"Practically everybody wishes to be rid of his most glaring and destructive handicaps. No one wants to be so proud that he is scorned as a braggart, nor so greedy that he is labeled a thief. No one wants to be angry enough to murder, lustful enough to rape, gluttonous enough to ruin his health. No one wants to be agonized by the chronic pain of envy or to be paralyzed by sloth....
We who have escaped these extremes are apt to congratulate ourselves. Yet can we? After all, hasn't it been self-interest, pure and simple, that has enabled most of us to escape? Not much effort is involved in avoiding excesses which will bring us punishment anyway. But when we face up to the less violent aspects of these very same defects, then where do we stand?"
I have to be honest.. There are times that I relish in lesser degrees of these handicaps. How many times since getting sober have I said something simply to try and impress someone... or become upset when someone cut me off in traffic.... or wished that I could have someones job that paid more than mine....
What I have to remember is that I am never, ever going to be perfect. Yes I have beat my alcoholism (so far), but I have to continually be on-guard for those very things that used to make me want a drink. I need to work on recognizing them when they occur, accepting them, and then letting them go. That perfectionism that I used to have (all or nothing) has faded a bit but will never be truly gone and as long as I understand that I will be in a better position to maintain my sobriety.
Sorry for the long-winded post.
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