Is it the right time?

[Lyndieloo]

I am just not sure if its the right time to try and embark on stopping drinking. Just so much stress going on at the moment. Going through a divorce after 17 years. My ex has started dating a friend who lives across the road from me. I have two girls and I cant get my head around her "mothering" them. Aslo I wont have my girls for Christmas or New Year - just not sure how I will cope!

Any advice please!

[cymru]

Is it the right time?

Hi Lyndie. I think the reasons you give are a perfect reason NOT to drink over Christmas. I have an 8 year old who spends time with me and her mum, but i will not see her atall over christmas as she is going to lapland with her 'other' family. Now, i could either drink myself to sleep every night and feel sorry for myself and have a crap christmas or i could not drink, make the most of what ive got and finish the year sober, and maybe liking myself a bit more.
Is drinking going to help your situation over the christmas period or make it worse? Are you going to hide the feeling you have with a bottle or face up to them and not let booze control your feelings. Remember, you are in charge, not alc.
Keep posting and reading. Were all going through something christmas, with all the booze and drunkness around.
all the best to you.

[greeneyes]

Is it the right time?

Lindy, that IS a situation where one would be tempted. But as everyone says, drinking will only make things worse. Estranged one left me right after I quit drinking and moved in with the recepitonist (we both work for him). Navigating a divorce and employment situations I made and am making life choices and it is essential for me to be clear-headed. Being sober is the absolute best thing I could ever do for myself during these times. particularly now but really it's the best thing for ANYtime. It's probably the best thing you can do for your girls too. Lots of people are here to support you. :l

[Sunbeam]

Is it the right time?

It IS the time to start coming here, start making a plan, read the posts here. Your holidays would be better without alcohol, but if you are not ready to take that step, at least make a plan and pick a date, get your ducks in order.

[Lila]

Is it the right time?

Lindyloo
I just went through a divorce, too. You can always pm me. Are you on the program? Treat yourself, to the whole deal; the AllOne, everything. Exercise, get a nice hair cut and foil. You need to really pamper yourself.
Honestly, I would have a really hard time with the girlfriend stuff, I would.
Take care of yourself, this IS a new beginning! This can be YOUR miracle - it was for me.
Lila

[bestlifeldms]

Is it the right time?

Lyndie,

It is always the right time to stop drinking. As others have said, it sounds especially advisable, given your current situation. I can empathize with you. I had 3 children, hub had two. When we married we had custody of all 5 together. Their other parents lived in two different states, so we always let the kids go there for the holidays, since they were with us the rest of the time. It was really wierd at first, but I found out that movie theatres are open on Christmas and New Years, and once you adjust your thinking, it can really be enjoyable. We always had our Christmas after they came back, that way I could take advantage of bargains after the holiday. Be sure to buy the "high demand" items ahead, because you can't find them later. As for the idea that someone else is "mothering" your girls. No one can ever be their mother, but you! Fact, period! It IS hard. Since you know this person, you have some idea what kind of environment they will be in, and hopefully that is a good thing. I would assume that she (the ex-friend across the street) is aware of your situation with alcohol, since the two of you were friends. In that case it would make me even more determined to not drink, so that the issue cannot be of any consequence. I am so fiercely competitive that I would do anything, to be ~~~ "The Best Mom In The World!" Keeping your head clear, is definately the "higher road". Good luck! Best