Hey Theme, I don't have a genuine reason, yet. My reason is day by day - hopefully today will make sense, hopefully tomorrow things will improve, sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. But I am not gonna let this thing beat me, no way, I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night scared and saying I don't want to die alone here, then I just lie back down and see what I have achieved in this new chapter of my life and the future that will come if I continue doing what I am doing. I thank god for these people at mwo, together we are one and together we help each other, I am not that great at putting words together, but I have been where you are and want to say it will pass, I swear.
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Alcohol death
Hey Theme, I don't have a genuine reason, yet. My reason is day by day - hopefully today will make sense, hopefully tomorrow things will improve, sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. But I am not gonna let this thing beat me, no way, I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night scared and saying I don't want to die alone here, then I just lie back down and see what I have achieved in this new chapter of my life and the future that will come if I continue doing what I am doing. I thank god for these people at mwo, together we are one and together we help each other, I am not that great at putting words together, but I have been where you are and want to say it will pass, I swear.
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Alcohol death
Well said Wanna..
Mamma that really is a wake up call, keep it close to your heart, life really is too precious.
Theme, we are all behind you girl...still writing those beautiful words I see xxx"It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"
AF 10th May 2010
NF 12th May 2010
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Things like this are eye-opening aren't they? And scary if we spend too much time dwelling on them. Makes you appreciate every day of life. Thanks for sharing Mama.
And Theme, please let us know if we can help you!
xoxo
K9:heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:
Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.
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Alcohol death
Mama Bear,
So sorry to hear about your co-worker's nephew. We need to really not repeat history. I think we certainly increase our risks by our drinking behaviours. Even if we aren't full blown drinking 24/7 we DEFINITELY could reduce our risk factors for fatal diseases by controlling or absteining.
Perhaps your co-worker's nephew didn't feel a lot of problems and didn't think they were too bad (like many of us here I suppose). It was the un-noticed straw that broke the camel's back.
Well how many straws do we all have on our backs? Scarey to think. WE NEED TO STOP THIS FROM HAPPENING TO US!
As horrible as it is we must take the lesson to be learned here. Just think how many straws are we carrying??
Theme, as wannachange said, as ugly as life seems at the moment it will pass. It will get better. Chat, post, get someone to talk or help. You deserve a happy life everyone does. and it will come.
Meech
:l:h :armsaround:
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Alcohol death
Mama Bear,
Sorry to hear about your co-workers nephew.
I don't know if I've ever shared this but 6 years ago I was told I had between 2 - 5 years left to live if I continued drinking the way I was. I was drinking at least 2 bottles of wine a night.
Each time I would not drink for 3 months and as soon as my liver enzymes showed normal I would go back to my old ways. I was told each time I kept falling off the wagon my liver would be hit harder and harder.
This disease/addiction is a killer whether it be physical or mentally.
I'm happy to say today that my liver is as healthy as someone who has never taken an alcoholic drink in their life
J x
:lIt could be worse, I could be filing.
AF since 7/7/2009
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Alcohol death
so sorry to hear that MB .. WE HAVe HAD so many taken away.. dur to al .. so i say lets all just do our best to make a difference and move to make it better for ourself and other that are out there ..:beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..
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Wow MamaB,
Just goes to show that AL can cause many many health probs.. what you described is a DVT breaking up and ending up as a PE (pulmonary embolus - blood clot in the lung) - I guess this was probably caused due to AL thickening the blood.. it sure is a wake up call.. it's so sad hearing stories like this, when ppl are so young.. but at least we are here and getting help.. I am so determined to keep at this 30 day challenge, and hopefully beyond! I never want to go back to the way I was again.."It works if you work it, because you are worth it!!!"
:groupluv:
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Alcohol death
Hi MamaB, that is strange as normally AL thins the blood.. which is good and bad, as this following article explains:
Blood. Alcohol can cause changes to all the types of blood cells. Red blood cells become abnormally large. White blood cells (important for fighting infections) decrease in number, resulting in a weakened immune system. This places alcoholics at increased risk for infections, and is thought to account in part for the increased risk of cancer faced by alcoholics (ten times increased over normal). Platelets and blood clotting factors are affected, causing an increased risk of bleeding.
