I know this thought has been thrown around before but thinking about it today and realizing the importance it has in regards to our success I wanted to bring it up.
How many of of us[ before we admitted we were alcoholics] looked at someone who we thought was an alcoholic and said I am not as bad as they are so I am not an alcoholic.We all saw the poor soul in the park sleeping off a drunk and said that is an alcoholic. Well the mistake we made was in who we were using as our example.If we choose someone who didn't drink we would see that we were alcoholics.
This next idea might bring up some debate but that is good.How often when we have the goal of AF do we pat ourselves on the back because we are only drinking half as much as before.Yes that is good but it doesn't get you in the right frame of mind to making being AF your number one priority.How do I know because I did just that for years on my roller coaster ride to get al out of my life.I am not drinking as much as before, I am not going to the bar as often,I only had 6 beers instead of 12.
I thought i would gain control of my drinking.Never happened and never will.Again I was comparing to the wrong example.Myself at my worst and myself in my mind making it half way to recovery.Their is no half way.For us alcoholics it is all or nothing meaning NO drinking. The day you accept this and commit to NO DRINKING is when you are being honest with yourself.
The thought to realize is that you have to make the same commitment to stop drinking and follow through as that person who we see in the gutter. His bottom is deeper than ours but that could be us.The battle to get al out of his life will be just as hard for us who haven't gone that far but are alcoholics. If you are not committed to not drinking at all you won't be successful.IT IS HARD! Learn from my past mistakes of thinking I was making progress when I was cutting back.
I still compare myself but am very careful as to who and for what.Yes I like to compare myself to someone who doesn't drink and view my self as such.I compare my physical fitness to athletes not my old drinking buddies.I compare my life now AF [not just drinking only half the time or amount] to the past were everything centered around drinking and am so glad I stopped fooling myself.
Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08
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