*Deep breath* --- Wow ---
Not only are the stories of the addicts themselves heart wrenching - but so is watching the pain inflicted on their families. It probably, for the first time ever, took my focus off of what I am feeling and shift it to what my family is witnessing and how it may affect them. I got a little clue the other night when Mr. Wonderful mentioned that he sometimes wonders what may await him at home.. whether I was 'present' or lost in a haze.
Which, in turn, brings about that nagging feeling of guilt. For the last half hour or so, I've been feeling terribly guilty. And, now, I think I'm done For it seems to me, guilt is such a useless emotion; it serves NO purpose, it cannot change events, it doesn't right anything, it doesn't bring about change, it usually doesn't even make the 'guiltER' feel better, much less the 'guiltEE'.
The one thing we CAN do for our families is to tackle today and every day with new resolve. Resolve to be the person they love, resolve to consciously refuse to put them through this again. Resolve to love ourselves as they love us and resolve to believe in ourselves as they do.
I say.. down with guilt and resolve for office! Or something like that.
Comment