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    #1

    Nora's journey

    Well, this is day 3 of my decision once again to stop drinking. When I sit and think about it ......it has been years of me saying this. Oh, I'll stop for a bit. Even a few months at a time. But......it's always the same. I start drinking again. I need to learn that I can not be the sociable drinker.
    So, here I am with two full days under my belt. I have started taking the Topamax again. I have ordered the Kudzu and I already had Milk Thistle and L-Glutamine. I'm going to start with that.
    I have started leaning on my best friend and my husband and son. I'm also going to learn to lean on my new friends here. I think that I have a hard time letting go and leaning on anyone so I lean on the alcohol. Who knows if that is even true or just one more twisted cop out in my brain.
    So.....here is the beginning of my change to a better life......................
    "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
    ..........
    AF - 7-27-15
    Tags: None
    #2
    Nora's journey

    Many of us are the caregivers, Nora, and dont give ourselves enough time and credit, or accept help graciously. This gives AL an easy 'in' since it makes us feel better, for a little while. Good luck on your journey.
    sigpic
    Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
    awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

    Comment

      #3
      Nora's journey

      Ruby - thanks for that. Sad thing is that this morning I was feeling my resolve weaken. So, I have hiked up my boot straps and dug in my heels again. That's why I started this little thread so I could really look at what I am doing to myself. I welcome any & all advise. I can tell that this is going to be a long and winding road.
      Thanks for being here on this journey with me.
      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
      ..........
      AF - 7-27-15

      Comment

        #4
        Nora's journey

        Hi Nora, its great that you are giving this a go.
        May I suggest that you write down in graphic detail if need be, all the reasons you want to quit? So go through your most horrific drunken experiences and how you felt hungover etc. Then to balance stuff out, write down what you would like your life to be like when you are sober.
        There is something about seeing the written word that is amazing for helping that resolve in tough times.
        All the very best..
        Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
        Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

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          #5
          Nora's journey

          Nora, one more bit of advice. My brother-in-law of 30 yrs passed away at 4:00 AM this morning. He was a quiet, peaceful man, but not at all industrious, and his goal each day was to get to the bar as soon as possible with enough money for the evening. I never saw him angry. I loved his humor. His 2 grown daughters had all but disowned him because he couldn't really understand why they were bitter over their neglected childhoods, when they never had vacations, or normal home lives, or a sober Dad. We joked he was crippled, since one hand always held a cigarrette, the other a can of beer. He was 1 of my Daddy's 2 son-in-laws, but the dead-opposite of my Hubs (a work-a-holic, super-provider) so the comparisons were terrible, and Daddy hated him. He left nothing but debts for his daughters, will have to be cremated with no wake to save money. Yet he was not a bad man. Just an alcoholic. Whatever our beliefs are about the hereafter, this is his legacy in this lifetime. Causes us to pause a moment, eh?
          sigpic
          Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
          awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

          Comment

            #6
            Nora's journey

            Starting - thank you......I do think that I need to sit and put down some thoughts. I don't have a wow-bam event. I think I need to start just writing and see where I end up. I think it will put a lot into perspective for me

            Ruby - WOW! Thank you for sharing that. I am sorry for your loss and that really hit home. I do want to be remembered for more than that.

            I can't wait to be home so that I can actually talk. I just keep sneaking on here at work.
            "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
            ..........
            AF - 7-27-15

            Comment

              #7
              Nora's journey

              Hi Nora, congratulations on your decision to lead a sober life. The people here at MWO will give you a helping hand on your journey. There is a great thread called "toolbox" that has some tips and tricks to help when your resolve weakens. Here is a direct link for you.

              https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

              It is located in the Monthly Abstinence section of this message board.

              Best of luck to you!
              vegan zombies want your grains

              Comment

                #8
                Nora's journey

                Oh Ruby .. that is sad. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your post really says a lot about those of us living the alcoholic 'lifestyle' .. and why we need to change it. Thanks so much for sharing.

