Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

[Heavenly]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Doggygirl;744410 wrote: hdb, I'm at peace with the fact that I HAVE to be AF.

DG, you have really said everything here ... It's finding or feeling that ''peace'' within yourself that you HAVE to be and will continue to be AF .....

Doggygirl;744410 wrote: True "normies" DO NOT CARE one way or the other about alcohol. I know because I am married to one. He can have "A" beer (as in ONE) if he chooses. Usually he chooses not to. Me? I actually thought about this one time, and I cannot recall EVER having only one drink since I had my first at about 16 or 17 years of age and I'm 51 now. It's either zero, or too many for me, unfortunately.

If there is ever something invented that would truly turn me into a normie, I would get in line in a heart beat I think. As it is, I finally had enough of fighting it.

Strength and hope to you,

DG

Me too, my OH can go for years without drinking and then have 2 in an evening out and not even finish them (whereas I would have had 2 in 2 minutes....) ... Yes, it's not fair ... it will never be fair, but the same as people have illnesses that come from nowhere ..... it's not fair for them but it just ''is'' ..... we have no choice if we have that predisposition .... thanks DG for clarifying this so well .....

[shirazgirl]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Hi ...
I actually thought about this post for a few days and tried to come up with an analogy that some people could relate to. For me, this was it.

Seven years ago I quit smoking. I was quite the champion, but I knew it would eventually kill me. I made the decision to quite. AT NOT TIME, did I ever consider "moderating" w/ my cigarettes. I didn't quit with the idea, maybe after 3 months, I could have a few. When I quit, I knew it was all or nothing.

Now, al is definitely an addicition (nicotine was worse for me as I was physically addicted to that, but not al). So why wouldn't I think that it would be the same thing? I have never heard of anyone quitting cigs and moderating, so why would I quit al and tried to moderate.

I knew that if I smoke again, I most likely would eventually end up where I began. As time went on, I forgot about how strong the addiction was. About a year and a half a go, I was away on vacation and was having my wine. I thought to myself, one cigarette wouldn't hurt, I had five years under my belt. Certainly, I must have this under control by now. Well, one led to another to another to another and finally the addiction voice was back in my head, picking up just where it left off. Five years down the drain (not completely, there was some health benefits, but mentally,,, aaarrrgghhh).

Conclusively, I still smoke. I do not try to moderate (I only smoke about 6 a day, but I am a workout feind and it hurts me). I do plan to quit though (one addiction at a time) and have no plans of moderating, because I simply don't want to. I want the evil little things out of my life.

I think that this is the same exact thing as alcohol. An addiciton is an addiction is an addiction. We have no control once we start because we are addicted. We may be fooled into thinking that we can (as I was w/ the smokes), but the truth of the matter is why would we want to?

I hope this makes as much sense to you as it did me while I was thinking about it (in my spin class at the gym, I guess I should really be paying more attention). Hope this helps.

[1967]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Really great post and valid points.
Thanks!

[keeta]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Hdb,
Thank you for starting such a great thought provoking thread!

I can't drink. I am an alcoholic. When I drink, I become a person I don't like. That person is not me. I drink to black out, I drink to pass out. I become a blue, sad, depressed mess of a woman who in this last two years even pondered thoughts of suicide. I don't think I would have ever done it, atleast not while sober. But I was so desperately sad when drunk (and still somewhat coherent(sp?) ) that I just wanted out. The way out was to stop drinking. Simple right???? NO! Wrong. It was hard. Almost impossibly hard. For an entire year after joing MWO I couldn't string more than two days AF together. I was angry I couldn't be normal drinker. I couldn't be a happy drunk. I couldn't stop at 2, or 5, or 10 drinks. It was a battle. One I never want to repeat. The only way to avoid that battle, is to never take that first drink.

For me, like you describe...it would be the obsessive thoughts...I would always be thinking about when I could drink next. And inbetween drinks I would be fighting the urge TO drink. Eventually my alcoholism would win and I would be back to drinking to passout again.

