new 30 day thread???

[cowgal]

Cannot find the old one anywhere and I miss u, Britzak, TIT, More2, Greenie...............everyone who is attending this big ole divorce party, I really really hope it happens, part of what motivated me to do this difficult, bank breaking, rollercoaster ride from hell!!!:upset:

I am having a hard time right now w/ al................I want to drink soooooooooo bad even tho it just almost killed me!!!!! I know, crazy but all these feelings I am dealing w/ are difficult................want to talk, hope someone chimes in!!!

lots of love,:l:h

Need a huge hug,:l :l

MA

[greeneyes]

new 30 day thread???

MA! :l:h:l You hang tight!!! You WILL get through this. It IS hard, but it is WORTH it!! You were literally given your life back. Don't even think about abusing that gift with a drink!! Get those big girl pants on!!! Look at that cowgal update thread and see how loved you are! Thank goodness you are getting out of that loveless abusive relationship - close that door behind you and lock it! :l:l

[time2change]

new 30 day thread???

Can I jump on this thread too? I hope since I already did.
I just want to say ditto to Greenie. Go back and reread that Cowgal Update thread again and again if you need to.
Remember that this is a rollercoaster ride but the ride will come to an end and you will find yourself in a safer, more peaceful place than when you started. Please remember how great you feel when you are AF. AL will not help anything. Be strong!!!

[sunshine_gg]

new 30 day thread???

MA, honey.. :l

It must seem like hell right now... but you will get through it! And Greenie is right.. BIG GIRL PANTS! Or.. in terms you'll understand... the SUNDAY BREECHES!

Gotta run out right now but will be back later... PM anytime. And hang in there!

[Doggygirl]

new 30 day thread???

Hang in there Cowgal. Drinking won't fix anything, but you already know that. Drinking can only make things worse, and I know you already know that too.

Another fan of the BGP's....

DG

[more2life]

new 30 day thread???

Hey,

I was going to send you a PM this afternoon. I was starting to get worrierd, because I haven't seen you post anything for a few days. Going AWOL is totally unacceptable.

The rollercoaster ride is hell, but you have proven to all of us how strong of a woman you are. You WILL get through this!!

How are the boys? Anything new going on with your website and artwork? You are loved very much MA, keep posting here.

M2

[greeneyes]

new 30 day thread???

MA, you had mentioned follow up counselling and had some names - how's that going?

[cowgal]

new 30 day thread???

hey all

post daily on the ass in gear thread, just working and trying to sleep and stay af and eat.............sorry I started out so depressed sounding, doing ok, good to see everyone here, thanks for your support, this ride is ok today, but I am here at work............so that is a sorta saving place, it is 2 am so in 6 hours going back to bed and then work tomorrow night..........then off 3 days, plan on enjoying and riding..........yay!!!!

love you guys, will pm u if needed, thanks all!!!:thanks:

xoxoxoxo:l :h :l

MA

Big britches on!!!

[gyco]

new 30 day thread???

thanfullness

cowgal;808306 wrote: post daily on the ass in gear thread, just working and trying to sleep and stay af and eat.............sorry I started out so depressed sounding, doing ok, good to see everyone here, thanks for your support, this ride is ok today, but I am here at work............so that is a sorta saving place, it is 2 am so in 6 hours going back to bed and then work tomorrow night..........then off 3 days, plan on enjoying and riding..........yay!!!!

love you guys, will pm u if needed, thanks all!!!:thanks:

xoxoxoxo:l :h :l

MA

Big britches on!!!

hi cowlady,just to be where you are is a blessing,cow im not a councillor or nothing,one of the things ive learned over the years ive lived,ive loved everyone else but me ,i thot i did,,i had to lern how to love and do for me,i guess that is one of the reasons i drank,when i hurd of your delema,i cant say i said a prayer,maybe in my subconcious mind i did,at that time somthing was taking care of you,filling your time in with other things i beleive is the answer,until we figure that one out,we are at hi odds,we will drink again,good luck gyco

[cowgal]

new 30 day thread???

thanks gyco

always thinking of others is good to a certain extent, but I don't really know/love/like/ have a relationship w/ myself, guess, since I have been all tied up in mike and his/ my /our stuff over the past 20 years.................??? I am going to focus on getting to know myself, letting go of baggage, clutter, etc, getting my priorities/values/ all in tune w/ my feelings/energy.............looking forward to the energy, off to bed now tho, as I have another 12 hour shift tonight, thanks for your kind thoughts........:thanks:...........all is appreciated, cannot wait to start on this journey...............but one breath/minute/hour..........one step at a time..............I WILL get there, need to get rid of the clutter as I said, am working on that, thanks to a dear friend I have met here, you all are such a blessing..............:l :l

xo :h :l

MA

[toughintexas]

new 30 day thread???

MA, you will get thru this! Just found out my stepdaughter's hubby walked out on she and their lil girl...he's been abusive and has cheated on her from the get go...she is absolutely beautiful too, does half ironmans, body to die for, you name it, she is devastated, BUT, she's so glad she has some peace of mind...doesn't have to worry about living in the hell of it anymore. You were given your life back, embrace it, and go get counselling!!! After all you've been thru, I'm amazed they didn't mandate you having some help....I love you! I'm in Colorado with hubby, he's been here a week, and we're having a blast, so I'm not on here much, but you can call if you need too!

[cowgal]

new 30 day thread???

hey all

Glad to have this thread going again.................almost done w/ work, heading to get a hay situation w/ the horses taken care of and then a much therapeutic ride is in order...............intense counseling going on, not focusing on al, mostly just finding/trusting/loving myself, alot of intense work on that, staying away from al is important but diving into the reasons why I did drink, helping shed light on alot............like they say in AA, alcohol is but a symptom, why we drank is the real focus we need to embrace..............I am happy to have all this getting settled, finding myself, trusting, loving myself again, after 20 yrs. of focusing on hubby who didn't give a hoot about me, kids, who I love dearly.............etc...............it is a journey.............loving it:heart:...........discovering alot at age 46, I should have learned at 26!!!!:happyheart:

love u guys still expecting that divorce party to come together, I need something to look forward to after all this work I am doing.................xoxo lots of love to you all...................

lots of love you guys, tit, will call if I get a chance, got a few busy days ahead of me between appts and trying to enjoy this finally warm weather, having lunch w/ the kids etc...........totally looking forward to it tho...............

xoxoxoxo

MA:h

[greeneyes]

new 30 day thread???

MA great! I'm so glad you are actively in counseling! It can be hard work and unsettling (in a box of kleenex sort of way :H) but it's like a flower garden. Gotta dig around in the dirt first. (oh greenie puhleez go back to bed :H)

[time2change]

new 30 day thread???

MA
Busy is good. I know it keeps me from getting in trouble...LOL.
I am glad you are going to counseling. I agree that it is hard work and exhausting but it will be so worth it in the long run.
Great that you are going to see Ruby next weekend. I know you have been looking forward to this for a longtime. Enjoy the time away, concert and time with Zac.
It is fianlly warm and I am going to play golf with the girls today. Always a good time.
Have a good a day everyone.

[cowgal]

new 30 day thread???

yeah

off to ride in a little while, what a gorgeous day, will probably come out w/ a sunburn/tan, but appreciate all the outdoor activity I can get at this point................tired of being held up in the apt w/ below normal temps..................loving it:h:h...................will be a great weekend regardless...........................YES!!!!

MA:h