"Marlatt uses the acronym SOBER to instruct patients on how to deal with a slip, or fight off the urge to do so. The "S" stands for stop: Pause for a moment and consider what you are doing. "O" means observe: Think about what you are sensing, feeling and experiencing, and what events led to the situation. "B" is for breathe ? take a few deep breaths. Then, Expand your awareness and remind yourself of what will happen if you keep repeating the unwanted behavior and how you will feel afterward. "R" stands for respond mindfully: Remember that you have a choice, that you are not powerless and that you don't have to continue the undesired behavior."
"Marlatt teaches a technique called "urge surfing" as a way to cope. "The urge is like a wave," he says, "It goes up and down. You don't try to get rid of it, but accept it and let it pass." People tend to think that urges will escalate infinitely if they don't yield to them ? but in fact, like a wave, they rise to a peak and then fall. That is, even if you don't give in, the urge dissipates.
Indeed, because of the way the brain is wired, each time an addict lets an urge pass without engaging in the unwanted behavior, it weakens the neural connections that underlie the desire; each time he or she rewards the craving with the bad habit, the brain pathways, and the addiction, are strengthened. It helps for people to remind themselves that if they can resist an addictive urge this time, it will become easier and easier to do it again in the future"
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