Moo's Plan

[Blue Sky]

Moo's Plan

Well done Moo!

I'm chuckling here cos I think your friend will be on the phone to all your mutual friends speculating that you are preggers! After all, why would anyone who has previously enjoyed a glass or two (at least) of the good old vino be refusing?

[scrubbly]

Moo's Plan

Hi Moo:

I might not have posted today since I drank last night (and am feeling sorry to have done so) but for you sharing about your experience of champagne when things didn't work out as you had planned.

You have provided me hope today and kept me here and posting, which can only help in this journey.

I think my next step is to start building a tool box, because I have found that once I take a drink I don't have any planning in place to keep it from turning into the whole bottle of wine as has been my issue. Sun is right, the AF days are easier in a lot of ways. I'm off to check out the occasional drinking thread and the tool box items others have used and get going so I'm not left without a plan next time!

:thanks:

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

BLUESKY - I am laughing my head off here...you are probably right, hadnt thought of that....lol


SCRUBBLY - I am really really pleased you have posted and again and that you are continuing with everything. You will, like me, and many others get it right sometimes and not others. I am well up for AF time and in ways its much easier, but I am not ready to throw in the towel, I still like a few drinks and am sure I can learn to get it right if I dont do it too much. Glad my wafflings have been useful...LOVE MOO

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

WEEKEND PLAN.

Well as we plod towards the weekend I have been considering what I will do with my AF weekend. Considered a saturday night trip to the cinema, but frankly bugger all on I want to see. So instead I think me and Mr Moo will head out to our favourite curry house. This was one of the things that I did on one of my saturdays in the early days of the first AF stretch, so to some extent it is conquered territory.

I have stated to Mr Moo that I will drive, this will allow him a couple of beers, which is a nice treat for him and I actually find when I have set my mind to not drinking it does not bother me what those around me are doing. In fact, if anything I get a feeling of piousness (word?) Piety (?).

I am not concerned with Friday or Sunday night, these should be fine!! Famous last words! No they will be.

I have been wondering whether I MIGHT allow myself to share a bottle of red wine with Mr Moo next weekend. I had thought that I would not drink at all up until my holiday (and indeed I may very well not). But, I have also been thinking that if I always wait for some big occasion to drink, then there is always a bit more of an excuse to drink more than mod limits. So, in a sense I dont get a chance to "practice" getting it right in a more calm enviornment.

I thought a bottle of red wine MIGHT be an idea, because, firstly it is something MR Moo likes so he will definitely drink his share. Secondly, it is not something I normally drink favouring Rose or White and often sparkling wine. I have found when I have drunk red, it is more to be savoured. Plus it is something different and thus not part of the old habits.

These are just thoughts, ramblings whatever. I might very well stick to being completely AF before my hols, but I am not so uptight with the necessity to do a very long run this time, as I have very recently achieved this. So I wont treat it as a failure if I make a conscious decision to try something else. So long as there is a genuine reason, rational and I am always thinking about what I am doing. I think it is the thinking about it which is the key to being more successful. I didnt used to think to much about it beyond feeling awful after I had had too much and swearing I would never do it again! Now, I must admit I do have more thoughts of AL, but they are mostly thinking up strategies for not drinking, ways of going for longer without AL, how to avoid it, still have a good time without it. Its not as simple as just wanting to drink, that need is beginning to fade a bit. Its a long way from gone I accept, but there are big improvements.

I did wander earlier today if all this thinking about it was bad for me and making me "dwell" on AL more than necessary. But I then when I consider how much better things have been since so doing, I have to accept that there is more good than bad in the equation.

So thats the latest......

Moo

[scrubbly]

Moo's Plan

Hello Moo dearie!

Your weekend plan sounds good. I too plan to be AF for the weekend since last weekend I was not and also could not consider my Saturday consumption levels anything "moderate" and I drank without a plan of any kind.

Best of luck the next 2 days!

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

Hey Scrubbly...thanks for the support and right back at you. Its nice to have an AF partner. It's almost like having someone else as well as yourself to be accountable to. The idea of letting someone else down is almost as bad to me and letting myself down. So we are in it together.

Good luck and may the (8th) be with you!

love moo

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

Its late friday night and I have just entered my little zero on drink tracker before going off to bed, knowing I will wake up saturday morning feeling refreshed and happily able to go off to the gym, get lots of gardening done and then go out for my curry saturday night with Mr Moo. Have a nice sense of well being. Night Night

Moo

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

Saturday!

Its been a good day, I went to the gym and got all my household chores completed. I am just about to get ready to go out for my AF night (still not sure if having a curry or italian!). I have noticed that since last weekends blip, I have been posting a lot more this week and I have had AL on my mind more. I dont mean thinking about it as in wanting it in the week but just wondering how best to procede. It has just been on my mind more again. I hope this is good as it means I am dealing with it.

