Who`s to blame?

[Shikakai]

Who`s to blame?

Unfortunately, Bunny, alcohol is a drug. It's the worst one out there and, yes, everyone has access to it and it's "government approved". The only thing is that alcohol, unlike other drugs, is not demonized.

Honestly, if you knew that alcohol was HIGHLY ADDICTIVE and you could become strung out on it the same way you could become strung out on crack, would you have drank it?

NO!

And you know why alcohol is legal and crack isn't? It's BECAUSE it takes years before you become addicted to it. It's a progressive and slow-moving addiction/disease, whereas with crack and other illicit drugs, you can become an addict with the first inhale.

So why doesn't our lovely government tell us any of this? Why did I have to learn all this in DUI classes and after I got sick? Because they WANT you sick! Alcohol is big business in America and and alcoholism is even BIGGER! $$$$ Ching-ching-ching let that goddamn cash register ring!

Still proud to be an American? HA! Who would be proud of a country that purposely sets up its citizens by not telling them the TRUTH about the dangers of alcohol? They tell you the dangers about EVERYTHING ELSE in this place! Not only does the country promote alcohol, THE WORST DRUG OUT THERE AND IT'S LEGAL, they GLAMORIZE IT! LOL!

And once you're hooked, you're just that: HOOKED!

So, no, in many ways, it's not your fault, because nobody bothered to tell you any of this! Now you know! TOO LATE, HUH? YOU'RE SICK!

[Shikakai]

Who`s to blame?

Anotherday;817620 wrote: Well, major congrats on those 19 days! even if you are feeling grumpy.

Heehee! Yes, feel grumpy, just don't go and have a beer!

Congrats, Nova!

[brittzak]

Who`s to blame?

You have to take responsibility and the forgive to live. Stop fighting yourself....we can beat this. You just have to want to beat and stop making excuses for your own behavior.

[mario]

Who`s to blame?

Many of us believe that a lot of our problems are some one else's fault, If others were more understanding, less critical, easier to love ,we would be happier and things would be less hard to deal with.
But that's not true and were lucky its not.
If our happiness was tied to others whims we would be happy less often.
To have more happiness & security in our lives, we may have to change how we act & that's not always easy, When happiness eludes us to often we must look to ourselves for the remedy,The changes we need to make wont be comfortable at first, they may pinch the ego, But relying on our own belief to keep us willing to change makes the transition possible, At the end of the day just like the people before you ,your happiness and focus is up to you.

[BUNNY]

Who`s to blame?

So now the government is responsible for my addiction? Yes alcohol sales do generate revenue but i don`t think alcoholism does, it actually places a financial strain on the health care system, so i don`t really think the governement wants people to become addicts, sorry i just don`t buy it. And as far as being ashamed to be an american, then i guess everyone on this site should feel the same about their country since alcohol is legal pretty much everywhere. Hell, i`m canadian and our legal drinking age is 18!
The point of my thread was not to lay blame (maybe i didn`t choose the right title) but to learn to face, acknowledge and take responsibility and maybe by learning how to do this we will add another tool in our fight against this disease. Knowing what i know now, I, and no one else, is responsible for my choices. If i cannot succeed on my own, then it is up to me to seek the help i need whatever that may be.

By the way, love what you wrote Chillgirl, will print it and keep it on me.

Have a wonderful Sunday!

[Funny Girl]

Who`s to blame?

Bunny - you're Canadian - the comment was about the American Govt & it's glamorizing alcohol. There is something to our system & how it does promote certain things based on money. I totally understand the point that Shikakai is making.

You can say what you want, & you did name the thread 'blame' leaving yourself open to this sort of discussion. I understand where you intended to go, but the tone certainly doesn't come off that way - it came off as seeming a little hard edged & not very compassionate - that's my two cents. People aren't trying to make excuses, but are seeking a bit of understanding. Maybe you know all the answers but everyone else may still have some questions.

[Shikakai]

Who`s to blame?

Right and how much do all these recover programs cost, Bunny? How much does it cost you as an individual or your health insurance?

Think about all the fines and penalties you have to pay if you become a criminal/chronic drunk?

The money is HUGE and if there isn't one thing I've learned about America is that it is MONEY-DRIVEN!