I guess this means I could never ever mod. My idea of moderating, is totally take it or leave it. Like DG describes her husband.
I have always drank too much. I have never had a normal relationship with alcohol. Ever. I have no clue how to, or even what living a life of moderation in terms of alcohol IS.



Only you can know if you are a candidate for moderating. Only you know your true thoughts and true relationship with AL. I know it is hard to imagine life without drinking. I have felt that way. Today I am grateful to be aware that I can avoid all the turmoil by not restarting the cycle of drinking.
Best of luck no matter what you choose.

XO,
K

[hdb]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Thank you all

Good analogy shirazgirl, I haven?t ever smoked but as you say I have never seen a smoker trying to moderate! Keeta, doggygirl and heavenly ? I am pretty sure I will end up full time AF, I do however have to give it one more try ? not yet maybe after Christmas, maybe later but I know I will have to try once more.
I can?t live with constant obsessing (which I do not have now ? but that?s maybe because I know I will attempt modding one more time?), I do know that I am not willing to spend a life time obsessing it?s enough to send you stark raving bonkers! Plus it totally gets in the way of things that are way way way more important ? like my two children and husband, career, friends..... if alcohol was a human we would never have it anywhere near our family or friends would we??.... if alcohol was a human it would be the nicest person you ever met until it was sure it was your best friend then it would show its true colours as a two faced, sneaky, selfish, lazy liar!! WHY would I want a relationship with someone like that??? I am a fiercely independent (family say too independent for my own good) strong woman ? how did I ever fall in love with such a fickle substance ? it started as a friend, someone to help me through a tough career whilst raising two young kids on my own, it put its arm around my shoulder through my marriage break up, it held my hand through the loss of my young brother and supported me and in turn helped me support my Mum with cancer (thankfully now in remission).

Anyway ? I will give it one more chance to be my friend and not my foe, I wouldn?t give anything this many chances (apart from my beautiful children who have their mothers complete and unconditional love of course) but this is my last, it?s got to be.

Thanks for listening to my waffle xx

[Guitarista]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Time will tell you in no uncertain term's, Hdb. Just be safe, responsible, and look after yourself. To hear you say.....'i wouldn't give anything this many chances', rings alarm bell's from here, but only you know, and only you can find out.

Best wishes, and take care.

[sailor girl]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Normally, I just read and not post anything. I usually read what i want to say which would be a lot of repeating....but this really hit home for me. I am sitting at work today with a huge hangover. I actually just told my coworkers that my daughter was sick and I had to leave....pathetic? I know. Modding isnt an option for me. It is sooooo stressful. It's all or nothing with me. The biggest reason I try to modify is because my husband and friends are normal and drink like normal people. I want to be like them!!!!!!! But I can't. We went out Saturday night.......I stopped drinking last night. That's not normal. I think you are not weak but incredibly strong. I can't imagine having 27 days under my belt.

[savon19]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

The only time I can "mod" is if I'm at a social function or meeting a friend. (And that's RARE!) I can mod in those situations, because I am SO fearful of drinking & driving!!

But I Definitely can't mod at home. If I buy AL for home, I drink it... ALL.

So, for me, going AF means NOT buying it! Simple, huh? Wellll, it is unless I get that "wild hair"...!

Already Almost got that today - Day 4. Probably my weakest day... Hangin' in.

[hippie37]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

I'm still waiting to see a post from a successful modder to the original question!lol

[Guest]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

keep hugging that tree Hippie!

[sailor girl]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

I know right? I think the "no answer" is the answer. Damn, I was hoping for someone to say how easy it is to mod

Modding is like seeing Elvis.......not gonna happen.

[mario]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

just looking at your avator sailor girl,just wondering which one are you

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

hippie37;744930 wrote: I'm still waiting to see a post from a successful modder to the original question!lol

So is everyone who posts in either the Monthly moderators or Long Term Moderators sections of MWO in denial, in your opinion then Hippie?

[Long Road]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

I'm a Alkie. I can't mod

[sailor girl]

Has modding truly worked for anyone? Truly?

Mario, The girl