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The Good The Bad and The Ugly

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    The Good The Bad and The Ugly

    Took the Fam to Disney World last weekend. They've got a FL resident deal going right now that's $99 for 4 days and you just can't beat it, then they've also got some discount going on their resorts too, to stay with them, which I highly recommend. Just park at the resort hotel then use the Disney buses to go everywhere.

    Anyway, we arrived last thurs night and chilled at the pool after getting settled, went to Magic Kingdom Fri, came back for nap friday afternoon, then returned to the park for the evening. Saturday we got up late and got to the park around noon, then spent ALL DAY LONG with no break. Sunday we got up real late and putzed around, went to Downtown Disney, then came home.

    At the parks, it was stressful sure, but it was fun. The kids acted like kids, and of course the heat, and the crowds, the lines, etc...but I was fine. Not once did I have the "oh god I need a drink" feeling. That said, Friday night back at the pool, I did have the "hey I'm on vacation" feeling so I had a couple drinks. Saturday night, same thing, and it progressed to buying a pint of whiskey at the hotel store b/c the bar is so freakin expensive. Sunday was Mother's Day and we're waking around DT Disney and it's shopping which I hate and by this time I'm about tired of hemorrhaging money, even tho I'm having a good time, but it's like "stop the bleeding". So I had a beer and a strawberry frozen margarita. Sunday night back at home I did not drink.

    The Good: I did not have the "oh god I need a drink" feeling walking around the parks

    The Bad: I drank. 2 friday, 2 or more saturday, 2 in the middle of the day sunday

    The Ugly: last night, Monday night, I had the "oh god I need a drink" feeling, but I didn't drink (rationalization much?). This morning, getting the boy dressed and ready for the day, he's cranky of course and whining for mommy and I had the "this is why people drink" thought. I haven't had that thought in a good ol long time.

    So, is it just the progression of a couple drinks, a couple drinks, and then a couple drinks that the beast is awakened? Or is it the stress of the weekend and still recovering, plus the drinks? Or is it just the drinks?

    I bet I know the answer, but I don't want to know. One of my favorite sayings is "The monkey on your back is only as big as you feed it". The more I drink, the bigger that monkey is. The less I drink, the smaller the monkey and easier to manage. But, a little here, and a little there, and apparently the monkey still grows? WTF? Still in that denial stage eh? Anger too? I keep bouncing all around those two.

    So, back to real life now. Back to work, back to the grind. Had a great time over the weekend, don't get me wrong, just cataloging my actions. So, I mentioned the deal is 4 days for $99, and we did two last weekend. Gonna do the other two my next off friday weekend in two weeks. Soo we'll be back at it all over again. At least my daughter will be out of school by then. OBTW, it's her birthday today. Where does the time go? She was just born yesterday, and today she's turning 6 and almost done with Kindergarten.

    Time is the fire in which we all burn.
    Sobriety Is Wasted On The Sober

    #2
    The Good The Bad and The Ugly

    Roamer,

    Great post. I love the honesty and the fact that you are truly thinking about what is going on.

    Unfortunately, I am one of those who simply cannot drink 1 or 2 drinks. If I drink 1, I drink 10. I can only speak for myself, though, everyone is so different.

    Love,
    Cindi
    AF April 9, 2016

    Comment


      #3
      The Good The Bad and The Ugly

      Excellent Post Roamer....and yes, you do know the answer...altho like many of us, we try to push it to the back of our minds and convince ourselves that we can control our drinking..one here..two there...no problem..I am in control.

      But the Beast needs these little drips to keep him alive....little by little he grows stronger and the Stinkin Thinkin starts..I was fine last night..I only had 2....so might just pour myself a little drink...no big deal.

      I would attribute stress to feeling like a drink but the thing to remember is...if we feed this stressful feeling with booze, it wil always be in the forefront of our minds that drink will take the stress away...like a magic remedy.....oh I feel stressed......answer? pour a drink.

      Even tho we think we are getting relief from the stresses and strains of the day, we are, in fact only feeding our addiction...

      There a millions of people who get stressed on a daily basis..day in day out but have other outlets to relieve it.....they don't need drink to alleviate it.

      If you toss a little kindling onto the fire..it will stay lit and the embers will glow....then you begin to feel chilly and toss another log on....in the blink of an eye you have got yerself a bonfire..


      Just my 2 cents...
      "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

      AF 10th May 2010
      NF 12th May 2010

      Comment


        #4
        The Good The Bad and The Ugly

        one2many;853908 wrote: If you toss a little kindling onto the fire..it will stay lit and the embers will glow....then you begin to feel chilly and toss another log on....in the blink of an eye you have got yerself a bonfire.
        new favorite analogy
        Sobriety Is Wasted On The Sober

        Comment


          #5
          The Good The Bad and The Ugly

          Lmao, don't know where that came from......best way I could describe it I guess....

          Keep Strong Roamer, we are all behind you x
          "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

          AF 10th May 2010
          NF 12th May 2010

          Comment


            #6
            The Good The Bad and The Ugly

            roamer723;853901 wrote:
            So, is it just the progression of a couple drinks, a couple drinks, and then a couple drinks that the beast is awakened? Or is it the stress of the weekend and still recovering, plus the drinks? Or is it just the drinks?

            I bet I know the answer, but I don't want to know. One of my favorite sayings is "The monkey on your back is only as big as you feed it". The more I drink, the bigger that monkey is. The less I drink, the smaller the monkey and easier to manage. But, a little here, and a little there, and apparently the monkey still grows? WTF? Still in that denial stage eh? Anger too? I keep bouncing all around those two.
            Awesome Post !! Very thought provoking. Great explanation as to how this addiction truly works.

            Your blog is also very interesting. I am enjoying reading it, as you have a great writing ability. Thanks !
            Miss October :blinkylove:

            Comment


              #7
              The Good The Bad and The Ugly

              thanks for all the positive comments everybody.
              Sobriety Is Wasted On The Sober

              Comment

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