Frustrated with my family......

[Lavande]

Hello everyone,

Before I start my rant, I want to say thank you to MWO and all it's members! Reading your posts these last two months has helped me tremendously, really

I made a firm commitment back in January to get myself straightened out asap. The first thing I did was address my depression/anxiety by dumping my prescription medication (which wasn't working) and started on a good quality herbal supplement (Amoryn). I've read many, many books including 'Creating Optimism' which was incredibly helpful. I began moderating my wine intake in February when I joined MWO. Now, as we begin April I am AF 6 days.

I am feeling good, proud of my progress and am commited to continue. So why is my family looking at me like I'm crazy or just pretending. They have all decided that I should go to AA or seek out private counseling or go to Rehab. They all think they know what is best for me. I am convinced that I am the only one who knows what's best for me! The truth is, I am a college educated health care professional. None of them have any knowledge or experience that should make them feel comfortable giving me their advice on this subject.

I made my plan and have followed thru with it, sucessfully. Why can't they just be happy for me? I really don't want to hear anymore of their lectures, I don't need them. I am a strong person, can do this alone but wouldn't mind having their support - isn't that what family is for? I don't know why they are behaving this way. It's not as if I've been through this before and disappointed them. I just want them to be happy for me and with me.

Sorry about the long rant, I'm wondering if anyone else is experiencing this.
Guess I'm looking for some support and validation.

I know I can get that here.
Again, to all of you :thanks:

Lavande

[hart]

Frustrated with my family......

(((Lavande))))

Good for you 6 Days AF! I'm doing this with my hubby so that help tremendously. You know what I would say? May not care but I'm telling you anyway "I've made it 6 days w/o booze and I'm feeling good, why do you insist on me going to a treatment I have no interest in?"

You can point to a multitude of people here who have been and are being successful. You can explain this program is run by a woman who has been there, done that and has researched this subject thoroughly.

I'd probably say, please support me as I am alcohol free and pressuring me to a program I do not wish to attend makes me think you don't support me in my sobriety.

:goodjob::l

[Blue Sky]

Frustrated with my family......

Your actions will speak louder than words to them. Stay sober and they haven't got a leg to stand on! Sounds to me like a bit of attitude will help you. Use the "I'll show them" to keep motivated.

Good luck! And Well Done on the first 6 days.

[polaryzed]

Frustrated with my family......

Oh yaaaaa . . .

Do I hear you Lavande - Yep I certainly do!

I can't say they have suggested AA or rehab but some of the periodic snide remarks from certain ppl on hubby's side have made me a little tic'd off. To stay 'Calm' I dismiss the comments. Perhaps the jeers are far and few between so I figure they are not important enough to react to but . . . your thread certainly hits home.

Do any of your family members drink? Cuz they sound rather opinionated.

Their support would certainly be wonderful ~ As is the Support, Inspiration and Guidance -WE get from each other in the MWO forum.

And I love how Hart suggests you could approach the subject. It sounds very tactful and could bring positive results.

Stay well and congrats on the AF days . . . :l

[Lavande]

Frustrated with my family......

Thanks everyone,

I appreciate your comments and support!

Polaryzed - you had a good point. Each and everyone of my family members drink and I've seen them all stinking drunk one time or another. They have rather lofty opinions that have no basis. I never give anyone an opinion on anything until I'm asked. My theory is opinions are like a..holes, everyone has one and it's best to keep it to yoursef!!!!!!!

For now, I'm just going to ignore them and focus on my plan. Their unsolicited advice is annoying but I won't let them throw me off track. I just don't appreciate feeling like I'm being watched under a microscope, if you know what I mean.........

Thanks again everyone, I appreciate your kind words.

Lavande

[beautifulred]

Frustrated with my family......

Oh, how I know what you are going thru.....I made the mistake of going to a Dr. who...it turns out, is an alcoholic.....and not very successful at recovering......My soon to be ex's trooper picked him up 2 months ago for DUI. I confessed everything in order for him to R/X topa.....he did not believe and still does not believe this will help......a few weeks later, my soon to be x and I went to see him for my stbx's anxiety probs......HE BLAMED THE WHOLE THING ON ME AND MY "800 LB GORILLA" THAT HAS DISTROYED OUR MARRIAGE".....He did not listen to me when I said I had stopped drinking......he suggested....rather strongly, that I go into inpatient treatment and DID NOT listen to my hub and his issues at all.......

He is and always will be an AA proponent.....as it seems now, a failure.....sorry... dont mean to be judgemental but this has caused me a great deal of pain.

I guess what I am trying to say is this......if it works, don't change it......I would be very careful in whom I confide about my issues at this point in time.....I would now, only order topa via internet as this a fairly new science and we are the trailblazers.

Congrats on your successes so far and I wish you much luck.
:lBR

[Lavande]

Frustrated with my family......

Thanks Gia!

Beautifulred, WOW, I can't believe what you're going thru! You surely haven't gotten the help and support you need from your Dr. I'm so sorry to hear that.
I suppose that's why I chose to do more of a self help program. Being a health care professional myself I've learned to not automatically trust someone just because he calls himself Dr. Some of them have no capacity to sit, listen and understand let alone suggest treatment that's right for YOU.

I highly recommend doing a lot of reading. You can learn a lot about yourself, why you do what you do and how to go about eliminating bad habits, which are just learned behaviors. The book I mentioned in my original post 'Creating Optimism' really helped me so much.

I wish you the best on your journey and hope you find a better source for medical care.

Lavande