So, I am putting down this computer right now and I am going to go back to my book. I also might play a little Mario on the Wii or I'll work on my puzzle. I don't have to do so many things at once today. I can stop and do one thing. I was able to be on the computer so much because I could watch TV at the same time or flip from web site to web site or while I was looking at the computer, I could do something else. This evening, I can relax and lay down & read. What a fantastic feeling.
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Nora's journey
NoraC;999150 wrote: I had a great time yesterday and last night. I really had a wonderful time! I am reading a wonderful book. Yes - I AM READING A BOOK! That might not sound like much but to me it is a huge deal. I love to read and for the past year or more, I have not been able to quiet my brain to sit down and read. But, yesterday, I picked up a book (Thank you Grateful for sending me that book) and I was able to sit and read. I lost myself in the book. Oh that has made me so happy. I also started working on a jigsaw puzzle. I also sat and played a Wii game with my son. I did all these things. Oh my goodness......I am so thrilled. I am gaining my life back. I am finding myself.
So, I am putting down this computer right now and I am going to go back to my book. I also might play a little Mario on the Wii or I'll work on my puzzle. I don't have to do so many things at once today. I can stop and do one thing. I was able to be on the computer so much because I could watch TV at the same time or flip from web site to web site or while I was looking at the computer, I could do something else. This evening, I can relax and lay down & read. What a fantastic feeling.
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Nora's journey
Mishmash;999153 wrote: :sendinglove:
Oh Nora, you sound really happy and together today. I'm so happy for you. I'm not really able to settle at the moment and read, but I'm looking forward to it when I can. I've always found jigsaw puzzles very annoying. I've had no patience with them, which is probably the ADHD, but I'm actually considering getting one and giving it a go. Enjoy your book...:h
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Nora's journey
Nora...I gotta ask...what book are you reading??
You sound so good! I'm happy for you. Keep it up! :h:heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:
Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.
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Nora's journey
you sound....well...almost content!!!
Do you think it's 6 weeks with no booze?
Anti depressants?
all of the above??
whatever it is...I am happy for you dear friend
and yeah...whatcha' reading??I love my family more than alcohol.:h
Live in the Solution....not the problem
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Nora's journey
I'm reading Praying For My Life by Marion Bond West. After this I have two books that Fennel sent me that I have only read part of each. I am so excited to be reading again!!!
Mama - maybe both. They did increase my anti-depressants and he told me that it would help with my Anxiety & Depression. But, not being drunk really improves the reading."Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
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AF - 7-27-15
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Nora's journey
11-17-10
I decided to drink last night. I have been off the antabuse. I thought about it and decided to drink. I am not upset about my decision. However, if I find that I start wanting to drink and it is an issue, then I am going back on the antabuse. I do not want to go back to the way I was....always thinking about it. So, I will see how this goes."Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
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AF - 7-27-15
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Nora's journey
Thank you JC and Jan. I don't know if it's the right decision but I do know that I had to try it. So, I will go from here and see how it goes. If I can do his without obsessing about the next drink, then I'll be fine. If not, back on the antabuse."Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
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AF - 7-27-15
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Nora's journey
11-17-10 part 2
Yes Jan - I absolutely promise. I am happy now. I do not want to let that great feeling go. But, I do know that I need to try this - just to see for myself. I don't know if it will work.
I am happy to report that I have no desire to drink today. I am not sitting & plotting about my next drink. I do have to admit that it is in my head but that is just because I am thinking about it because of posting here.
If I start obsessing about the next drink and all of the 'shit' that goes on with that, then I will start on the antabuse again. I am not going back there. I have been doing really well in the past 2 months. I am feeling happy again. I am enjoying things again. So, honestly, alcohol doesn't have to be a part of my life. But, there was that little, tiny voice in the back of my head wondering if I would ever be able to drink again. So, the experiment has begun. This is my journey and I need to find out where I am going. This might be a detour to the wrong road but I have to travel it to get where I am meant to be.
I am now going to go read my new book. Unbearable Lightness by Portia De Rossi. Really good so far.
I will be keeping track here about my journey. Making sure that I am honest with myself. Thank you everyone for all of your support. It has helped me so much."Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
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AF - 7-27-15
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Nora's journey
Hi, Nora. Just wanted to say that I am so glad that you are feeling happy again and I can understand your "experiment". I know you'll be honest with yourself and you will know if moderating is for you or not. I'm happy to see that you are still reading, too. I hope you and your son and hubby have all been well.
Love & Hugs.Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
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Nora's journey
11-19-10
Well - back to the antabuse. It was worth a try but obviously not ready to live without the antabuse. I don't enjoy waking up with a hangover and I've got one today. So, I'm taking my pill with me to work and I will take it before I leave work today. Oh well..............."Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
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AF - 7-27-15
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Nora's journey
NoraC;1007073 wrote: Well - back to the antabuse. It was worth a try but obviously not ready to live without the antabuse. I don't enjoy waking up with a hangover and I've got one today. So, I'm taking my pill with me to work and I will take it before I leave work today. Oh well...............
I had a relapse the other day too. I think I've finally realized I just CAN'T drink. I had been slacking off on the Antabuse...but now I am back on it. I had a horrible hangover, and the whole experience was just not worth it. I'm sending you strength and love! :h
K9:heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:
Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.
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