Not in the right place?

[Grim]

Hi all, I joined up last night under "Just getting started?" so being a total newbie I am not entirely sure that this belongs here, if not mods (is this place moderated?) please move to correct spot.
I am an IT infrastructure architect by trade but my true passion is anything aviation related and this works very nicely with my hobby of videography (and most recently stills work). Insert the "I hope I am not boring everyone senseless" emoticon here!
My source of confusion with my drinking habit is that I never touch a drop during the week (on call 24h a day!), but come the weekend, that changes and sometimes dramatically! This past sunday I fell off the balcony of my house, a drop of 4.5 meters, blessedly into some foliage after far too much red wine. Amazingly I am not seriously injured although in one whole heap of pain.
According to some, at this stage superficial research, I am a binge drinker (please correct my terminology at any stage). My question is as follows. Am I lying to myself by thinking it will be easier to abstain COMPLETELY due to the fact that I can contain my drinking to non work days? My apologies if this is a stupid question.

[cacky]

Not in the right place?

Grim, not sure what your question is but i think if you are asking whether you are going to be able to control this or not..that is only a question that you can answer. It stinks what happened to you last weekend but maybe its good that it brought you here. keep reading and posting. you will only be able to find that answer yourself.:welcome:

[Cinders]

Not in the right place?

Grim,

That question is asked by almost everyone who comes on here, although usually it is the other way around. "Am I lying to myself to think I can mod?"

Most people join MWO hoping they can moderate their drinking. Many do and many can't.

I am one of those who simply cannot. Once the alcohol hits my body, I am off to the races until passed out. I have proven this theory over and over and over, ad nauseum.

I definitely find it easier to abstain.

I am not a binge drinker, though, and I hope those who are jump in to give their $0.02.

I am an every day, any hour of the day or night, if there is some in the house, drinker and if there isn't anything in the house, I am figuring out ways to get some in the house. I am on my way, though, and finding my way after quite a bit of time here. There is hope, even for a recalcitrant like me.

So, we have different kinds of issues but the same enemy. Alcohol (we alude to him/her/it as "The Beast" or AL), can take us down many different paths but they all lead to the same end.

btw, it is fine to post in General or wherever you feel comfortable.

I, too, have injured myself while drunk. I usually don't know it until I come to, though. I call them drunk bumps. Very demoralizing.

Glad you are here. Keep reading and posting. You might also want to get RJ's book. It has great advice for all kinds of drinkers, not just those who want to moderate.

Cindi

[Grim]

Not in the right place?

Cacky, many thanks for the welcome. Even though it hurts to think about it (and sit, stand, walk, drive etc) I do take it as a day that I will remember forever and a very "sobering" turning point in my life. May I rephrase my question? Do the statistics point to a higher success rate of stopping for binge drinkers?

[cacky]

Not in the right place?

Good question. Im a binge drinker but i dont think i am as controled as you are. I have caused alot of wreckage in my life.

I know there are others that can way in. Hopefully you can find out. All i know is that this drinker..needs to make a commitment to stop drinking.

Maybe repost and put in your title a question on binge drinkers. you may draw the right people in

[lukalee]

Not in the right place?

How old are you Grim?
I would still call myself a binge drinker, even though I can drink almost every day. Like you, for many years I was a weekend warrior. Knowing that you are on call 24 hours during the week keeps you from drinking. What if that situation changes before you have the binge drinking under control? I think binge drinking is where many people start, but then continue to drinking more. I feel binge drinking is the most serious because it makes us feel more like party animals than alcoholics, but binge drinking is deadly.

[Grim]

Not in the right place?

Cindi, thank you for the candid reply. Lets make a promise to each other to keep the "drunk bumps" or as I refer to them in Afrikaans "brandewyn vlekke" Loosely translated as brandy scratches.
Cacky, I hear you about the life wreckage and feel for you on that one, done more than my share of that. None too proud.
All I can say, and it is something I am believing in more and more each day "the flame of hope burns bright and eternal!"
Anyway must turn in, good night from a mild winters night in South African!

