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The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

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    #631
    The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

    thank time and thats the plan quiting after this cartin of smokes .. who going to want to deal with me .. could be mading ,crazyness or just another walk in the park .. yeah right bring it on
    :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
    best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

    Comment

      #632
      The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

      That's right Roger.....the only time I smoke is when I'm set on fire ! Ha! IAD
      ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
      those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
      Dr. Seuss

      Comment

        #633
        The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

        Roger, I am going to commit to quitting with you. I've got 5 packs left in this carton and I'm not going to buy anymore! WE CAN DO IT!!! Ruby, sounds like you are having a great time! I'm so happy for you. MB, I am so excited you are finally getting paid. Do something nice for yourself! You deserve it, you are awesome! Tony, you're a BAD BOY! I love you all! Vicki
        I'm not what I should be, I'm not what I could be. I'm definetly not who I want to be,
        but I'm sure not who I used to be!

        There is no pit so deep that God's love is not deeper still.

        "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME." Phil 4:13

        Comment

          #634
          The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

          I received this pm this morning and thought about it all day. I totally agree with this and it makes me sick! I'm keeping the author anoymous. How could someone convince her to stop taking her meds and promise her a happy life only for her to be let down again? I'm so sad her life is over.

          MaryAnne - just a few thoughts...
          Hi - me again.
          This has been bothering me a bit since reading back over MaryAnne's last posts. I haven't posted anything and don't intend to. I'm only sending you this because I see that you have been greatly upset by this and I am wondering why everyone is asking why MaryAnne took her own life and no one asks about what she posted a few days before. This is what I came up with...I've put the important parts in red. She posted this on Apr. 27...

          Baclofen has done wonders for me until I went down a dark path and tried to off myself, between that in my system and al, and all the other things, I almost did it, thank GOD for this med tho, as it has gotten me back off al and on the right track just have your brother be care for withdrawals, they are dangerous, benzos will help and this
          LOL, you guys never fail to make me laugh my butt off!!! Catch, hope your buns are ok......IAD, you are a trip, you too RUBY!!! BUT Ruby, feel better, get some rest, it helped me, in a good place again thanks to sleep, paul has this whole prescription for me, and sleep is #2 on the list, but eating totally differently, unhealthy in US standards, feels pretty good, and doing it for almost 2 weeks, off all my meds now, not even vitamins, as if i eat right, no al, I will get what i need, feel physically fab, and mentally clear!!! COOLER THAN ANYTHING!!!

          What concerned me is that this guy had set up a whole new plan for her and she was off all her meds. This so soon after the overdose. Then there was another post on the 2nd of May about her missing her plane and he just left her to her own means...
          Well, I am busy in HELL, had to spend the night in Jburg, airport, that sucked!!!! now i am a day behind in schedule, very tired but af.,.........................just pissed paul did not come to airport after the week, felt abandoned. was operating on 2 hours sleep fell asleep and missed my flight, all he had to say was sorry, don't have $$ to get there so stick w/ what i taught u, u cannot go back to your old ways, WHICH I AM NOT, but did briefly, you kow!!???
          love you all, coming back a very very tired new Mary Anne.......................

          She mentioned money several times when she was gone and even at one point about having to eat for the next four days so obviously she was paying for her food and she was worried about her finances. Then she gets back home and finds out that maybe she didn't have a job to go back to. Did that guy really expect that she would be able to handle getting back home and all the stress of trying to deal with everyday stuff without the meds that she was given for that purpose. As I said, I'm not trying to blame anyone. Just that I put a few things together when I was reading her posts and I'm surprised that no one commented about those things. Maybe this will give you a better idea of what she was dealing with and why she felt she couldn't go on and didn't want to reach out for help.
          I'm not what I should be, I'm not what I could be. I'm definetly not who I want to be,
          but I'm sure not who I used to be!

          There is no pit so deep that God's love is not deeper still.