I have had some minor beasty naggings this week, but it has not been awful and I am definitley in control of them. They have not been about drinking at the time, but the beast asking when he can again., It is almost as though he wants an end point. Like where he went through the eight weeks, he knew when his end point would come. I am more vague with him about it now. I have been thinking I might do another eight weeks AF, I have also thought I might allow myself to share a bottle of wine with Mr Moo next weekend. I am thinking that maybe the indecision, the lack of knowledge as to what is going to happen is unsettling to the beast. I think it may account for the bit of nagging and the more thought about AL and coming here more for posting and reassurance. I think the beast like me responds well to a deadline!!!!! Goal orientated that we both are!!!

Anyway, I think that if I have an urge to post, I will post. I will ramble to my hearts content as it hurts nobody. There is no compulsion for people to read all this, but they are very welcome if any good can come of it. Thus its only going to be helpful to me.

I am going to forget all about it now, take a couple of kudzu and drink a pint of water whilst getting ready to go out. I am going to drive, stuff my face with some lovely food and get another good nights sleep. Tomorrow will therefore be another good day and I will feel great to have achieved another AF weekend. I am racking up more and more of these.

I can think somemore about next weekend, once I have nailed this one!

Bye for now....

Moo

[Sunbeam]

Moo's Plan

Moo, is is always good to hear from you. I regard some of my posts as a public journal about my relationship with alcohol. It is always good to be aware of your thoughts about drinking. Writing them down helps me know my current thoughts - sometimes I'm not sure until I write it down. Sometimes I return to edit until it reflects what I really am saying to myself. If anyone wants to learn from my posts, the opportunity is there. But we are each such unique individuals.

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

YAY

I had a really nice meal out last night. I followed my plan to the letter and had a good time. I think it is a different time, yet still a really good one. We had Pizza out and Mr Moo had a couple of beers with dinner. We then came home and watched CSI (love it) and Mr Moo had one more beer. I find that it doesnt bother me if he is drinking and I am not. I did think it might, but I am really pleased that it does because Mr Moo has a happy healthy relationship with AL and if anything I can learn by watching what he does. He is like a time and motion study!!!

As a result of not drinking last night, I have had a happy healthy and productive sunday. I feel pretty pleased with myself and ready for the next week AF. I am still flirting with the idea of sharing a bottle of red wine with Mr Moo next weekend. I have mooted it with him. His view is that if I only ever drink on a special occasion I am almost giving myself permission to over do it on those occasions. Instead, he thinks, i should occasionally drink on a non special occasion and make sure I can do so within mod limits. It might take the pressure off and the egde of when I do allow myself some AL. This is his point of view and I am leaning towards trying it next weekend. i.e, having a nice bottle of wine with a meal, at home, with lots of water and lots of kudzu, knowing that once that bottle has gone there will not be any more to come. This is something that I want to feel I have conquered and sort of feels like the next challenge.

I will give myself a couple of days into the week to rattle this round the brain and then make a decision mid week. I am leaning towards trying it, then making the following weekend another AF weekend whatever the results, to keep lots of AF time as I do feel that I still need to keep at this.

So all in all a great result this weekend. I hope everyone else, especially you SCRUBBLY had a weekend in line with what they wanted to achieve.

Sunbeam, I agree it is very individual, but I know I get lots out of reading other people's thoughts and ideas. In fact of late I have been going much more reading than posting (other than in this thread as I know this is mine to waffle in and no one else has to be sbjected to it, unless that is their wish). I hope some time soon to be able to start offering some more thoughts to others as you feel able to do now.

Love to all you fab personages...Mooooooo

[scrubbly]

Moo's Plan

Nice work on Saturday Moo! Glad to hear your weekend went as planned.

Well I had what I guess I would call a "sandwich" weekend. Great success Fri and Sun going AF but Sat was a bit of a flop. I'm trying to figure out these Saturday triggers, it is usually the toughest day for me to resist temptation. I'm not getting down about it though, I'll just keep analyzing and trying more tools until I find what works. Looking forward to a good stretch of AF days ahead this week!

[scrubbly]

Moo's Plan

Miss Moo and Sunbeam...

This is a cross post from the 4-Day AF Binge thread, which I know that Sun sometimes pops into, but wanted to put it here too because it feels something of a milestone....

Big deal for me today, I sent the bottle of red wine that my hubby had bought for mother's day home with my mother in law (she was the only one who had had any with dinner). I told her that the reason I wanted her to take it home was because it wasn't my favorite kind but I actually told my husband that the reason I sent it home with her is because I find that when I have red wine in the house I drink too much of it.

