I am now about 6 weeks AF. The physical side effects of AL withdrawal are gone along with the cravings. One of the strange things for me right now is I am not so sure I like being sober. Is that not the stupidest thing? I begged for sobriety for years! Well I am sober.
Now that I have been sober for a while, I am reminded of the things that encouraged me to drink in the first place. Relationships that were ok when I was drunk are not so great when I am sober. I kept that wanderlust in check with AL; now that AL is gone, I feel this desire to move on (wife, kids, job, and community would not benefit from my desire for change). The big plans I made while drunk are not so important now. How many times did I tell myself that, if only I was sober, I would do this? or that? Well I am sober and I don?t want to do what I wanted to do before. The playgrounds I used to frequent when drunk are not fun sober.
I don't know why I am writing. I don't expect anything. I guess I am just telling my story. I don?t know what it means - maybe nothing - but thanks for reading.
E-
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