Not looking forward to xmas

[Sweetgum]

Hi all

Some of you may remember that my sister's 2yr old son died suddenly of meningitis on Boxing day 2008. This whole year has been a sad, pain filled blur for my family. I am finding it so very hard to get 'in the mood' for christmas and it's not fair on my kids. I am snappy, weepy and moody and i know come boxing day it will be so tempting to just blot everything out with AL. I dont want to because I need to be sober. I'm just getting scared. As xmas get's closer i'm getting more anxious and upset.

Thanks for listening xxx

[akgirl]

Not looking forward to xmas

My heart goes out to you. :l So sorry for your families loss.


This can be a very hard time of year for a lot of folks for a lot of reasons. I can be very Ba-humbug at times too. I use Theanine and Be Calm when I get really anxious or moody. It seems to help.

Take care of yourself.
:l
Ak

[Wagoneer]

Not looking forward to xmas

Sweetgum - I understand what you are going through. I feel the same way. My brother in law died suddenly at 42 (three kids 3-16) and it has devastated us. We buried him the day before Thanksgiving just a few weeks ago and the holidays have been so hard. I have been AF for a few days so far after diving head first into a vat of Cabernet after his death. It is hard, but so much harder drinking to deal with this. It is hard enough on the family and my kids - they don't need a buzzed mom on top of it. Grief is so tricky. Hits you when you least expect it, at least it does me. I will be fine, then all the sudden be a weeping mess. And that is without AL. I am so sorry to hear about your loss, devastating. Bless you and your family and I wish you strength through this hard time. Try your best to stay AF - you will have clarity and strength that you cannot believe after years of being robbed of it by AL. Keep posting and know you are among friends.

K