I know that many of you are sick of hearing about how my marriage of 21 years ended a few months ago. Although, the emotional part of my marriage was over a long time ago I am having a hard time dealing with the lose of my family life. My older son told me recently he wants to move a few hours away to go to school (and live with his girlfriend). I found out this week that the younger son (14) has plans to go with his Dad on a trip that will have him gone for a few weeks and leave me alone on my birthday. Seems like the whole family has fallen apart, but I guess it was over for awhile. Today I found out that my Mom will be having surgery tomorrow. I feel so helpless and far away. I'm in FL and she is on Long Island. I have been here for 19 years and she has never forgiven me for moving away (in a nice way). But I am feeling really bad about being here today. I thought about moving back to NY after the divorce but stayed here because of my kids. But now I feel like the kids don't need me as much and I should have thought about my Mom and being closer to my family. Feeling really sad today, but am glad to be sober today and hoping to get in a better frame of mind after my Mom's surgery. Any prayers would be appreciated!!
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Dealing with ALOT
Time2: Sounds like today it's hitting you hard. All the changes that you have made. I am sending thoughts and prayers for tomorrow to be a better day!
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Dealing with ALOT
Time, I am not sick of hearing your story -- in fact I don't remember you going on and on about it at all. I'm sorry you are feeling lonely. Life throws a lot at us at once, doesn't it? But at least you can take care of YOU, which you've already taken the first step toward by not drinking. Things will look up. And your kids will still need you, just in a different way as they get older. Hang in there, hon.Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
love you time and my prays are for you girl:beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Time2, sorry you are feeling alone tonight, you have gone through a lot lately, it is bound to take its toll. Dont make any big decisions yet, things may look brighter tomorrow, I hope so. You are in my prayers.Ethanol is a toxic chemical, why would I drink it?Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Time2...its good to hear whats going on with you. It sounds like its tough but you seem to be getting through it. As for your mom, you cant feel guilty about making the right decision for you. Dont let anyone preasure you into doing anything. Good luck..i will send happy thoughts.Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Awww time...... Prayers for you and yours. Your boys are growing up and it seems like you're the one with the growing pains. You're growing too, it's just uncomfortable at the moment. It won't always be like this. Your birthday is in 3 weeks, it's way too early to be fretting, but not too early to be planning for something YOU want to do! :l Let us know how your mom is getting along tomorrow.sigpic
Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUTComment
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Dealing with ALOT
Time I can only imagine you must be feeling a great sense of loss right now. Be patient my friend. I have just been reading a book called Companion of God by Dadi Janki and it's extremely uplifting to read some of the passages.
Companion of God - Google Books
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8Osse7w9fs[/video]]YouTube - David Gilmour Sonnet 18
Sending you, mom and kids my love and energy.
Peace be with you my dear friend.
Phil
xx"Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children." Kahlil Gibran
Clean and sober 25th January 2009
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Dealing with ALOT
Hi Time...
It's difficult, I know.
My ex struggled when our two left their home but I suppose it's all part of raising a family. She's still got her family close so I guess it's different for her. She misses the sounds of people doing their thing in the evenings. I must admit to a different attitude. I'm happy that they are grown and healthy and starting out on their own adventure. It's been rough at times but I love them and they know it and I'm just a phone call away.
I'll say a prayer for you and yours before I go to sleep.Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Prayers for your mom - and for you. It is very hard not being able to be there when someone you love is having surgery. Can you possibly go for a short trip?Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Time...I think what you are feeling is very normal. Divorce is very hard. It is a HUGE adjustment for anyone. I used to get so depressed when my kids went to their Dads for the weekend. What was I to do with my time??? They had been my TIME for so long. My daughter is starting to date and is off with friends all the time now. That is kinda sad. They grow-up. It is hard. It is time for you honey. I can imagine this is scarey as hell. You know you look forward to your children growing ,but then when they do...UH OH...could we strink them again??? Could you go visit your Mom?Forever loved, forever missed Papa BearComment
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Dealing with ALOT
You are all great friends. I wish I could be with my Mom tomorrow but I can not and it makes me very sad to realize I chose to live here. I know she does not understand why I moved away but I hope she forgives me. I will pray her surgury goes well and my sister will keep me informed.Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Time,
Just as your children are growing up...you grew-up and spread your wings too. Unfortunately, sometimes we can not always stay close to home. It would be nice, but it just does not always work out that way. It is not a betrayal of love...it is life. You don't love your Mom any less and your children do not love you any less....they are growing just as you grew. Life evolves....HUGS TO YOU and I am praying for you all!!!!Forever loved, forever missed Papa BearComment
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Dealing with ALOT
Hi time.
I can really feel your pain.
It must be really tough without your kids.
Stay strong.
My thoughts and prayers go out to you.Alcohol Free Since July 1 2009.
My Sobriety Blog (From Then Till Now).Comment
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Dealing with ALOT
Hey there. Wow, lots of changes and concerns for you lately.
Maybe you can try to look at things as a new phase for You, too. Change is not always easy, but it can be good, and it can be happy .. at least after the initial transition ... and especially once you have a plan in place on how you'll deal with kids going away, etc., and get your head around everything else. It will all come together.
Hope all goes well for your mom.AF for two years. Slight relapse. Working on it at the moment.Comment
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