Why Do You Drink?

[TranqWilly]

Why Do You Drink?

Some fascinating discussion, and it's had me thinking (uh oh!). Here's another angle...

I'm on the fence with the disease issue, but that question isn't that important to me.

If it's a disease, or inherited, there's no medical cure or it's encoded in our dna - and guess what? We can't change that!

If it's a matter of conditioning, environment, trauma or whatever's happened in the past - guess what? We can't change that either!

It manifests the same either way - the problem we all have to deal with right now is out of control drinking.

The only influence the past, our alchoholic 'germs' or our dna has on the present lies only in the power we give it. If we believe we're doomed because we have a disease -- or doomed because of the hell we've lived through, then maybe we're doomed; at least until we wake-up.

But if we leave all that behind, take it as a challenge or as a random quirk of life, and choose to move forward by not drinking then the 'cause' really doesn't matter.

Yes there may be psychological problems, or inherited tendencies that hit our triggers and make it difficult, but drinking more isn't going to help either way.

Logic or emotion? I think you have to get over the emotional part before you can see the logic. Kind of like being in a 'bad love' - it doesn't stop until you really understand what you're doing by letting those emotions run your life. I'm guessing that there's is real value in understanding the emotional needs that are being fed (back to the original 'Why' question).

Just my two cents - a small price for some good knowledge, and entertainment.

Take care.
tw

[Doggygirl]

Why Do You Drink?

Suni;789046 wrote: Hi Doggygirl,

It's true, logic doesn't seem to apply to addictions. I was once addicted to a guy (thought we were in love but I was in addiciton-he was who knows where) Looking back I cannot believe how deluded I was. Like it just could not have been me. I did things that make me cringe now but I did them all willingly and believing everything was meant to be!
Ha!! So I can identify with the stove very well.
And yet it was a logical decision that made me stop drinking-though I was addicted.
My logic was "I am not going down this road that leads to destruction" and I walked through the threshold of the door vowing never to return.

Did you finally reach a point where you accepted, 100%, that you cannot safely drink? That was "logical" for me considering all the negative consequences that I experienced as a result of drinking. I finally DID get there, with a little help from MWO and AA. For me though, I did the illogical thing of "sticking my hand on the stove" many, many, many, many times before I finally "got it." Lots of insanity for me prior to reaching the logical conclusion.

And then it has not been as simple for me as "well, I can't drink so I just won't." For me, it has taken a lot of effort to change the old habits and restructure a very broken way of living. To those who DO experience an easy transition between over-drinking, a moment of clarity realizing that's not a good idea, and contented sobriety, my hat is off to you. Observation (which is limited - I have not been sober very long!) suggests that for most people, traveling that path is not always easy.

DG

[Suni]

Why Do You Drink?

Did you finally reach a point where you accepted, 100%, that you cannot safely drink?

Hi there,
I reached a point where I knew I was deluding myself and that nothing would change unless I made it change. Plus, one evening I was out with my husband and ordered a second bottle becuse I hadn't had enough. I never want to see that look on his face again. So, to answer your question -it was a moment of clarity followed by a moment of deep shame that compounded my decision.

[Virgil]

Why Do You Drink?

Hi Folks,

Over the last few months, I have identified four reasons why I drink and they are:

Pleasure
Anxiety
Sedative
Habit

Dealing with each of these, in turn. I find that alcohol can increase the pleasure I get from certain activities and, in particular, listening to music. Secondly, anxiety. This is almost certainly the main reason I drink as I have both obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). I find that alcohol can help to prevent anxiety and reduce anxiety after an anxiety-provoking trigger. Thirdly, alcohol has a sedative effect and this helps to prepare me for going to bed. This is very important for me as I don't like going to bed for reasons that I don't fully understand. However, I normally experience restless sleep, which I equate to unpleasant dreams. Finally, habit. There are definitely times when I do this and, on the face of it, it seems so pointless - but I still do it.

So, those are my reasons for drinking. No wonder I find it difficult to stop/reduce my alcohol intake!

V.

[ready2change]

Why Do You Drink?