This country doesn't do anything for anybody without considering the bottom line!

18 is the legal drinking age? That's underage drinking here and the younger you are when you begin to "indulge", the more quickly you will see yourself in rehab, jail or dead! You choose!

I'm only taking responsibility for not informing myself about the dangers of alcohol, since my "government" glamorized the DRUG and told me it was okay to drink it and drink as much of it as I wanted and never let on it was ADDICTIVE and DEADLY!

This is truly a "if only I had known" subject.

Happy Sunday to you as well. Here in California, spring is almost here. It' sunny, clear and the birds are singing

[Shikakai]

Who`s to blame?

Funny Girl;817893 wrote: Bunny - you're Canadian - the comment was about the American Govt & it's glamorizing alcohol. There is something to our system & how it does promote certain things based on money. I totally understand the point that Shikakai is making.

You can say what you want, & you did name the thread 'blame' leaving yourself open to this sort of discussion. I understand where you intended to go, but the tone certainly doesn't come off that way - it came off as seeming a little hard edged & not very compassionate - that's my two cents. People aren't trying to make excuses, but are seeking a bit of understanding. Maybe you know all the answers but everyone else may still have some questions.

Yes, I don't know how it is in other countries, but here in the states, you can't turn on the TV without watching people "enjoying" their alcohol. Characters on TV shows act like they can't make it throughout the day without a drink.

And although they don't run ads the way they used to showing people drinking alcohol, beautiful women all around and a fast car in the background, the message is still clear, although much more subtle, which in my opinion makes it even more deadly.

Over the last 10 years, I've noticed they put "drink responsibly" at the bottom of the screen at the end of the commercial... the message is in very small lettering... UH HUH!

And my question would be, why do I have to drink responsibly? I would LOVE to hear the answer to that!

Because that sh** will make you sick if you drink too much of it, but they DON'T TELL YOU THAT!

Such a racket! The whole damn country is just all about the dollar! This country does not care about any of us! Legalize alcohol; lead you to believe it's okay to imbibe 'til your heart's content. You believe it and then they throw you in rehab (which you have to pay for) or throw you in jail and you have to pay for that too! They don't care how many people lose their lives; how many drunks kill up innocent people because the money is too much for them to care!

Promotion of alcohol? AHA, SUCKER! This country makes it seem like you can't live without it! It's EVERYWHERE!

[Funny Girl]

Who`s to blame?

They have health insurance provided by the govt . . . . if you have an alcohol problem here & your employer doesn't provide you with group health insurance, you can't even GET health insurance - I know - I sell it . . . . .

[Shikakai]

Who`s to blame?

When I was struggling really badly in 2008, Funny, I didn't have healthcare (not working) and the facility told me that because I am able-bodied and childless, that I didn't qualify for government healthcare, ALTHOUGH I had worked for more than 20 years paying taxes, but yet a welfare queen, able-bodied enough to give birth multiple times, was eligible for government healthcare off MY tax dollars! You get old people who migrate from all over the world and their first stop is the social security office to get an "old age" check, Medicare and food stamps, even though they haven't contributed one thin dime to this racket of a system! Did I already mention that I'm sick of this country? Oh God!

And now I'm sick and they want to penalize me and make ME pay? The two examples don't have to pay a damn thing, but I DO! NICE! *seething*

Anyway, I'm much better today, mentally and physically, and that's all that matters; no THANKS to the "Un-Tied States of America"!

[rubywillow]

Who`s to blame?

I have 2 children in their 30's. Seven grandchildren from 4 to 20. Two in-laws who are 85, and Hubs and I are 58. That's 4 generations with a 'built-in' pre-disposition for alcoholism. I didn't understand that til I'd been drinking a decade. It never occured to me, or my husband, that we drank because both our fathers were alcoholics at one time. They pulled themselves out of it, and that's what stuck; that we had been given the gifts of life, and decent parents who worked hard to better their families lives, and that's the way we lived. Our son plays the victim, and I won't baby him in that fantasy, like his grandparents, and sometimes Hubs, do. Our daughter is a steel magnolia, knows the dangers, the signs, and has pushed me harder than anyone to get straight. Now, another generation is coming along and I worry which way their tendencies will take them. The only thing I can show, teach, and expect from them is accountability. We CHOOSE the world around us, for the most part. If we don't like it, we are the only ones with the power to change it. I read the studies, hope for cures, pray for those in pain, but there is only one person responsible for who we become, and that person IS in the mirror.