                Nora .. Good advice above about writing out your thoughts and feelings. I do that as well as post here, and have read and re-read many times. Also, now would be a great time to make an in depth plan - you might want to write it out as well and add to it, or alter it, as the days go on. I use e-mail (I e-mail myself). Plan for times when you start feeling that it might be OK to have a drink, and plan for ways to change your routine a bit. Lay out your strategies and ideas in words, and then give some of them a try. Even little changes make a difference.

                Here's to a happy life!
                AF for two years. Slight relapse. Working on it at the moment.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Nora's journey

                  THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL OF YOUR ENCOURAGEMENT & TIPS TODAY. I am going to need every bit of it, I can tell.

                  So, in that vein, I am going to start babbling to myself here. Made it thru Day 3! Had some major cravings for awhile there. Actually....to be honest with myself - some of them weren't really cravings. Some were habits......some were reactions to stress......some were just because why not.
                  Going to try to break the evening/weekend habits. Those are my downfalls. Made a hair appointment for tomorrow night. Will be babysitting for the next 2 weeks straight starting Saturday. So, that is going to really help. Should really be over a lot of the initial cravings by the time the kids go home.
                  Ok - enough rambling for now. TIme to go check out the Toolbox and go meet some new friends!
                  "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                  ..........
                  AF - 7-27-15

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Nora's journey

                    Hi Nora
                    Well done on getting to day 3, you will make loads of friends here, they are all lovely people.
                    I think you will be fine, its funny when you finally make your mind up to do something then determination steps in, I am on day 17 and there is no know I am giving in now. You will go through some bad times but all the good times being A/F will out way them, so stick with us and we will see you through any difficult times
                    Good luck
                    :dancin: enguin:
                    starting over

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Nora's journey

                      Thanks Ronnie. Well......here I am beginning Day 4. Getting ready to get out of bed and get ready for work. Time to start a new day. I am so grateful that I found this group. The support here is so amazing. I actually feel pretty perky today. :H Let's hope that feeling lasts. Ok off to work and then I hope to check in on everyone.
                      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                      ..........
                      AF - 7-27-15

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Nora's journey

                        :goodjob:NoraC, good job on 3 days!! Stay strong through day 4 and you will feel so much pride tomorrow!
                        Dill

                        Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                        If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Nora's journey

                          Day 4 - really having some cravings today. Why - I do not know......
                          I can definitely tell the Topamax is back in my system. The Diet Coke tastes crappy again. I hate that. Dang it. Why am I having cravings?!?!!? I was having a good day. THings were looking bright & cheery.
                          WHY??????
                          "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                          ..........
                          AF - 7-27-15

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Nora's journey

                            Nora,

                            Remember, though, these cravings, while really tough to battle, are just thoughts.

                            You can deal with thoughts. You really can.

                            I am taking Baclofen for my cravings and it helps immensely. I was allergic to Topamax. However, I still get the thoughts. We have spent years doing everything with alcohol.

                            Once we get the poison out of our system, we are still dealing with the years of habits and means of dealing with everything by using alcohol. We have to retrain our thinking.

                            Chin up. Get past the cravings, you will, and start the process of retraining yourself to live life without the poison. You can!! If you keep giving into the cravings, you will not get to the retraining part.

                            I am going through the same feelings. I know what you are talking about.

                            I have learned to not feel badly about the cravings, just looking at them dispassionately for what they are. Simple thoughts that need to be diverted.

                            Stay strong. You can get through Day 4 and move on to Day 5 tomorrow.

                            Cindi
                            AF April 9, 2016

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Nora's journey

                              Thanks Cindi - you are right of course. I just needed to whine a little bit I guess. I made it just fine. I knew this wasn't going to be easy. But I chose to do this for ME. So - I am continuing. Here's to day 4 AF!!!!!

                              Thanks everyone for the support!!!!!
                              "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                              ..........
                              AF - 7-27-15

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