I'm back....

[Lefty]

I haven't posted here since I went through an alcohol aversion program 8 months ago (Shick Shadel hospital). $20,000 later...I don't drink anymore. But I find that I'm starting to want to. I think the quest for the magic bullet has failed once again. I know I need to start dealing the WHY I feel I need to face the world through a substance-induced haze. So many things are better since I don't drink...but I'm scared I'm going to backslide. I was stupid to leave this site. Being here for the couple of months before I went to Schick truly kept me sane. I have spent the last hour reading posts...you people are so inspiring. I think this is where I need to be.

[cyclefan]

I'm back....

Welcome back Lefty. Do you have a plan?

[beatle]

I'm back....

Hey Lefty, welcome back. I think no matter what other steps you take to make YOUR OWN programme for quitting and staying quit alcohol, it is good to have this place to come to... through thick and thin, as they say.

Go ahead and post whatever, whenever, and there are always people here who can RELATE and usually can help.

8 months sober, hey, that's not bad, you know. Let's keep on going, eh?

[startingover]

I'm back....

Hi there Lefty, months is great!! Well done! I think sometimes people lose that "honey moon period" after a time and it is normal to have the old mental craving chattering away in your head for a while. This will pass, but its just as well to stay here and read and post to get your motivation back.
Are you looking after yourself generally? Eating well, sleeping well and exercising? All these will help keep your mind healthy. Do you have any specific worries that are troubling you at the moment? Dont forget that alcohol will NEVER ever help those? Are you bored? that can also be a big trigger...
Just a few things to think about but mostly stick around, you will gain strength and momentum here...

[keepwalking]

I'm back....

why do you THINK you want to? is it the rebel in you seeing if you can?? guess what you cant so dont even go there! What about starting a new hobby? you are bored , you need a new challenge, you;ve cracked the drink so look forward and crack something else, you are so strong to beat this demon, what about running a marathon or even a one mile walk, go for it, live your new life you have worked hard to get it, you deserve it so dont blow it!
KW X

[Lefty]

I'm back....

Thank you so much for your thoughtful replies. NO I don't have a plan...I'm working on it. And yes, I'm bored. I'm bored with the minutia of life. I'm tired of dishes and laundry and picking up after people. I think I've forgotten how to find joy in everyday life. Isn't that what wine was for?? My favorite fantasy right now is to get in my car and just keep driving.

Re: running a marathon...I almost fell out of my chair laughing. If someone with a chainsaw was chasing me, I MIGHT be able to run as far as my driveway. More likely, I'd just say: I'll hold still if you make it quick.

[startingover]

I'm back....

At least you still have your sense of humour Lefty!!!

There is a thread in Monthly Abstinence called the tool box thread. That has loads of ideas for making a plan and tips to keep sober, its really good.
You'll sort this i am sure....

[betty boop]

I'm back....

Lefty, welcome back ...... and BE STRONG!!!!! I know how you feel, but you really are better off without AL .........

Love & hugs, BB xx

[gyco]

I'm back....

hi lefty,how long were you there,i dont no you but ,down for the count,tht was a great phrase at the place i went to,there is nothing wrong with drinking,if you can control it,20 thousand dollars,dang i cant amagine how much AL i could by for tht,i also was in a facility,this year,theynever told me i was a an alchoholic,i said it,just to get out,only 30 days,and i was sober for 4 months b4 i got there,your journey begins with you,no one else can decide tht,over the last 13months ive lerned to slow down,pace yur self,i remember one of the doctors asking me ,gyco whats your problem,my reply was i dont hav a problem,stopping,it was staying stopped,like many say here for us its a WAR,no matter where you go,the answer will lie in you,to drink or not to drink,tht is the question,gyco

[AAthlete]

I'm back....

Lefty, sounds like you are in a little bit of a rut right now. Our sobriety, unfortunately, doesn't run on inertia and we need to continually work on nurturing it or else we stand the chance of losing it.

So, what were the things that you were doing when you first got out of aversion program? Sounds like they had an impact if you were able to stay sober up until now. As others have, you need to get a plan together to get you going in the right direction again.

[Noelle]

I'm back....

OMG Lefty.........I missed you sooooo much!!!!!

[notevergivingup]

I'm back....

Welcome back Lefty!

Twosox