Army Thread 26th November

[Seacailin]

Army Thread 26th November

LOL, My sister is waaaayyyy excited too. She bought so much food at the Supermarket that her hubby is making her return some.

[Wish Upon a Star]

Army Thread 26th November

He everyone. Very busy moning for me. First i got locked outta work and had to wake our sous chef up (he lives there) to let me in. Then all the residence came in half an hour early .. I was all ready running late as it was. Had 8 people in for breakfast and they all came in a different time so i felt like i was constantly repeating myself. Then one of the bills got mixed up and caused alot of confusion. Then there was so many emails to catch up on. I did get a bacon sandwich though that was lush!!

Sea .. i'm glad your starting to feel better .. and i can just imagine how excited you must be feeling about your son coming home, 2 years is a long time.

Limers .. sounds like the party is going to be so much fun. Gonna have your hands full there!

Hi to everyone else, how has everyone been this morning?

Well my plans for the rest of the day are quite sad. Was thinking i might visit my grancha's grave today. He died in april and i still haven't been to the grave. Now this is not because i'm a heart less person it's just because i find it very difficult. I'm the same with visiting my dads grave. It upsets me so much. The reason i've been thinking about going there is because i was thinking about my dad last night whilst lying in bed and was telling Cy about his tattos and his funny little ways and it got me thinking of my grancha. I miss him so much so going to see him today if i can face it.

[startingover]

Army Thread 26th November

I know what you mean wishy, I find it hard to visit my dads grave....

[A Work in Progress]

Army Thread 26th November

one2many;478007 wrote: Thanks Guys, guess I have a lot of thinking to do, thanks for your kind words.

Thinking... OK, yes... but as we are all saying: talking about it, too. I hope you will reach out to someone you feel comfortable with, someone whose program you respect, and talk with him or her about your struggle.

The problem with just "thinking" about it, by yourself, is that it becomes a battleground for all your alcoholic thinking to generate a lot of rationalization; as Chief says, it is getting "into the ring with the Beast." Not such a good idea. The likely outcome is very clear.

[Wish Upon a Star]

Army Thread 26th November

I very rarely visit my dads grave .. maybe once a year and sometimes not even that. It is such a difficult thing for me. Think the reason for this is i've never really dealt with they way he died.

[startingover]

Army Thread 26th November

I can totally understand that too...maybe now is a good time to start that process? You know, acceptance and grieving?

[Seacailin]

Army Thread 26th November

Hi ya Wipster
How are you?
Hi Wishy,
I can relate to what you are going through. My Mom's death was very traumatic to both my sister and myself. I don't think that my sister has ever visited the graveside; maybe once. I have gone a few times, but it is tough. I believe that we can connect with them without being at the grave. That's just me.

[Wish Upon a Star]

Army Thread 26th November

startingover;478105 wrote: I can totally understand that too...maybe now is a good time to start that process? You know, acceptance and grieving?

Your right starts, now is the time to start that. It'd been 11 years since he died so i really do need to start dealing with it.

[A Work in Progress]

Army Thread 26th November

limers;478028 wrote: I feel theres a real attitude of hierarchy that exists in this place where the only worthy members are the af ones.
When I joined here I wanted tio cut out my weekday drinking only and sort of felt dragged along to be a more worth member by striving to be fully af which I didnt REALLY want. Now im not blaming anyone for that , thats my head, thats me but I do feel that if your striving for a life of moderation , not an alcohol free life you are taken less seriously and almost seen as an annoyance!
I have never drank in the morning , have rarely drank in the afternoon, can stop drinking when ive reached my allowed quota, never drink and drive , never drink and dial(!!), never abuse my kids or partner cos of drink, have never tried to top myself because of it and have never nearly lost my family because of it....I simply dont want to drink EVERY day of the week.
If this post offends or pisses peeps off im very sorry , my intention is not that , I just want peeps to know where im at with all this, I feel a strong urge to divulge how I really feel.

limers, I don't know about anyone else, but as for me, I have a LOT of respect for people who are able to go from serious alcohol dependence to successful moderation. I have said this before, and I think it's very obvious, that there are very few people who are able to do that. That doesn't mean it isn't something that many people feel they need to try before they either become convinced that it is impossible for them, or until they succeed. Sometimes those attempts lead to disaster, because they involve... guess what: drinking! And I think that going for years, drinking "moderately" sometimes and getting drunk sometimes, is just the same as what we call "having a problem with alcohol." Seems like a miserable way to live... to me. I did it for years. And it just kept getting much worse, so that I was very rarely drinking "moderately."

When you decided to drink on the weekends, a lot of people (including me) offered you their support. I hope you do well with it; I hope you turn into a genuinely successful "modder." I hope that you develop a real program to help you do that, which (if I were to do it) might involve posting on the moderation threads, using the Drink Tracker, using the other tools involved in the MWO program, etc. I don't know if you are doing any of those things, or not. I hope you are because I am sure they will give you the best chance of succeeding.

From what you are saying about the alcohol problem that brought you here, it sounds as if you were not having problems that were as serious as what most other people here have experienced. Certainly not as bad as the drinking that I was doing! Clearly, those whose problems are less deeply entrenched, less severe, are more likely to succeed at a program of moderate drinking. And if you are able to do that, you can surely become a great help to others here who want to do that.

wip

[Guest]

Army Thread 26th November

wip...I did get alot of support here last week and it was great. I was just pissed off this morning and had a rant and havent a clue as to the real reason why! Sorry.

Im having HUGE problems with my teenage son at the moment who stayed out all night and I didnt know where, he just came home now, he went to a concert and I didnt see him till now, turned off his phone and wasnt where he said hell be . My heads in bits at the moment at im sorry to be bringing it all here and picking a fight with the only place and peeps that give me any comfort at all about anything!

[Guest]

Army Thread 26th November

One , good luck to you, your a strong woman and I love you.

[AAthlete]

Army Thread 26th November

Oney, my personal opinion? If we don't talk about the things that are bothering us, our minds have a way of twisting it so badly that we may end up losing our sobriety or our ability to mod successfully. Internalization has a way of building up, and somehow sometime it is going to come out - and for me that was always at the bottom of a bottle.

Conversely, getting it out of your head and sharing with others takes away that problem's power. Remember my little rant on the #%$^$ thread about my Mom flying out for Christmas? After posting about it, talking to you guys and having a good workout it was gone - and I mean completely gone. I went from being pissed off to realizing that I should be grateful for being able to enjoy her company sober on the holidays.

Which leads me to Limers... Sorry that you feel like this thread is for AF people only. I can't be envious of your situation, but am happy for you and encourage you to follow the path that you have laid out. Life is all about balance, and it sounds like you have that right now and you should embrace it. If you find it swinging out of balance, then you need to reevaluate, but for now full steam ahead and screw everyone else - your happiness comes first.

note: Everyone else, I mean screw in the nicest possible way!

[Guest]

Army Thread 26th November

Thanks AA!

[Guest]

Army Thread 26th November

im off school collecting...see you all later!

[cymru]

Army Thread 26th November

Im behind you 100% Oney xx