I recently purchased a book by Susan Nolen-Hoeksema called Eating, Drinking, Overthinking: The Toxic Triangle of Food, Alcohol, and Depression--and How Women Can Break Free. I purchased the book before I even got this heavy into going after my permanent sobriety. I thought I would just see what the book had to say. Then I had two binge nights ON prescription narcotics within 3 nights of each other and now this book has more meaning than what I gave it when I bought it. My husband is reading it too and likes to read excerpts to me because he is amazed at how similar some of my feelings are to what the book is saying. It is so wonderfully refreshing to know that overthinking about what I've said/not said--done/not done correctly and then brutalizing myself for all these "mistakes" is quite common amongst women. It says that when situations arise, women project inward about what THEY personally did wrong to contribute to the situation while men project outward looking to blame someone else for the situation. The book gives tools to help us break free from this self-destructive triangle.
Excerpt from page 7: "At the root of women's vulnerability to the toxic triangle is their tendency to respond to stress with what I call self-focused coping. When women are faced with a difficult situation, they turn inward to control or change themselves rather than focusing outward on the environment and individuals that need to change. Whereas men tend to externalize stress--blaming other people for their negative feelings and difficult circumstances--women tend to internalize it, holding it in their bodies and minds. When something bad happens to women, they analyze everything about the problem--how they feel about it, why it came about, and all its meanings and ramifications for themselves and their loved ones. Women are acutely aware of how their body feels in reaction to a problem--tension, agitation, lethargy, and a sense of being out of control in reaction to a problem. As a result, they are especially likely to do something to change how their body feels."
Excerpt 2 from page 8: "...when self-focused coping involves hurthing your body in some way, or gets in the way of doing something productive to overcome your problems, it becomes dangerous and maladaptive. Indeed, it can help transport you into the toxic triangle--depression, yo-yo eating habits, and heavy drinking."
Another book by the same author is called Women Who Think Too Much: How to Break Free of Over-thinking and Reclaim Your Life.
Happy Reading Family!
Excerpt from page 7: "At the root of women's vulnerability to the toxic triangle is their tendency to respond to stress with what I call self-focused coping. When women are faced with a difficult situation, they turn inward to control or change themselves rather than focusing outward on the environment and individuals that need to change. Whereas men tend to externalize stress--blaming other people for their negative feelings and difficult circumstances--women tend to internalize it, holding it in their bodies and minds. When something bad happens to women, they analyze everything about the problem--how they feel about it, why it came about, and all its meanings and ramifications for themselves and their loved ones. Women are acutely aware of how their body feels in reaction to a problem--tension, agitation, lethargy, and a sense of being out of control in reaction to a problem. As a result, they are especially likely to do something to change how their body feels."
Excerpt 2 from page 8: "...when self-focused coping involves hurthing your body in some way, or gets in the way of doing something productive to overcome your problems, it becomes dangerous and maladaptive. Indeed, it can help transport you into the toxic triangle--depression, yo-yo eating habits, and heavy drinking."
Another book by the same author is called Women Who Think Too Much: How to Break Free of Over-thinking and Reclaim Your Life.
Happy Reading Family!
awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, 
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