          "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME." Phil 4:13

          Comment

            #635
            The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

            ok vick you got a deal lets do it together ..
            i have try way too many times .. but i think i can i think i can i know i can i know i can .. like the little engine that could and did ..
            and well vicky sometime s there nothing anyone of us can do to help anyone unless they reach for tha hand of another ..
            i had to find out myself and i send a message to paul asking for any help trying to understand why ..
            and well it seems she had gone back to drinking at the airport and then as soon as she landed and on her way home..
            she ask her friend to stop and pick up some beer ...
            and with being off the meds and everything comeing down all at once could be too much for anyone...

            so lets hope and pray that we can help anyone in need to pervent this for happening again..
            but just know this will happen again and all we can do is try to be there for the next

            so with this been said please anyone that read this and feel that they need help reach out and get the help you need .. we are here for you and let this be known you can find my phone number atmy web site at the bottum of every post and use it and call me ill try my best and listen .. without any judgment just because i have been there and done almost everything you have done and maybe more
            :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
            best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

            Comment

              #636
              The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

              I had worried about the meds too, but when she fell, she always fell hard. She had promised me not to take the 'coward' way again, to call me. But she was a very lost soul, should have been under docs care. I called her # today hoping to get Zak but got her voice, and it tore me up again. She had told me she did'nt want me to think she was a coward, so I reget putting that in her mind. I feel she was ashamed to come here again and cry for help. I know I could only do so much but the guilt lingers.
              sigpic
              Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
              awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

              Comment

                #637
                The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                ill put it this way ruby please dont feel any guilt or regret in anyway .. we were there for her and the rest was up to her
                :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
                best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

                Comment

                  #638
                  The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                  So true Roger. She had so many to reach out to. But I know it is never that simple.

                  Comment

                    #639
                    The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                    No questions now for me
                    Their answers cannot turn back time
                    There is a space where she should be
                    And will be for all time
                    :sun:

                    Comment

                      #640
                      The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                      Beautiful thought, Gold.
                      sigpic
                      Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                      awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

                      Comment

                        #641
                        The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                        good monring one and all .. so whats the plan for today ... sue and i have a pool party to go to ..but not sure if i want to go ... so anyway whats your plans .. have an awesome day enjoy
                        :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
                        best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

                        Comment

                          #642
                          The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                          Mama is here....
                          I've been to Walmart....which I despise, but they have great prices on groceries
                          Then took my son to the store to buy a black shirt and white he HAD to have for....get this......his 8th grade graduation....you would think it's the Senior Prom the way he's acting
                          My oldest went and got his new car....remember insurance totalled his truck?
                          So papa bear found a 1999 honda prelude...fire engine red.....power everything and sunroof...damn it's nicer than what I drive!!!!!
                          Bought "Avatar" at wally world, so we are staying in tonight.
                          I had a "moment" in walmart of all places.....I was walking around troubleded with myself that I cannot seem to go AF and I was having a silent chat with God.....and suddenly I got shivers and felt like I could have floated off the floor...it was very etheral......perhaps it's mere exhaustion from such a crazy week....but I chose to believe God heard me......
                          anyway...enough deep stuff....
                          as far as MA......there is nothing anyone could have done. She seemed determined to do this and I hope she is at peace. Don't feel guilty Ruby, and I can only imagine how much hearing her voice upset you.
                          I love you guys
                          Jan
                          I love my family more than alcohol.:h
                          Live in the Solution....not the problem

                          Comment

                            #643
                            The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                            I'm good, guys. It HAS been a tough week. Seems like another shoe drops before I get over the first. But that's life and better to experience it in person. Like the song, 'I could have missed the pain, but then I would have missed the dance'.
                            sigpic
                            Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                            awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

                            Comment

                              #644
                              The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                              I personally like "My Give a Damn is Busted"......
                              It's gonna get better Rubes...I promise
                              I love my family more than alcohol.:h
                              Live in the Solution....not the problem

                              Comment

                                #645
                                The Journey begins here so get YOUR ASSES IN GEAR!!!!

                                Sorry...I've been working outside all day today Ha! ........Hope everyone is doing fine....IAD
                                ?Be who you are and say what you feel because
                                those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.?
                                Dr. Seuss

                                Comment

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