What about the kids?

[beautifulred]

We have battled/are battling our al demon.......our kids have seen some things that have really frieghtened them.....now they (in their teens) are battling their demons.....what seems like depression or ...(after being spoiled by years of feeling that we were not giving them enough emotional....we gave them monitary)...out and out self centeredness.....My question is?????????....When do they come around?.........days, months, years, have I messed her up for a long time?

[Prest4time]

What about the kids?

Hey Beautiful!

I am reading a lot on Co-dependency. It is painful. Some things I have learned and are changing are:

Unfortunately, when we become adults and have children, we take our brokenness into our adult lives, which overflows into our childrens lives.

We all have built in self defenses.. like adrenaline which is "fight or flight".

When a child is constantly having to protect itself from the broken lives of their parents, they take on an unhealthy state of survival. That "flight or fight" becomes their everyday normal over time. They develop classic survival behaviors. They do not ever get over it, but they can as we can, recognize it and choose a new path. One thing I am learning is to not expect my children to grow out or up out of something that I have never done. The responsibility rests with me.

As I have progressed and addressed my wounds, the family has become so much closer. Not without pain, but the rewards are well worth it.

I hope this helped a little, it has helped me a ton