[mario]

Who`s to blame?

rubywillow;817921 wrote: I have 2 children in their 30's. Seven grandchildren from 4 to 20. Two in-laws who are 85, and Hubs and I are 58. That's 4 generations with a 'built-in' pre-disposition for alcoholism. I didn't understand that til I'd been drinking a decade. It never occured to me, or my husband, that we drank because both our fathers were alcoholics at one time. They pulled themselves out of it, and that's what stuck; that we had been given the gifts of life, and decent parents who worked hard to better their families lives, and that's the way we lived. Our son plays the victim, and I won't baby him in that fantasy, like his grandparents, and sometimes Hubs, do. Our daughter is a steel magnolia, knows the dangers, the signs, and has pushed me harder than anyone to get straight. Now, another generation is coming along and I worry which way their tendencies will take them. The only thing I can show, teach, and expect from them is accountability. We CHOOSE the world around us, for the most part. If we don't like it, we are the only ones with the power to change it. I read the studies, hope for cures, pray for those in pain, but there is only one person responsible for who we become, and that person IS in the mirror.

:agreed:ruby:agreed:

[Brave Hearted]

Who`s to blame?

Hi Been reading this thread with interest, my opinion for what its worth is I dont balme myself for having an illness ! nobody would expect a diabetic to blame themsleves !! A problem with al is predestined in our brain and as al is so socialbley exceptable most of us start as social drinkers when we are young (which is the norm in most societies) but its only us unlucky ones who have the illness who go on to develop the illness to varying degrees. And blame ???? thats a tough one, but I dont blame myself I am sick and yes I carried on drinking even though I knew I had a problem, but by then it had a grip of me and walking away is not that easy. It was not till I came on here found out about meds and all the support on here that things changed. And I do agree governments across the world (I am in the UK ) support the sale of al as its a big money spinner and those of us that suffer at the hand of al are a calculated loss. if that makes sense ? .But although I dont blame myself for my problem, now I know that there is a solution I have to take responsibility for my actions and kep looking and learning about my illness. BUt one thing I do know is that balming myself in the past when I did not know I was ill just made me feel worse and want to drink more !

Good luck to all

BH xx

[Shikakai]

Who`s to blame?

rubywillow;817921 wrote: I have 2 children in their 30's. Seven grandchildren from 4 to 20. Two in-laws who are 85, and Hubs and I are 58. That's 4 generations with a 'built-in' pre-disposition for alcoholism. I didn't understand that til I'd been drinking a decade. It never occured to me, or my husband, that we drank because both our fathers were alcoholics at one time. They pulled themselves out of it, and that's what stuck; that we had been given the gifts of life, and decent parents who worked hard to better their families lives, and that's the way we lived. Our son plays the victim, and I won't baby him in that fantasy, like his grandparents, and sometimes Hubs, do. Our daughter is a steel magnolia, knows the dangers, the signs, and has pushed me harder than anyone to get straight. Now, another generation is coming along and I worry which way their tendencies will take them. The only thing I can show, teach, and expect from them is accountability. We CHOOSE the world around us, for the most part. If we don't like it, we are the only ones with the power to change it. I read the studies, hope for cures, pray for those in pain, but there is only one person responsible for who we become, and that person IS in the mirror.

Right! I wish I had had someone around willing to show me and TEACH me the evils and perils of overly indulging in alcohol! Unfortunately, that would have meant they would have had to suffer from this disease, and I wouldn't wish this on anyone, not even a foe

Alas, I've had to learn all by my lonesome and it hasn't been pretty...

I love your signature, Ruby!

[mario]

Who`s to blame?

Like a lot of people here I knew for a very long time that i had a major problem with drinking, But i choose to ignore & deny it, I could have got help i could have gone to a doctor/AA/online forums etc but i didn't bother,I dont blame anybody else but myself,it was me that got me into it & it will be me who gets me out of it.