Devastated

[Helensback]

Devastated

Hope

Hi Allie,

Just stopped in.

I remember when my dear grandmother was fighting cancer. She fought it many times in her life.

She told me that she never gave up hope. But then she said that the 'hope' had changed. Her hopes for herself changed into hopes for the people she loved.

She hoped that I would find peace and a sense of self that she knew I had never had.

She hoped that my little girl, who I named after her, would grow to be like me. God, I loved her for that.

She hoped that her memory would be sweet in my mind and nourishing to my soul.

She hoped that she would live in my heart and in my daughter's heart.

She hoped that I would let her go when the time came.

She hoped for grace and peace and the knowledge that we never truly die.

And she hoped for the same sense of acceptance for me.

Then she hoped that the china set she left me would survive just enough that my daughter could have at least one place setting for herself.

She died in 1999. I love her still.

I have hope for you and your mom, Allie.

Helen

[tawnyfrog]

Devastated

Oh the extraordinary power of a beautiful, well-placed and well-timed post.

:upset::upset: Thank you, Helen:upset::upset:

[gabby]

Devastated

I really love that as well Helen. Thankyou! gabby

[lushy]

Devastated

Thanks Helen

Made me think so much of my dear sweet Grandma who I miss dearly, and it helped me realize that we all have losses, that I am not alone in having lost all of my family at the young age of 39, and that we just have to deal with it, and dealing with it does not need to be with alcohol. Life is great but at the same time life is hard. It is how we choose to deal with it that matters. Now if I could just learn to deal with it in a healthy way.

[Allie]

Devastated

Helen,
There was one line that you wrote that you have no idea how special it is in light of my relationship with my Mom. It has something to do with a "bribe" I made to my Mom when she was trying to get me to take my nap when I was five years old. We still laugh about it today. You words reminded me.

Allie

[Allie]

Devastated

Hope

You have to have hope!! ( I printed your post. I know I will need it.) Thanx!!! Allie

[RoseKat]

Devastated

Allie, you in my thoughts and prayers, along with everyone else?s here. This is a strong community of people who share a common bond, a mutual battlefield, and your family?s current challenge will be shared by the community as well. Please keep checking in often to let us know how you are doing.

I know this is a difficult time for you, and thank God for the wonderful relationship you have with your mother. We aren?t all so lucky.

Love and hugs to you and yours.

:l
Kat

[Sunshine Brian]

Devastated

Allie- I am so very sorry to hear about your mother. She must be a wonderful woman because she has raised such a wonderful daughter. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Take care, and big hugs always- Brian

[vinophile]

Devastated

Allie,
My thoughts and prayers are with you, your mom and your family.
Janet

[YoungAtHeart]

Devastated

Hi Allie,

I'm so glad that Helen's words were helpful, because her Grandmom's words were so full of wisdom. I truly hope that your Mom will beat this thing, yet Helen reminds us all that our loved ones are truly with us forever in our hearts! Whatevere happens, with a Mom like yours, you are a winner. We will all pray for the best!

Love,
Kathy

[happycamper68]

Devastated

Thinking of you

Alliekins,
Just thinking of you and hoping you are having an ok day today. xoxoxoxoxo :l

[gabby]

Devastated

Hi Allie, Me too. You and this thread pops in my head during the day. Cant believe the connectiveness that exists here. I hope at this time you are goin through right now you can feel it. Big huge power hug comin your way. : ) gabby

[abby]

Devastated

sorry allie, about your terrible news. Remeber to live, love and laugh if possible.
abby

[Allie]

Devastated

Thank you Patty, Gabby and Abby and ALL of you!
I've been the queen of tears for the past few days and am sure my family is ready to see a smile again. I got to spend all day with Mom today and she is doing really well considering. She never complains or says one negative thing. We actually got to laughing really hard today because we were sitting in a restaurant at lunch (no, not Olive Garden Patty... LOL) and she asked me if I would look and see what was on her back as something was bothering her and felt itchy. I'm thinking... "Oh my God... another tumor or something." And so very discreetly I looked down the back of her blouse, and apparently one of the doctors had put some "marker" thing on her back for her bone scan and it looked like a darn perfume sample to me! So I pulled it off with tape and we just died laughing. (guess ya had to be there). But anyway, I am feeling in better spirits today after having the day with her. Her biopsy cannot get scheduled until Wednesday or Thursday of this upcoming week, so I am frustrated that she/ we have to wait so long to know the final diagnosis. In the meantime, I am choosing to put a smile on my face and enjoy each day with her to the fullest!

Thanks again for all of the love and support here.... you guys are truly awesome.

Much love and thanks to all of you,
Allie

[Going Strong]

Devastated

Allie!

Allie, I have been away and have only just started to catch up and I read about this. I am so sorry for you and your family. My mum is my rock and I know how it must be for you trying to be there for her! and also worrying about your kids as well.
My thoughts and heartfelt wishes are here for you
Love & Hugs