

Is moderation a reality

no!

[Starlight Impress Forever]

Is moderation a reality

LMAO limers.

vealees, yes, some people can moderate, but I seriously think them the minority. We all started off hoping that we could learn to control our drinking. But, after many failed attempts.........myself and many others decided that AF was the only option available to us. So, I`m AF for good and I don`t consider I`ve lost in any way. We are all winners, whether successfully moderating or living an AF life........either way........we beat the Beast, after all.

I hope you do make a moderator, but, even if you don`t, you`ll still be a winner........it`s just that you`ll be an AF one.

Star x

[puggles]

Is moderation a reality

Mod.

Hi there Vealees:l

:new:So, I surely hope so........ seem to be able to do that allright, but then the
bingdrinking comes without notice. I am still to establish some triggers. I know it cost me my marriage - mine was very one way from my side though, so you know - I'm better off.
Have no advise other than, I'm never ever giving up! The only way to learn how to walk, is to learn how to fall.......( sorry, I do not know who said that ) I guess it would be parents talking about their children! Keep at it, that is what I'm trying to do so I do not loose my closest family, friends and my job - which I LOVE!!!!!!!!!

Keep well & keep in touch!

[Starlight Impress Forever]

Is moderation a reality

Great attitude, puggles. Nice to meet you.

Star x

[caysea]

Is moderation a reality

Hi All
Like most I thought I could mod.I know I can't.I have bought into the theory that I am wired differently.It will not work with my brain .When I finally accepted this AF became much easier.Someone here that mod told me they can take it or leave it.They weren't looking to get the buzz. I can't comprehend that. That is the only reason I drank to get the buzz which we all know where that leads.Mod or AF only each of us can answer for ourselves.If you do mod please be honest with yourself.

Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08

[brittzak]

Is moderation a reality

If you count all the times I tried to moderate you'd also be counting several times I ended up in a binge! I can not and very few can. ALSO, I think the definiton of what moderation is varies here. It is easier to not drink at all than to try and control the amount.... for me. (Not that it is EASY persay, but it is easier than trying to moderate)

[AAthlete]

Is moderation a reality

To me, if you have not slid too far down into the grasp of alcohol it may be possible. However, if you are like me and once you started drinking your willpower to stop evaporated, then most likely the answer is no.

[KAT20]

Is moderation a reality

Vealees Hello, I tried to moderate forever and at least a year with the help of this site. I have come to the realization that I cannot. I spent awhile moarning the loss but I found I am happier AF. Only you will know if you can. I truely had to admit I was powerless over alcohol. I had a few rare times when I moderated but usually my alcoholic brain took over and way over what I had planned. I know you will find your path if you keep searching and asking for answers. Never give up.

[july232007]

Is moderation a reality

Vealees,

For me no.

July

[A Work in Progress]

Is moderation a reality

For me the problem was not that I would immediately binge if I started drinking again, but that I would gradually creep back up to my previously (WAY too large) daily amounts. I went through that process several times; I felt no control over the progression, and certainly no control over the amount that I would drink each day, once I had gotten back to my own "normal drinking" level.

So it was always somewhat seductive. For the first week, or first few weeks, I would think that I was doing fine... then there would be days I would do "fine," and other days I would drink too much. Then, most days I would drink too much. Finally, I was drinking way too much, just about every day.

I think that a lot of (but not all) people who say they are "trying to mod" are stuck (for years, sometimes) in the place where they are doing "fine" some days, and drinking WAY too much, other days. And I think they worry about it a lot, and try to control it, a lot. That's a place I just do not want to be!

wip

[momof3]

Is moderation a reality

I started to drink at the age of 15 and have attempted to "mod" since. I always thought that I could be in control. I quit several times and started again with moderation as my goal but slowly, the excessive drinking would take hold. It did not happen overnight mind you, but slowly and gradually. Then it would reach the point where I was hiding empty wine bottles in my closet, stuffing them in paper bags, etc. so my husband and children would not see how much I was drinking.

I struggled through so many days of being hungover, feeling like shit, and pretending that I was fine. Deep down I knew that I had no control over my drinking, but the alcohol and the effects it had on my brain would tell me something different. I so wanted to be the "normal" drinker who could sit with friends and chat over 1 or 2 glasses of wine.

I have been AF for almost 7 months now. Prior to quitting, my anxiety level was so high that I could hardly steady my hands, I was nauseous all of the time, and I literally could not think or make every day decisions. I told my husband that if I did not quit, I would surely die. I now have no illusions that I can moderate...but it has taken 30 years for me to reach this understanding. I like being AF. I am becoming a different person and that is both scary and exciting.

[brittzak]

Is moderation a reality

Gosh Momof3, reading your post made me cry! I think so MANY of us can relate to every word.

[Sunbeam]

Is moderation a reality

I think the most successful moderators drink less than once per week. There a few of us around here, not many. I am close to achieving that now, but I have not maintained this over enough time to claim real success. My DrinkTracker record will continue to tell my story, as long as I hang out here.

[Chief]

Is moderation a reality

I believe if you have a problem with alcohol, there is no turning back the clock....so, no, there is no moderating. I'm a firm believer that if you were capable of moderating, you wouldn't be here. We all hope we can transform into a modder when we first get involved in MWO, but how many are true modders?......just my opinion...

Don