I cut down on my posting, cos it looks like this site is extensively monitored and it looks like its not a good idea to think outside the sqare. Anyways i decided to stay (thank you for all PM), although as i said i will cut down on posting.
Now the question.
Why i need to fight all the time? Ok i am AF now (staying AF is easy FOR ME ) ,i quit smoking(not as easy as staying AF, but not that difficult either).
The problem for me is that i want another challange. Why cannot i be just content and be happy with what i achieved so much. The next challenge for me is to learn how to moderate(i have to be very careful here as this site does not approve moderation-except the official MWO way which i dont even know cos i never read the book).
The only thing that stops me from trying is the fear of AL.
I'm really scared of alcohol now. I never ever want to experience the withdrawals again. Hopefuly it will pass one day(it never did for drugs).
Once the fear passes i will try to learn how to moderate and see if i am strong enough(i love testing myself).
Why, why i cannot just be content and be happy with what i achieved?
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