[Boss.man]

Not in the right place?

Grim I think the quick answer is yes; it is easiest to abstain completely. For one thing, you can get rid of temptation by getting rid of bottles and habits.

In the long run, it may be worth testing now and then what your response is to alcohol. But for 30 days, and maybe a couple months, the easiest path is to abstain and create an alcohol free foundation.

[louise]

Not in the right place?

Welcome to the site. I can't answer whether becoming abstinent is easier for those who binge than daily drinkers, but it probably doesn't matter if you are determined. Can you tell us more about this concern? Maybe someone can give you a better answer if they know more about why you are asking.

[Grim]

Not in the right place?

Lukalee, I have just turned 38 recently. If I may take up a point of yours as it is quite significant for this topic. Roughly 2 months ago we introduced a new standby model where I would alternate 2 weeks on and 2 weeks off with another techie. To my obvious relief my habits have not changed, for the worst at least. Weekends/holidays are my challenge, the are my achilles heal! Exceptionally frustrating for me and those close to me, in particular my girlfriend who to all intents and purposes is out the door. Oh what twisted webs we weave whilst we practice to deceive. Anon.

[Grim]

Not in the right place?

Hello Louise, that is my sister's middle name and have alway liked it. Anyway, that aside.
I think what I am trying to puzzle here is simply, will the fact that I can and do abstain for the week with little or no effort, make the transition to total abstinence a little easier as the week consists of 5 days and the weekend 2. Sorry I should have been asleep an hour or two ago, so that is why my questions are not as concise as I would have wished being a newbie. I can comfortably say that I have a grim (pun intended) and may I say fierce determination to find a road to complete abstinence. I will continue reading and posting and hopefully adding value daily. Thanks everyone.

[brittzak]

Not in the right place?

Grim,
I too am a binge drinker. (although I do have a good bit of AF time now) To be perfectly honest, I think my fight to stop drinking has been just has hard as those that drink daily. I could go 3, 4, 5 days without a problem too, but BOOM when I did drink I would stay drunk for 2-3 days. It would take 3-5 days to recover from the 2-3 days I drank non-stop. I have had the bruises, the scraps, the aches I could not explain too. If you are anything like me, During the week, when I was most busy, I would be ok, but when the weekend hit and loneliness and/or boredom set in, I drank it away. SO, what you have to do is tackle it before is gets here. You need a plan of action. You need to be busy, you need to remove all alcohol from your home ...at least for awhile, maybe forever. I have tried to moderate...it will never happen in my world. If I could moderate I would have never became a binge drinker to begin with. I finally came to accept that.....not saying you are the same. Best of luck to you. Please do stick around!!!!!

[Grim]

Not in the right place?

Well it is with a fair amount of trepidation that I am about to leave work. So this will be my first weekend in a VERY long time without a good measure of red wine, that is the intention. At least I have plans for tonight to keep myself busy but a little nervous about tomorrow night 'cos at the moment will be home alone. Have some pressing editing deadlines looming so hopefully that will be sufficient to keep me "dry". Will keep the odd post coming in. I am really holding thumbs for weekend one. Regards, a nervous Graeme.

[42cat]

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Welcome, Grim. I'm not sure about the statistics, but just wanted to say hello. I wasn't a binger; I was an all-day-long "sipper", morning to night .. (I'm only 2 weeks sober, so still a newbie to sobriety after many years of a constant buzz (or middle-of-the-night anxiety until the next drink). I must say, sobriety is like a new, wonderful phase in my life and it has me looking so forward to my future ... which I haven't felt or done for years.

You have found a great site here ... keep on reading, and posting!

[louise]

Not in the right place?

Under "Just Starting Out" there is a thread for "Weekend Bingers" supporting each other through the weekend. You might want to hang out there some to help. Wishing you a sober weekend.