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    Saved by the bottle...

    The BIG bottle, no less... life works in strange ways sometimes...

    After 6 months of really very little 'real' temptation (I mean, yes, a fleeting thought is there now and then - but usually something that can be shooshed off with a head shake) I had a pretty rough couple of weeks - just life happening. Anyways, after all this time, I suddenly actually considered getting a bottle of wine. Not just the fleeting thought.. no, a fully formed thought, not impulse, either.

    It went as far as standing in front of the wine rack at the store... seeing that the bottle I was planning on getting wasn't there. But the bigger version (1.something litres) was there and on sale. I looked at it and shook my head "Yeah, right. I buy the big bottle and drink it ALL. No thanks."

    Phew. I keep wondering if I actually HAD gotten the smaller bottle if it had been there. I'm not sure. I'm really not sure. All I know is that I'm eternally grateful it was NOT there. And that I did not get anything.

    And, I do NOT like that thought, fleeting or otherwise. Really need to keep my guard up.
    Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

    Winning since October 24th, 2013

    #2
    Saved by the bottle...

    :goodjob:I'm happy for you Sunshine...Well done.
    "When she enjoyed her drinking she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it." (from The Big Book)

    Comment


      #3
      Saved by the bottle...

      Well done. A reminder that no matter how long it has been we need to stay on guard for the times when we think we have AL beat. Glad you did not forget to keep your guard up.

      Comment


        #4
        Saved by the bottle...

        woo hoo! Big victory! Rock on!
        sigpic
        Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

        Comment


          #5
          Saved by the bottle...

          No, this was lucky circumstance..... not my victory. Which really bothers me.

          Seems I'm not nearly as far along in recovery as I thought
          Okay, WHO put a stop payment on my reality check?

          Winning since October 24th, 2013

          Comment


            #6
            Saved by the bottle...

            Good going GG. Glad the little bottle wasn't there.
            Wally22:confusedmonkey::confusedmonkey::confusedmo nkey:
            If I don't want to brag but I can still wear the earings I wore in highschool
            November 2, 2012

            Comment


              #7
              Saved by the bottle...

              Way to go. I think it was a victory no matter HOW it happened.

              Does anyone else on this board who is currently abstaining have NIGHTMARES about letting yourself go on a binge?

              Comment


                #8
                Saved by the bottle...

                Wow, you went in and left without anything... wow!! I can't wait to be able to do that! I think I would have rationalize the bigger bottle, I could cook with it, keep the rest in the fridge for that...
                You went in and came back out with nothing.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Saved by the bottle...

                  sunshine_gg;806275 wrote: No, this was lucky circumstance..... not my victory. Which really bothers me.

                  Seems I'm not nearly as far along in recovery as I thought
                  I understand these feelings completely but I think you're being a bit hard on yourself. You DID walk away, and that reaffirms your sobriety to your brain and reinforces your new, healthy behaviours.

                  I think it's not uncommon to stand and face "the enemy" occasionally, even if it's just because we're curious about something that once held such power over us.

                  (Maybe reassess your support systems/stress outlets for when things are going badly. Make sure you have enough sandbags around you to weather the storm.)
                  sigpic
                  AF since December 22nd 2008
                  Real change is difficult, and slow, and messy - Oliver Burkeman

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Saved by the bottle...

                    Well done Sunny, but as you say, you would've bought that bottle and drank it. Marshy makes good sense, and this very easily could've been back down the gurgler for you and your life, and perhap's, never to return. Be careful, and i am so glad you didn't buy a bottle.

                    'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                    Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Saved by the bottle...

                      great to hear!

                      That was good thinking and luck!! I probably would have bought the big bottle (except I am not a wine drinker, usually..........not by the bottle anyway)...................very happy for you Sunshine!!!:goodjob:

                      lots of love,:l:h

                      MA:l:h
                      :rays:My happiness is my greatest gift to others:rays:eace:

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Saved by the bottle...

                        sunshine_gg;806275 wrote: No, this was lucky circumstance..... not my victory. Which really bothers me.

                        Seems I'm not nearly as far along in recovery as I thought
                        I also think you are being too hard on yourself GG. That is not "luck" that was will power!
                        Celebrate this victory!!
                        :goodjob:
                        "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Saved by the bottle...

                          Sunshine,
                          Thanks so much for your post. It reminds us that we are ALL just one drink away from being back to where we were, losing control, blacking out, hurting ourselves and others, feeling sick, horrible anxiety, guilt, shame, and maybe not being able to start again. Being AF is life and I can tell with you Sunshine, that it has changed your life to be AF in every way.

                          I am amazed that you didn't get the bigger bottle, after all, why not? Who doesn't love a good deal? But it might just be a miracle that you decided since what you wanted was not there, you did not make the purchase. Yes, a miracle. Stay strong and please keep posting.
                          Redhibiscus
                          ______________________________

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Saved by the bottle...

                            temptation

                            sunshine_gg;806261 wrote: The BIG bottle, no less... life works in strange ways sometimes...

                            After 6 months of really very little 'real' temptation (I mean, yes, a fleeting thought is there now and then - but usually something that can be shooshed off with a head shake) I had a pretty rough couple of weeks - just life happening. Anyways, after all this time, I suddenly actually considered getting a bottle of wine. Not just the fleeting thought.. no, a fully formed thought, not impulse, either.

                            It went as far as standing in front of the wine rack at the store... seeing that the bottle I was planning on getting wasn't there. But the bigger version (1.something litres) was there and on sale. I looked at it and shook my head "Yeah, right. I buy the big bottle and drink it ALL. No thanks."

                            Phew. I keep wondering if I actually HAD gotten the smaller bottle if it had been there. I'm not sure. I'm really not sure. All I know is that I'm eternally grateful it was NOT there. And that I did not get anything.

                            And, I do NOT like that thought, fleeting or otherwise. Really need to keep my guard up.
                            hi sunshine,yes we really need the feeling to reassuer oursslves we can manage our lifes,its not funny how many times ive done the same,told the wife i want it in the house,so i can offer the guests a drink,hahaha,beer,whisky and yes the old clear stuff tht no one can smell,vodka,lol,i beleive one day in every heavy drinkers or alchoholics life we come to admit it,we cant do it,i , like you havent yetdam were northerners,lol almost like being irish in canada,hahaaha,this the true me,energetic,happy,why would i or you want anything less,,i dont go to the outlits much, lol i dont even no how to spell liqoir hahaha,and ive been drinking for 30 some odd years ,isnt tht odd,i do apoligise for ramblin,i say it to many,your a good ciber friend,it will always be there why tempt yourself,i live with normal drinkers,am i fortunate,i make wine for my wife,i have 100 bottles of white wine in the house,the boose store is down the street,who am i to tell you not to,if it helps you remain sober,do it,just dont buy it and youll remain sober for one more day,remember you special gyco:goodjob::thankss if it werent folks like my sobriety would be worth nothing

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Saved by the bottle...

                              o i seen the thread the other day for chat my comp wont let me enter says to many viruses

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