Marriage....

[KatieB]

Marriage....

So that's where I went wrong!
I married the guy I thought I could live with.. turns out I had to live without him!
I thought my ex was a "safe" man.. we started out as best friends, and even though there was no passion, I thought it would "grow" on me.. he seemed to understand me and love me like no other.. i truly thought he was safe and would always treat me kindly - i chose this over passion! and look where it got me!!! - assaulted, verbally abused on a daily basis - my point is - THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS SAFE!! I am not going to make that mistake again-
Next time... I will remember this motto and make sure the man in question is a man that I cannot live without.. a man that I am passionate about as I would rather be on my own than with someone for just security - as it turns out, I wasnt secure at all, couldnt be far enough from it..
Katie xxx

[hiddengoal]

Marriage....

The best would be this: the man you cannot live without...is also a man who cannot live without you....nothing else would matter.

[KatieB]

Marriage....

true hiddengoal.. you want someone that appreciates you as much as them - an equal passion! I love this quote:
"What is love? As far as I can tell, it is a passion, admiration and respect. If you have two, you have enough. If you have all three, you don't have to die to go heaven." William Wharton

I want all three! my last marriage had none! :H

[IAD]

Marriage....

Hidden.....yep ! It has to work both ways ! ( Of course mine did'nt know that she could'nt live with out me, till I told her so ! Ha! ) IAD

[IAD]

Marriage....

That floored her ! Ha! IAD

[dancingon]

Marriage....

Yes, that's all great. But KatieB and others please don't think you need a man to complete you. Tom Cruise didn't know squat. As a suddenly single female in her late 40s I'm determined to get on with who I am, rather than chasing some guy. Not that i've ruled it out for the future, but sheezch you need some time to float your boat.

[KatieB]

Marriage....

dancingon,
It's not that I feel I need a man to 'complete' me.. but just having a companion in life makes things more fun.. my son won't be little forever and will be at school etc/having his own friends eventually.. and other women my age are mostly married so don't have the time to hang out with me very much.. i am perfectly happy on my own and enjoy my own company (as i have previously mentioned that i cant stand society a lot of the time!), but it would be nice for someone to share my life and have adventures with.. though i certainly won't be jumping into another relationship in a hurry, especially after what i went through with my ex.. i just want to "test the waters" and see what's out there..
Katie xx

[IAD]

Marriage....

Ladies.....your life is complete...All you need is yourself ! IAD

[rubywillow]

Marriage....

I agree with have to love ourselves before we even entertain the idea of complicating our lives with relationships. I don't put too much stock in the (usually) fleeting relationships of the famous; they don't live in the real world most of the time. I don't look to them for examples in living life. If you watch TV at all, there is usually a spectacular crash and burn reported daily. If for some reason I was not married to Hubs, I'd be out there joining groups who have similar interests, exploring my own talents. My sister was married 4 times, each worse than the one before. She's still attractive, successful, but bitter, and has some resentments towards me because I SEEM luckier than her. It's very complicated, but I can't help her choices, or their results. A good marriage, like sobriety, takes work on both sides. When people ask how we've managed to last almost 40 years, I answer that only one of us is allowed to be crazy at a time, and it's my turn right now.

[mama bear]

Marriage....

Rubes......we say the EXACT same thing.....but it's always my turn to be crazy!!! He is my rock and I would prolly be a fullblown drunk or druggie without him.....we have a great partnership based mutual respect.....lots of frustration at times....but right now we are going through some tough times financially and it has made our bond even stronger.....

[rubywillow]

Marriage....

Remember, there's someone for everyone!

[mama bear]

Marriage....

Aw Rubes....
You and Hubs look so happy!!!!

[IAD]

Marriage....

No....no Ruby ! Ha! IAD