So, alcohol is more likely to cause internal bleeding such as strokes, rather than a clot..
Sorry, but as a nurse, I could not help but do some research.. I am very sorry to hear about your co-worker's nephew still.. AL causes so much damage in many ways - it's a real eye-opener and good reminder as to why we are here..
Katie xxx"It works if you work it, because you are worth it!!!"
:groupluv:
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Alcohol death
A few months ago I found out that one of my best friends up until 9th grade died of alcoholism related issues. This is why our other friend who was part of the "trio" couldn't find her on Facebook. So the friend googled her name only to find her obituary. She died at the age of 35. Left behind two daughters. Died at 35!!! It rang a slight bell in my head but I just figured at the time that she must've been swiggin' whiskey all day every day and that's why AL took her. Now that I'm coming clean with myself, I look at her death differently. Especially since I recently decided to mix a ton of booze with a ton of prescription drugs. Didn't think that would hurt me. Just wanted a really great buzz. So silly...Frangipani
Last night of binge drinking May 4, 2010
AF Since May 5, 2010
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So Sorry
MB, I want to add that I am very sad for the loss of the nephew. It truly is a wake up call. Probably none of us think substance abuse is going to take us. I actually considered myself to be healthy as a horse...unless I was drunk at the time of course! But I always got right back on that health kick. Who knows what my liver looks like really or my esophogus from all the throwing up I've done. I also agree that this employee of yours was very brave to say what she said to you. I've only been on this forum a little over a week but I always enjoy looking at your picture (if that's really you). You have a really warm and beautiful look that makes me want to know you more.Frangipani
Last night of binge drinking May 4, 2010
AF Since May 5, 2010
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Alcohol death
Yes I had a close friend as well - went to school with. Last January she died of alcoholism. Liver and kidneys finally failed. She had gone to re-hab twice but eventually stopped trying. 40 years old.
She left a husband and two young daughters behind. She was such a smart, athletic, funny and caring person. Very tragic. It did give me a wake up call but not enough as I figured I wasn't that bad. Still in control, didn't drink everyday, ate healthy blah blah blah.
Who was I kidding? She was like me but just kept falling. Well I could keep falling and I don't think it would be too big of a drop before I am in the same hole she was.
I am realizing this year that it's time to do what I can to stay on this planet for me, my kids, husband and friends for as long as I can.
I hope everyone here can succeed with AF so we continue on with a better free life.
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I Love you so. You are dear, precious and considerate beyond words.:notes:Theme2be
" Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections but instantly set about remedying them~everyday begin the task anew".-Saint Francis de Sales
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mama bear;855860 wrote: I wonder how much drinking you have to do to destroy your liver and develop blood clots????Formerly known as Teardrop:l
sober dry since 11th Jan '2010' relapse/slip on 23/7/13 working in progress ! Sober date 25/7/13 ( True learning has often followed an eclipse, a time of darkness, but with each cycle of my recovery, the light grows stronger and my vision is clearer. (AA)
my desire to avoid hitting bottom again was more powerful then my desire to drink !
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Sorry to hear MB. We never really know why AL hits some harder than others. Maybe something in the genes. Being in healthcare, I too never thought I was as bad as patients I would see. Form of denial? I am sure. Also a good excuse to continue the steady destruction.
Sure glad we are all working to change the inevitable path. AL will kill if we let it.
Winefree
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If that photo is of you Mama B
It is very sad and when I hear stories and have had relatives die of the 'disease/curse' of alcohol, my father and my sister. My father was 63 and my sister was 44. I am so shocked that I never learned from their mistakes or maybe I did, time will tell. Maybe I had to have my own history of alcohol abuse to fully understand the issues surrounding it. For when they were drunk and intolerable I would be the first to condemn their actions, now I feel more humble because in time it happened to me. So forgive them and understand the power behind this curse I do.
If that picture is of you Mama B you are far too beautiful to be a corpse in the land of alcohol. You look the picture of health and I pray you keep it that way.
Sad end to a young life. Curse this blessed alcohol....
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