So... not sure what you would want us to say to you at this point? It sounds like you have made up your mind to drink, and it is never helpful for your friends to try to talk you out of it. Only you can do that... we all have to do that, for ourselves, during times like this very difficult time you are now having.
You said: "I wonder why I am bothering." That sums it up, doesn't it? What helps me when I am in a difficult situation, and tempted to drink, is to give some serious thought to that very question. Why DO I bother? For me, it's pretty easy to answer that question: I know, from my own rotten experiences, that no situation is so bad that it won't get worse, MUCH WORSE, if I drink...
I hope you decide to come through this without deciding not to make things even worse, by drinking.
Comment