Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

[Guitarista]

This is something i still battle with now and then.
And just what is it, that i think i'm missing out on? A relaxing evening with friend's and a few wines? No. I'm actually more relaxed, calm, and focused than i've ever been. The anxiety and depression have gone, and luckily for me, they were al related.
Remove the grog, remove the fog. What i do notice (mostly), is the freedom, the clarity, the pride.
I have alway's been a bit of a big talkin' fool. I'm still a fool of course, but since giving up the booze, i am as it happen's, still big talkin', but the difference is i'm walkin the talk. AF does this to you. I've become a man of my word, and that means something.

[one2many]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

FANTASTIC post Mr G.

It took a long time for the penny to drop with me in regard to this.
I was still feeling I was missing out, I was sober but I was "doing without" "off the booze" "not for me thank you" while still looking longingly at others who were knocking back the vodka's.

Freedom, Clarity and Pride are exactly the 3 words I would use to describe how I feel now...

I don't miss it, I could never imagine bringing it back into my life and feeling the way I used to feel.

I feel so happy and grateful that it no longer is a part of my life, I feel like singing it from the rooftops....there is life after booze..a bloody better life and I am living it!!!

Oh and that goes for the smokes aswell....I am so grateful to have broken up with Nick O' Teen, he was a bastard.

[Rags]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Oh, 1 2 many,
How wonderful you must feel having stopped both alkyhol and Nickteen....what an achievement.

Mr G... you are nobody's fool!

And yes, it is the change in our attitude that changes our world around us. We are deprived and it is difficult only by thinking it is so. But each one of has has to come to that realisation in their own time.

[Chillgirl]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Guitarista - I could have written your post myself.
The glamorous notion of enjoying wine with friends is powerful but I fast forward this picture by a few hours and the scene is far from pretty!
If I ever have the thought that im missing out, i remind myself I had 30 years of partying...... isnt 30 years of anything too much?! And was there ever really that "one" night that was so great?! Not that I could ever remember.

For me too the depression and anxiety completey disappeared with the AL and I discovered that I had wrongly thought AL gave me confidence, actually I can hold my own pretty well sober!

Here's to FREEDOM, CLARITY and PRIDE!

[hillsidetime]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Hey Guitarista, nicely said. I am glad for you, and for how you feel. I totally agree with what you are saying. Taking the alcohol away, is such a transformation. Have a great weekend,
Hill

[startingover]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Mr G, you are quite an amazing bloke you know.
You have been clear from the very beginning what path you were gonna take and you took it no matter what life threw at you.
I can imagine there have been periods where you "fake it til you make it" like all of us have. But you are living proof that the af life is indeed a good one.

[wannachange]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Saves me a fortune on taxi fares... I can go out to the friends in my car and drive home in my car go through checkpoints with a grin - Yes it is indeed freedom and I feel chuffed when they ask me to roll down the window and the police sticks his big head in the window sniffing like a kangaroo and waves me on disappointingly oh and the feelings of clarity in the morning (I had a girlfriend called Clarity once so that sounds a bit odd) :H

[one2many]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

LMAO Wanna!!

[Doggygirl]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Great post Mr. G!! It took me a while, but I no longer feel deprived either. I was just mentioning on another thread that any fleeting notion of a drink being "nice" is these days, quicky followed by a reality check of what that would lead to. Thought gone. I love my AF life way too much to screw things up with drinking.

Chill, I remember your description of your girls night out and reading FB the next day realizing some of the girls carried on until the wee hours. I too had a good 30 years of being part of that wee hours crowd and I've definitely had enough of that to last me a lifetime! The thought of the wee hour drinking makes my eye balls hurt just thinking about it.

So no...I no longer feel like I'm missing out on anything by being an ex-drinker. If I were still drinking, I couldn't do a fraction of the stuff I'm now enjoying every day. In fact, if I hadn't stopped drinking there is a pretty good chance I would be dead. So no - I'm definitely not missing anything! :H

And Oney - congrats on dumping Nick. You will LOVE being rid of him.

DG

[spuddleduck]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

i guess we all had good times partying and drinking till the small hours. i can look back fondly at some great times. that was before AL changed me and took a hold in a bad way. i couldnt party till the small hours if i wanted to as i would guzzle quickly early on and pass out/fall over/piss everyone off... etc etc. those days were good at the time but are now gone.. enough is enough. i can also look back fondly at things i did before al got a hold, cycling, walking in the hills, enjoying life....... these are the things i can have back now and keep on for the rest of my life without killing myself. the dark days are over and im coming back to the light

[OverIt2007]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Whoa, Guitar.. Great post!!!!


I think this is where so many of us get tripped up. We think that having a drink is going to be a GOOD experience, when in reality.. It will really be a BAD experience for us. Its crazy thinking to think that it can EVER be a good experience. I suppose that is where the insanity of the disease takes over. Perhaps we get influenced just a bit too much by society as well, the commercials, ads with happy people with drinks in hand. It makes us feel a bit deprived. Why cant that be us smiling with drink in hand? Um, because you have a drinking problem!!!

The trick... Always remember that it will ALWAYS be a BAD experience for us. That sounds so simple, but yet its not! Alcohol is the ultimate Liar...

[techie]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Than you so much for this thread Mr G. I must admit when I first looked into MWO I was desperate to find a solution to my alcohol abuse. I thought I could moderate. Oh, I was so encouraged by the stories in the mod thread, no I was excited actually. I knew I was lying to myself. I've tried to control my drinking unsucessfully for years. So I did feel deprived when I started here. However, it was the encouragement of this community that changed my mindset. I knew an alcohol free lifestyle was my only way out. So I'm extremely grateful to all those who have helped me thus far. I'm on my way to meet that end. I think for me Ilike that at MWO I'm not cnfronted with dogma,, structure, or hierarchy. I'm only confronted with myself!

[techie]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Than you so much for this thread Mr G. I must admit when I first looked into MWO I was desperate to find a solution to my alcohol abuse. I thought I could moderate. Oh, I was so encouraged by the stories in the mod thread, no I was excited actually. I knew I was lying to myself. I've tried to control my drinking unsucessfully for years. So I did feel deprived. However, it was the encouragement of this community that changed my mindset. I knew an alcohol free lifestyle was my only way out. So I'm extremely grateful to all those who have helped me thus far. I'm on my way to meet that end. I think for me Ilike that at MWO I'm not confronted with dogma,, structure, or hierarchy. I'm only confronted with myself!

[Chillgirl]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

techie;878292 wrote: I think for me I like that at MWO I'm not confronted with dogma,, structure, or hierarchy. I'm only confronted with myself!

Perfectly said Techie.....

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

spuddleduck;878001 wrote: i guess we all had good times partying and drinking till the small hours. i can look back fondly at some great times. that was before AL changed me and took a hold in a bad way. i couldnt party till the small hours if i wanted to as i would guzzle quickly early on and pass out/fall over/piss everyone off... etc etc. those days were good at the time but are now gone.. enough is enough. i can also look back fondly at things i did before al got a hold, cycling, walking in the hills, enjoying life....... these are the things i can have back now and keep on for the rest of my life without killing myself. the dark days are over and im coming back to the light

That's great to hear Spud, and yep, i've done enough partying with al, to last a few lifetimes. Now it's time to party properly, without the booze. There is SO much to do, and so much fun to be had out there!

Great stuff Techie! For me, it is all about my thinking, not so much my drinking. Getting and maintaining a thankful, grateful mindset, or headspace is what i alway's aim for, and it doesn't take me too long to see what i am grateful for.
Just waking up this morning for me is a good start!