This is the first time I've actually come out and SAID that I might have a problem with drinking. I don't know if he has realized it himself, but he has never brought it up with me and clearly if he bought me a bottle of vino for Mother's Day dinner he is not trying to get me to stop or something. Weird. I didn't have some grand plan for any of this, I just blurted out that I wanted my MIL to take the wine home with her because I didn't want a nearly full bottle in the house, and then after the in-laws were gone I just blurted out to my husband the real reason I had asked her to take it with her. He didn't make a big thing out of it when I said this, just nodded and went on with filling the tub for our three-year-old's bath, so I decided it didn't have to be a big deal but it made it more REAL for me to have said it out loud and it will make me think twice before stopping at the liquor store again anytime soon since I have put it out there with him now.

I suppose it's like some stuff I was reading on the boards the other day, which said something to the effect of there are times when we just need to quit thinking about ourselves, our problems, our addiction, etc etc. and just get on with things. I believe that there are times that I overthink this issue to the point that I just make it worse instead of just living my life. I know that I have to pay attention/not get complacent when cravings arise and bad habits raise their ugly heads, but realistically for me that is not every minute of every day, it never has been (thank heavens).

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

Midweek blabberings!

Well its hump day, and I have a day working from home. Lovely.

The weeks going well. I have definitely nailed week day time AF (Sunday - Friday). Although previously mostly AF in the week, there were exceptions, whereas now, there are no exceptions and the beast, if he nags, only nags about whether he will be allowed some AL at the weekend. That said he is much more accepting of the fact that he will no longer be allowed to drink every weekend.

It was suggested to me that to plan too much may not be a good thing, and I am still playing with this idea. But, I must say that I find (at the moment, might be because its still earlyish days) some comfort in planning. I know where I am. The beast seems to accept the status quo better. When he knew he was not allowed to drink for eight weeks, he eventually sort of gave in and stopped nagging. Because he has known over the last 2 weeks he would be AF, he has been pretty calm about it. If he has been around, he has been nagging only about the next occasion he knows he can drink. So it sort of focuses him!!

I have decided to experiment this weekend and go for a bottle of red wine with my hubby and a nice (but non-special occasion) dinner at home. I am going to shop for the dinner and the wine on the day (saturday) so that it doesnt become an issue before that. Mr Moo is happy to drink half the bottle and not open any more. Bingo. The success of failure of this dinner will lead to me having a better idea of whether my relationship with AL has changed, at all, not enough or is now much better. We will see.

For me there are now two elements to my succeeding. The first is to be able to have lots of AF time where AL is not even an issue, to be able to stay in or go out on a saturday and be happy not to drink, to be able to drive places etc. In short to be able to live the larger part of my life AF (this part is coming on a treat. There are lots of steps foward (all documented above) and I am really proud of this.

The second part which I am starting to think more about now I feel I am winning the other battle is to start drinking "within sensible" parameters when I do drink. Again, there has been massive improvements here, but I am not yet where I want to be and will keep working and analysing until I have the perfect balance (perfect for me that is).

SCRUBBLY, I hear you with the there are times when we need to stop thinking of ourselves thing, there is more to life and all that. And I could not agree more. All I will say is that I have found that using this thread as a journal (which I cant seem to get round to keeping any other way) for my own purposes is working really well. I had tried a few other things to cut down before finding this and had had some success for sure. I did get down to only drinking "too much" once a week, sometimes even less than that". But I would never have gotten through eight weeks AF without the advise and support here. Writing down my thoughts and waffling away to myself on this thread, whilst it is self indulgent, helps me no end. No one else is obliged to read it, in fact that was never the point of it. It started as an accountability tool and a planner. It has developed into an account of my ups and downs with this process that I can then refer to. It works for me. If anyone else wishes to read the "shit" that comes out of my brain, they are very welcome. I can only say the comments people leave are really appreciated and respected.


Thats all it for today....a happy midweek moo (off to the gym now)

[DeeBee]

Moo's Plan

mooderator;612963 wrote:

It was suggested to me that to plan too much may not be a good thing, and I am still playing with this idea.

Happy Hump Day Moo!
I too was told this and really I feel that we HAVE to plot and plan until we've created a new habit for ourselves. It's when we waltz into a situation without a plan that it turns pea-rshaped.

[mooderator]

Moo's Plan

Thanks Deebs.

That is sort of how I feel about it at the moment. I hope one day none of this will be an issue and I wont have to think about it (but I am not sure thats realistic), but at the moment having a plan is a comfort.

Nice to hear from you as always...Moo