Oh, The Irony ...

[want2Bsober]

Last night, I watched this documentary called "Rain In My Heart" (not for the faint of heart, but you can find it on YouTube) and it upset me so much, I exceeded my self-imposed daily limit. Dang. And I was doing so good, too :P

The irony of "needing a drink" (or three) to deal with the anxiety caused by the visual evidence and anxious worries over what drinking too much can do or may have already done is not lost on me ...

Back to square one for this kid :teeter:

[startingover]

Oh, The Irony ...

Hiya W2B.
That is a real gut wrenching doc isnt it? Did you catch the follow up? Mark is still sober but Vanda is drinking again.
I think it shows its never too late to give up and always to keep on trying. Here is the link if you want to check out the follow up.

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...ary-37717.html

[Boss.man]

Oh, The Irony ...

One of the insidious problems of alcohol is that it repeats an anxiety cycle. You drink to relieve anxiety. But when you detox, your anxiety increases to a higher level than before.

So when you look at the glass, recognize not that it will help you feel better, but that in the bigger picture, it will make you feel worse. For me, imaging is key to avoiding alcohol abuse. It's easier to avoid a bottle if you picture it as full of liquid anxiety, or liquid depression. For me, that's what it is.

Square one is a fine place to be. Just keep trying and keep striving to achieve your goal.

[Jandal]

Oh, The Irony ...

Thanks Sober - I just checked out 4/10 on YouTube and was riveted. Will check out the rest now.

I wonder how many of us would just stop if we had a transparent body and could see what the booze is doing to us on the inside??

[Cathy40]

Oh, The Irony ...

Hey Want....it was supposed to stop you! brush yourself off, get back on here, and start anew! You don't want anyone doing a documentary on you now, do you?

[brightlite]

Oh, The Irony ...

Want2Bsober,

Hard documentary to watch. Scares the hell out of ya!

Boss Man...speaking of imagery. I try not to romantize a glass of wine. However, it is shown everywhere in images of people fine dining and on TV ...etc. Anyway, I image that a glass of white wine is pee and a glass of red wine is blood (I know, I know...Catholic here). Really though, Catholic or not....who really wants to drink a glass of Blood! I may be an alcoholic, but I'm not a Vampire!

[want2Bsober]

Oh, The Irony ...

Wow ... Some really great comments and food for thought here. I really can't thank you enough ... I definitely landed in the right spot at the right place with you all Every single comment here hit the bull's eye. Fantastic. Thank you!!

Caved and went to the $$$ doctor who said 1) quit drinking wine (dumbass really thinks it's that easy?), 2) told me I didn't look well then treated me like a silly hypochondriac woman, and 3) prescribed me Xanax. So I read the package insert and seeing as how I already have almost ALL the side effects before ever taking even one pill (which is why I went to the doctor in the first place), I am wondering how the bloody hell am I supposed tell if I'm having side effects to the med?

Fired the doctor, tossed the script, loaded up on purified water, sushi, fruits/veggies for juicing, SAM-E, 5-HTP, B stress tabs, Korean ginsing, probiotics, ginger for tea, melatonin, DHEA, Emergen-C and I spent the better part of the afternoon crafting a diet/detox plan for the next six weeks. Wish me luck I feel like David going up against Goliath, but hey, I seem to recall he won in the end ...

Love & Hugs

pS I found another doctor but he is so booked, I can't get an appointment until January :P Until then, I will be relying on my most excellent acupuncturist who is probably the main reason I am still alive.

[Pan]

Oh, The Irony ...

Luck wishes from me.

[aliame]

Oh, The Irony ...

Have only been able to watch half so far. Only able to because is so scary, as it's meant to be, I know. Totally appreciate the irony Want, it gets me like that too.
Will watch rest later, without glass...I hope.

[Jandal]

Oh, The Irony ...

Thanks again Sober - I really owe you one today - best luck and wishes, but I know you'll do it! :-)

[Shikakai]

Oh, The Irony ...

I'm with Cathy on this! Try and TRY again... just don't STOP trying... that is when the true horror starts

I've never seen that movie... I will look for it.

[redhibiscus]

Oh, The Irony ...

Want2besober,
Good idea not taking the Xanex. Obviously the doctor you went to does not understand people with alcohol issues. Xanex and alcohol are deadly, and it really scares me when I hear people being given strong tranquilizers when they have alcohol problems.

Your ideas, and solid plan are a recipe for success on your AF journey. I am on day 27, this time around, and eating healthy and taking care of myself have made all the difference. Listening to my gut, and acknowledging my inner wisdom have helped me on this road. Positive thoughts sent your way.

[brightlite]

Oh, The Irony ...

Way to go Wants... for being pro-active and making your own plan. It sounds like a good one. I take most of those supplements. No probiotics though, might need to get some.

Red, you must be feeling great by now! 27 days and eating healthy.