The Next Day Thread 10th May

[startingover]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

I guess its not helping much.

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

I always take the blame. Because I have been drinking for so long - our whole relationship of six years - it usually was my fault I thought. It's hard to change that pattern.

[startingover]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Its part of recovery. Learning a different way of being.
Maybe you need some help?

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Yeah I know and the recovery can be the worst which is why I haven't recovered. I just need to sort myself again and not have such unrealistic expectations. You know, I thought he would be so proud of me. Well, he said he was, but only after I expressed such desire for him to say that. My whole reason that kept me going AF was him and our relationship.

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Notice I didn't say marriage. Strange in itself.

[startingover]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Yes, I can understand that. But I think with this, you have to put you first and do it for you.
Sometimes men are not very good at expressing their feelings, so he might think hes very proud but not say it..

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

I'm basically venting here Starts. I really appreciate you talking with me. You are a wonderful friend. But seriously, you can be helping people that really need your help more than I. I'm not sure what to do at the moment, but as everyone tells me I am strong. I know I am. Just weak at present. Thanks Mate.

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Please, Starts, go and help others. I'll be on here for a while, but I don't want to tie you up with my bitching.

[startingover]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Dafty!!
Talking or typing is sometimes the best way of clarifying our feelings. You will get to where you want to be in the end.

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

THANKS to EVERYONE for listening to my drama. On reflection, I have been very selfish.

[startingover]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

You are not bitching Pan so dont feel that. I am here until 2pm my time (about 10 mins) then I must go...

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Yeah, Starts, that's my problem for sending drunk emails. I write it down, think I'm good and send. Well, I can tell you, the next day I am horrified. I won't be doing that tonight. I probably will write my feelings to hub tonight, but will save to drafts and read tomorrow.

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Then I will send or not.

[startingover]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

Thats a good plan as long as you stick to it :-)

[Pan]

The Next Day Thread 10th May

No point in going over a dead horse. Thanks for being a great friend and I will see you on the morrow. Thanks so much.