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My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

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    My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

    My son seems to have a level head....but a wild side too ! He talks about when he turns 21 he wants to go out with his buddies and have a good time ! (21 is the legal drinking age in the US). I've preached to him about the evils of Alcohol......I hope he's listened ! He's drank before, in his freshman year of college, his class went to Euorpe for 2 weeks. Just a father that's been through all the bull crap of drinking. IAD
    ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
    those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
    Dr. Seuss

    #2
    My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

    tough one iad...my daughter is only 10, but with a mother and grandmother who are alcoholics, i have made sure to be honest with her about the effects of al. i try not to moralize or preach, and i hope that works. we can only hope our words and current sober actions help them make good choices.

    time will tell, eh?

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      #3
      My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

      IMHO--IAD, just make sure he knows the facts. Warn him about binge drinking and alcohol poisoning. If he has a level head he should understand the concept that bad things can and will happen. Of course he knows the dangers of drinking and driving.

      I'll be where you are in 7 years--not looking forward to it really!

      Best wishes!!:h
      _______________
      NF since June 1, 2008
      AF since September 28, 2008
      DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
      _____________
      :wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
      5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
      _______________
      The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:

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        #4
        My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

        That is difficult. So far our 14 year old doesn't like alcohol. He knows how his dad and his mother's bf get mean when drinking.

        I know what I'd do, I'd say, I don't approve of your getting drunk, but if you do I will pick you up wherever you our and make sure you get safely home, or you can take a cab to my house and I'll pay for it.

        "Course, I've already told him if he ever wants to have sex see me for condoms. I'm too damn young to be a grandma!

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          #5
          My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

          Yes, just as LVT has said. The only thing you can do is tell him the truths about what drinking can do. Especially in excess.

          It is stressful being a parent. We will never stop worrying. xoxoxoxo

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            #6
            My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

            It's terrible when you've been a rat part of your life ( drinking wise )......and now you have to pay the piper ! Thanks for all your help ! IAD.
            ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
            those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
            Dr. Seuss

            Comment


              #7
              My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

              He must have seen the worst of you when you were drinking ?
              Have you discussed how you have medical/psychological/addiction problems due to drinking ... I am not saying you do, but maybe he needs to see that these are possible ... I would think he must know, just tell him that it does run in families and you wouldn't want him to suffer as you have ... ?

              OR ... maybe just tell him to read ALL our posts on here or the threads by family members of alcoholics ...
              ?We are one another's angels?
              Sober since 29/04/2007

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                #8
                My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                Thanks Heavenly....He's seen it ! he knows....maybe that 's will keep him straight ! IAD
                ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
                those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
                Dr. Seuss

                Comment


                  #9
                  My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                  I was still drinking when my boys were at that age. My dad was an alcoholic and comitted suicide when they were 1 and 4. They don't remember him or his death, but we never kept it from them.

                  I remember saying to them, "your grandfather was an alcoholic, I'm a heavy drinker and probably well on my way. There is scientific evidence that alcoholism has a genetic link, so if you drink, chances are at some ponit you will develope a problem with it..." That was about 8 or 9 years ago. Now, one is a chef in a high end restaraunt, and he drinks alot, and the other is a paramedic who is just a social drinker. But the point is, they KNOW alcohol is a problem in our family, and it will always be in the back of their minds.

                  We can't protect them, we can only try and educate them.

                  Don

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                    #10
                    My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                    Tradition...???

                    It is a somewhat "tradition" here in MN to take the birthday person out on his/her 21st and buy 21 shots. In the last year or so---three deaths from AL poisoning. One kid choked on his own vomit. NOT GOOD>

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                      #11
                      My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                      I was just going to say the same thing. Dr. Phill had a show on this.
                      Be sure to share with him the danger of "21".
                      "Be still and know that I am God"

                      Psalm 46:10

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                        #12
                        My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                        THE TRIALS OF BEING A PARENT!!!!

                        Super mom here (NOT!!!) my sons are 18 (in march) and 16. Both have little tipples of alcohol with their dad. My youngest loves alcopops. I am not sure what you can do. Because he is an adult, hopefully, he will be sensible and not succumb to the evil foe like we did. Either way, I guess you just got to sit on the sidelines and watch. I took my children to a drugs den when they were younger to teach them about the real side of drugs and not the glamourous film star drug addiction. The real wretched kind. It worked as all my sons mates' smoke cannabis, whereas he is under no illusion. I worry too so I understand where you are coming from. Let him be who he is meant to be. But just be there.

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                          #13
                          My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                          IAD, you can always lock him in the basement until he is 65. :H
                          If you do not live the life you believe, you will believe the life you live.

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                            #14
                            My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                            IAD .. get him a Barbie Doll. :H

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                              #15
                              My oldest Son turns 21 in 2 weeks.....what do I do?

                              yo iad i here you at 21 its up to him,here in Canada it is 19,my son is going to Vegas with his older brother to celebrate 21, September,most have tried long b4 that, we can only wish the best,just like ourselves freind

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