Today will be my 1st AF day in a LONG time. (Later Edit: I actually chose to taper down a bit more, just in case I was taking it too quickly.) I wanted to share my tapering-off-to-AF, divided into Days 1 - 4, in case it relates to anyone else who's tapering down before going AF. I had more withdrawal symptoms than I expected, but feeling super great today. I was/am being careful to listen to my body at all times.
History: Rum and coke (or vodka) for quite awhile now - up to 750 ml (5th) a day - morning to night, but never getting drunk. Used to feel good to have a buzz, never got a hangover ... but my body has been "needing" alcohol lately to function - and that's a scary thing.
So, here's my week:
Day 0 (Mon.) - Drank the usual amount, drawn out from morning to night. Body angry in the a.m. and overnight: gagging, shakes, anxiety... needing that morning drink to calm down. I didn't even care about feeling buzzed anymore. I just wanted OUT, and I felt I was definitely at a turning point.
-- 14 drinks today.
Day 1 (Tue.) - The plan: Take the morning drink, and then simply try to make it as long as I could until my body got too uncomfortable and needed calming. Careful to stop sipping a drink each time I started to feel calmer. Drank lots of water.
-- 11 drinks today.
My body must have felt the 3 less drinks in it, because overnight was pretty uncomfortable, and the next morning. I felt quite ill and out of control of my body overnight, and I was ready to tell my husband about it if I got bad. I was getting pretty scared.
Day 2 (Wed.) - This was the worst day. Felt sick and was so upset at myself for getting myself to the point where I was so addicted. Agitated, nervous, uneasy as each drink wore off -- but I was angry with myself enough to keep fighting off the symptoms as long as I could. Mixing drinks more weakly. Felt like a bad flu. Much of this day was minute-by-minute.
-- 9 drinks today.
... Switching to beer for the rest of this journey. Sick of that toxic rum and coke taste. My husband usually has some beer in the fridge and I could have some of those, but he doesn't drink much and I'd need extra for this journey and would probably have to purchase extra and hide it in my spot for a couple of days as I used them. I hated that, but I guess I've been lying (about the extent of my drinking) for years now ... what's a couple more days?
Day 3 (Yesterday) - Wet, again, from sweating overnight, but my mind felt a bit more at ease today. It turned out to be a pretty good day. I was expecting more of the same as yesterday, but it was only about 50% as bad. Shakes there but not so noticeable. I have a stock of beer, if needed, and felt more in control. I did have a morning beer, and decided it would be my last morning drink, ever. Went for several brisk walks, cleaned my house too.
-- 7 drinks today .... and went to bed SOBER for the 1st time in years!
... I also went out and picked up a load of vitamins and supplements at my health store .. L-glut, Milk Thistle, a multi-vitamin, Vit. C, B vitamins, and even St. John's Wort... as well as lemon for water, green tea, fresh fruit, etc. May as well attack this from all sides, I figure.
Day 4 (Today) - Feeling great. Wow! Sweated like a pig last night - the worst sweat-session yet. Completely soaked. But, I was happy about it, as I knew my body was detoxing and that's a good thing. I hardly slept, but am not tired at all today. No shakes last night; none at all this morning.
-- No drinks today (it's almost noon, so still have some time to go). I feel great and know I can get through today . No anxiety. Feeling proud.
I realize there could be more withdrawal symptoms on their way, and I'll deal with them if they happen. As someone said in another post, I will tell myself: "I will handle it."
Thanks for listening. I think I'm on my way for good this time.
~Cat
History: Rum and coke (or vodka) for quite awhile now - up to 750 ml (5th) a day - morning to night, but never getting drunk. Used to feel good to have a buzz, never got a hangover ... but my body has been "needing" alcohol lately to function - and that's a scary thing.
So, here's my week:
Day 0 (Mon.) - Drank the usual amount, drawn out from morning to night. Body angry in the a.m. and overnight: gagging, shakes, anxiety... needing that morning drink to calm down. I didn't even care about feeling buzzed anymore. I just wanted OUT, and I felt I was definitely at a turning point.
-- 14 drinks today.
Day 1 (Tue.) - The plan: Take the morning drink, and then simply try to make it as long as I could until my body got too uncomfortable and needed calming. Careful to stop sipping a drink each time I started to feel calmer. Drank lots of water.
-- 11 drinks today.
My body must have felt the 3 less drinks in it, because overnight was pretty uncomfortable, and the next morning. I felt quite ill and out of control of my body overnight, and I was ready to tell my husband about it if I got bad. I was getting pretty scared.
Day 2 (Wed.) - This was the worst day. Felt sick and was so upset at myself for getting myself to the point where I was so addicted. Agitated, nervous, uneasy as each drink wore off -- but I was angry with myself enough to keep fighting off the symptoms as long as I could. Mixing drinks more weakly. Felt like a bad flu. Much of this day was minute-by-minute.
-- 9 drinks today.
... Switching to beer for the rest of this journey. Sick of that toxic rum and coke taste. My husband usually has some beer in the fridge and I could have some of those, but he doesn't drink much and I'd need extra for this journey and would probably have to purchase extra and hide it in my spot for a couple of days as I used them. I hated that, but I guess I've been lying (about the extent of my drinking) for years now ... what's a couple more days?
Day 3 (Yesterday) - Wet, again, from sweating overnight, but my mind felt a bit more at ease today. It turned out to be a pretty good day. I was expecting more of the same as yesterday, but it was only about 50% as bad. Shakes there but not so noticeable. I have a stock of beer, if needed, and felt more in control. I did have a morning beer, and decided it would be my last morning drink, ever. Went for several brisk walks, cleaned my house too.
-- 7 drinks today .... and went to bed SOBER for the 1st time in years!
... I also went out and picked up a load of vitamins and supplements at my health store .. L-glut, Milk Thistle, a multi-vitamin, Vit. C, B vitamins, and even St. John's Wort... as well as lemon for water, green tea, fresh fruit, etc. May as well attack this from all sides, I figure.
Day 4 (Today) - Feeling great. Wow! Sweated like a pig last night - the worst sweat-session yet. Completely soaked. But, I was happy about it, as I knew my body was detoxing and that's a good thing. I hardly slept, but am not tired at all today. No shakes last night; none at all this morning.
-- No drinks today (it's almost noon, so still have some time to go). I feel great and know I can get through today . No anxiety. Feeling proud.
I realize there could be more withdrawal symptoms on their way, and I'll deal with them if they happen. As someone said in another post, I will tell myself: "I will handle it."
Thanks for listening. I think I'm on my way for good this time.
~Cat
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