And then it has not been as simple for me as "well, I can't drink so I just won't." For me, it has taken a lot of effort to change the old habits and restructure a very broken way of living. To those who DO experience an easy transition between over-drinking, a moment of clarity realizing that's not a good idea, and contented sobriety, my hat is off to you. Observation (which is limited - I have not been sober very long!) suggests that for most people, traveling that path is not always easy.

Exactly my sentiments DG. Often times I allow myself to feel like a "failure" and I stay away from MWO because I am not one of the "fortunate" ones who just has a light bulb moment and declares that because it doesn't make sense for me to continue drinking, I will just stop. For ME, it's way more complicated than that. No excuses, no justification...but no one here knows of the extents I have gone to for sobriety that have not always been my saving grace. Suni, I could give you a million "ah ha" moments in my life that were preceded by "I'll never drink again". And although I am totally for positive thinking and thoughts become things...just thinking I'm never going to pick up a drink again has not worked for me yet no matter how many times I may burn my hand on that stove.

But, again, I will NEVER give up....I'm just one of the slower learners and I'm okay with that.

[TsHope]

Why Do You Drink?

Looks like a good place to start?

:thanks:I am learning how to navigate here now. Thank you for all the wonderful and kind words and thanks for the welcome. I posted this as well on Newbys Nest as that is where I started. This looks like a good place for me to keep posting for a bit at least. Today I am heading into Week 4 again. I got just a few days short of 3 months last try and am determined this time to beat that and maybe beyond. One day at a time.
Still sorting through things here and in my life. Seems I have a ball of tangled yarn and need to work it all out now that I am not running to a bottle to hide in it. So much to sort through. I am taking it one room at a time in my life. (If that makes any sense?) Doing a little here and there but working on my own self is the biggest thing. How I can change so others will change how the react to me. Learning assertive skills instead of aggressive, an art in itself. Tools to do that are coming from the counseling. Hard work and allot of looking at me and where it all comes from. It is more at this point, what is in my box and what I can do and not what everyone else can do. If I change then they may. At least how they or I let them treat me. I am being more reflective with folks in my life, when they are dumping on me now I just repeat what they say and then let them answer themselves. I am not trying to fix the world anymore just myself. I can't help what other people do is my new saying. Practice will make perfect or at least livable right? I am not as strong as some may think but not as weak as I once thought I was. Still it is a roller coaster ride. Just hanging on and trying to get up and do the best I can with me everyday and as someone on here said and has the quote, (excuse me for not knowing to many names yet) Looking for myself sober. Comes from my most favorite inspiration song from Pink. I listen to it all the time. Also one from the Killers, It's gonna hurt sometimes. I just keep pressing on and seems I have found some new and wonderful friends here to help me and I will try and help them too if I can in some way? Attitude is everything and I am trying to get a good one. Thanks for being here for me and again, thanks for the wonderful replies. I will talk to you all soon. Until then, keep your shields up and stay strong.
My respect,
T:h:l

[LittleErn]

Why Do You Drink?

Why do you drink?

I just don't know why I drink. I go for days at a time alcohol free and the slightest trigger, be it sadness or elation sets me off again. I am reaching rock bottom, the lowest I have been. I've let people down, humiliated myself and others. I've been the meanest person around and I can't take it anymore. I'm too proud to kill myself so I have to face up to the fact I can't drink like a 'normal' person. Every time I pick it up the detox becomes harder, the panic increases and my mood declines further. I know I've hurt so many people because of my actions and I've alienated almost everyone I know. I just want to be sober, lose the egocentric behaviour and get on with the rest of my life. Some days I feel like I need to be instituionalised for my own safety but the thought of taking such a step fills me with dread. I have managed to stay sober for 18 months months last time I did a proper detox in a supportive environment but it was damn expensive (about $800 a day) I know I can get off the drink, but how to fill the space it vacuums up? One day at a time I suppose, and that's quite frustrating for someone who wants instant results. I'll never find God or religion so I have to make my own plan for change. It's reassuring to know that I'm not the only person who is afflicted with alcoholism and I intend to visit this community regularly to pick up any advice and support and also to reach out to other who may be facing up to their demons for the first time. Chin up everyone, for better must come. Thanks all at MWO.:thanks:

[Angelcakes]

Why Do You Drink?

Just wanted to say Hi & welcome TsHope & LittleErn.
Keep posting & reading, reading & posting...it's a journey.

:welcome:

xo