Over-spiritual husband

[Savannah]

Okay ladies and gentlemen, I need advice. My husband has me mindless. Why?? Everyday, I feel like a "sinner" because I'm an alcoholic.. My husband does not drink nor smoke and never has, he's just a high Christian.. Well, so am I, I just feel I have some work to do.. Please Help!!

[LilBit]

Over-spiritual husband

Hi Savannah, what's a "high Christian?" Please tell me it's not another way of saying that he's "morally superior," which is rather missing the point of being a Christian. I think any good Christian would admit to being a work in progress who still struggles with faults and sin and has a lot to learn. Hmm.... sounds to me like your self-description. Also, if he's judging you because you're an alcoholic, the Bible has a lot to say about that, too, doesn't it?

[DriftyAlison0]

Over-spiritual husband

According to my faith we are all sinners. Even your husband is a sinner. What God wants us to do is to try to not to sin as much as possible and live a life with him. That is what I believe and I try to live by that. But being a sinner I will sin and will continue to sin. The only one who is sinless is Jesus Christ.

[joerindge]

Over-spiritual husband

I was raised a christian and still consider myself so however after battling with addiction and going to so called "christian" treatment programs Ive become skeptical of the of how genuine many are and whether they have any understanding of the heart of christ. I recently read the most wonderful and revealing book about how God loves EVERYONE no matter what their struggles are the title is "The Raggamuffin Gospel I highly recommend it whether you have any interest in religion or not

[joerindge]

Over-spiritual husband

I used to be very self righteous and judgemental and was raised in a church that taught that all others were sinners However through my struggle with addiction I believe that God allowed me to come to understand that he loves all of us no matter what

[Tulipe]

Over-spiritual husband

Sav, sorry to say but he sounds like he's got a little superiority thing going on. It's a SIN to look down on others, I can tell you that, and if he's giving you that holier than thou treatment, well he's not very loving, is he?
Show your own strength, girl.

[Gold]

Over-spiritual husband

There's a difference between religion and being spiritual, although many people are both. To be spiritual in my opinion is to understand that we are all from the same source, call that, God, creator, whatever you wish. Therefore we are all connected, none is better or worse than another just on a different stage of the journey.

I do not believe in sin, I think that is something that was introduced into the scriptures by those who wished to maintain control over others. I do believe in free will, that is we all make choices and some choose in a way that is not good for their soul development, or for those around them.

God loves all of us, no matter what, the prodigal son is an example, and we have to first see ourselves as God sees us, and start loving ourselves first and foremost, then we are able to extend that love and understanding to others.

I certainly do not believe that abstension from alcohol, drugs, nicotine or any other substance or behaviour denotes a more spiritual or 'higher' person. I think a lot of people who use alcohol etc are extremely sensitive and intelligent people, and it begins as a buffer against a seemingly harsh world.

As long as we don't set out to deliberately hurt any person or animal and have respect for all living things, love as much as we can, then I think we are doing as well as we are able.

[JackieClaire]

Over-spiritual husband

Savannah,
There is a great quote from the Bible:
'He that is without sin among us, let him cast the first stone.'
Actually one of the nicest alcohols I know is a Catholic priest.

Jackie xxx

AF since 7/7/2009

[Savannah]

Over-spiritual husband

LilBit;697045 wrote: Hi Savannah, what's a "high Christian?" Please tell me it's not another way of saying that he's "morally superior," which is rather missing the point of being a Christian. I think any good Christian would admit to being a work in progress who still struggles with faults and sin and has a lot to learn. Hmm.... sounds to me like your self-description. Also, if he's judging you because you're an alcoholic, the Bible has a lot to say about that, too, doesn't it?

Right!! sometimes it's, okay maybe I am causing problems in our marriage, but then I think WTF, I work full-time and still support my family. He should be more grateful. Take me out to dinner sometimes, sometimes I don't want to have sex, I just want him to hold me. Is this too much to ask??

[LilBit]

Over-spiritual husband

Savannah;697921 wrote: He should be more grateful. Take me out to dinner sometimes, sometimes I don't want to have sex, I just want him to hold me. Is this too much to ask??

Apologies in advance to the guys, but generally speaking, it's been my experience that you have to hit the average guy over the head repeatedly with a sledgehammer to get them to do what you described on any sort of a regular basis. That said, it is important that you both get what you want and need out of your relationship. Are you able to communicate your needs to him?

[Elpis]

Over-spiritual husband

Savannah,

What faith does he practice? I ask because I might be able to offer specific suggestions or ideas if I know where he is coming from. In "another life" I was an ordained minister so I have some background in this area.

E-

[hippie37]

Over-spiritual husband

This is a great quote by Eleanor Roosevelt: No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

[Savannah]

Over-spiritual husband

:thumbs:Thank you all for your loving support! I believe my husband felt, he was trying to get his life together, so that meant, I had to follow. But now, we are both seeking help (I am so proud of him) not just with me, but with US and our marriage. God reigns on the just and the unjust and he knows my heart. Thank you again, guys!!

[Drunken Duncan]

Over-spiritual husband

Savannah

What you ask is not unreasonable I know it may be difficult but try to be patient

DD