Just a note to those who have been trying and trying for so long to beat the beast and are weary with the fight. After three full years of trying and failing and trying and failing and trying some more, I have finally achieved 30 days without alcohol! I feel so free. It feels like I've made it through a long drawn out divorce and the relationship has finally ended leaving me free to be my own woman. Free at last, free at last!!!
And I really do feel freed from my relationship with alcohol. I just can't imagine choosing to have a drink again. However, I will continue to be vigilant. The last three years have been hard, and I learned much. After trying to quit for awhile, the amount I drank doubled for a year. Then the past year I had cut back to a single bottle of wine 3 or 4 nights per week (a typical week). Though I was grateful for cutting back that much, I knew it wasn't enough - because I wasn't free.
For me, breaking free was definitely a process. So I just want to offer to those of you still trying ... know that it is a process, a journey. It's not just about drinking vs. not drinking. It's also about dredging up from the depths of your soul understanding, compassion and acceptance for who you are and where you are. And for me, the big turn around came when I really, truly got it that I have the complete power to choose the quality of my life. And so I now choose to no longer merely endure life, but to live my life. I don't know if I would now have the desire to really LIVE if it weren't for the journey of the last three years.
Hang in there, keep trying, learn about who you are and why you do what you do, and don't lose sight of your destination.
Peace,
MyOwnWoman
:l
Comment