Obstacles to Commiting to AF

[caysea]

Hi All
Another post got me to thinking about the elusive resolve we are after.Well I don't have the answer but I can give a big obstacle to that resolve. I AM DOING BETTER THAN BEFORE ONLY GETTING DRUNK 4 TIMES A WEEK INSTEAD OF 7.That kept me from making the type of commitment that is required to be AF. That fooled me into thinking I am doing better. If al is in your life at all and your goal is AF you have not made the commitment required.You are fooling yourself.I fooled myself for years.The younger you get al out of your life the easier it will be.
So yes each of us has to find our own key but all through these treads we can see each other's downfall.Learn from them! See the mistake I or the other person made and beware don't fall for it.Look at the old alcoholic not just the person on the park bench.Yes it is a matter of life or death.Their are no healthy alcoholics.One way or another as time goes on al wins and takes your...... LIFE. Treat it as the fight for your life which it is.

Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08

[tlrgs]

Obstacles to Commiting to AF

YEP I AGREE 115% IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO FIND A WAY OUT AND I THANK GOD MY HIGHER POWER AND ME THAT I MADE IT THIS FAR .. EVERY DAY THERE ALWAYS A DEFERENT OObstacles.. BUT IF YOU ARE COMMITED TO IT .. YOU CAN GET AND GO AS FAR AS YOU WANT ..
SORRY CAPS ..AND ONE DAY I WILL LEARN how to type too..
but as the saying goes one thing at a time ..
LMAO later stay strong and keep thinking positive

[A Work in Progress]

Obstacles to Commiting to AF

Caysea, I agree. For me, every single drunk episode carries with it the risk of various kinds of disasters, some of them potentially fatal. I absolutely have to give this problem the serious attention it requires, for the rest of my life.

[veritas]

Obstacles to Commiting to AF

I never want to get drunk again, but I know that I say that with great trepidation. One thing that I can never under estimate is the power that alcohol has over me. It's biggest trick is fooling me into thinking that there really were better times when drunk... or tiddly as the demon likes to call it.

The other day, I heard some music that lifted my soul. I was in another world with pure joy. For a few moments I was thoughtful. My addiction had lead me to beieve that I could only expreience that with the aid of a glass or two or three or.... of wine. It was good to be transported by the magic of the music alone.

[MyOwnWoman]

Obstacles to Commiting to AF

Caysea - I too did the "I'm drinking less than half what I used to" mind game for a year. It was great that I cut back for sure, and clearly part of my process -- but hanging on to that was getting in the way of my goal of being freed from the grips of alcohol. And maybe I had slowed my way to death a bit, I was still killing myself a little bit with each bottle I did drink. Physically, and spiritually - as I still beat myself up for not 'going all the way'.

It definitely required a commitment. And I thought I had made that commitment many many many times. But somehow this last time was for real. I guess what made a big difference was that I stopped fooling myself that I was okay with drinking 3 nights a week. I was not okay with it, and once I convinced myself that it was not okay to give in to the urge, my resolve and strength grew bigger than I ever imagined it could.

[A Work in Progress]

Obstacles to Commiting to AF

MyOwnWoman;560659 wrote: what made a big difference was that I stopped fooling myself that I was okay with drinking 3 nights a week. I was not okay with it, and once I convinced myself that it was not okay to give in to the urge, my resolve and strength grew bigger than I ever imagined it could.

This is a great observation. Those of us who have acquired a serious alcohol dependence ALL have cravings, urges, desires, impulses to drink. Somehow, during our drinking days, we convince ourselves that we are helpless in the face of these urges. We take a passive, victim-like stance toward them. That's why anti-craving medications are so popular (even though they really aren't all that effective for a lot of people, from what I have observed here at MWO): drinkers tend to believe that if we experience the dreaded CRAVINGS, then we WILL drink.

But we don't have to give in to urges, cravings, etc. It really is all about becoming a grown-up about alcohol, the same way we know that we must be grown-ups about so many other aspects of our lives. I might very well have a strong desire to do anything else instead of finishing this report that is due today... but I will always refuse to give in to the impulse to shirk off my obligations. It really is the same thing with urges to drink. I have to recognize two things: the consequences of giving in to impulses to drink, and the fact that I am in charge of managing my own impulses, my own behavior. And a third thing, too: that all cravings fade away, if I don't give in to them. Every single time, they go away. And the more I refuse to give in to them, the weaker they get, and the less often they show up to bother me. We are ALL stronger than we think we are. When we recognize that it really counts, we can do what we need to do quit wrecking our lives.

[lilmea]

Obstacles to Commiting to AF

[QUOTE]I never want to get drunk again, but I know that I say that with great trepidation. One thing that I can never under estimate is the power that alcohol has over me[/QUOTE

I have stopped drinking may times over the years. Why it took me so long to realize that there is more to sobriety than just not drinking I'll never know. It does take determination and it does take commitment. Changing how I think about things, how I deal with situations. I have discovered AL actually has been preventing me for enjoying life, from being happy. I had to make a plan and learn how to deal with life AF instead of hidding in a bottle.

It is getting easier. The thoughts of drinking aren't there as much. And the cravings aren't as bad and are getting to be fewer. But I know that I'm not cured. That I must always remember that I cannot take that first drink.

Thanks for this post MOW. It really hit home for me.