Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

[beagle]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

great thread mr g.
whilst i'm still in the tunnel & trying to get closer to lighter times, i think this sort of thinking is exactly what needs to be at the forefront of my mind.
I will be LUCKY when I am AF.
I am FORTUNATE to have a chance to be AF.
And best of all, I KNOW I will be a better person for it.

But damn if the tunnel ain't full of quicksand & tar......

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

OverIt2007;878202 wrote: Whoa, Guitar.. Great post!!!!


I think this is where so many of us get tripped up. We think that having a drink is going to be a GOOD experience, when in reality.. It will really be a BAD experience for us. Its crazy thinking to think that it can EVER be a good experience. I suppose that is where the insanity of the disease takes over. Perhaps we get influenced just a bit too much by society as well, the commercials, ads with happy people with drinks in hand. It makes us feel a bit deprived. Why cant that be us smiling with drink in hand? Um, because you have a drinking problem!!!

The trick... Always remember that it will ALWAYS be a BAD experience for us. That sounds so simple, but yet its not! Alcohol is the ultimate Liar...

Yep Over it, alcohol is a liar.

I think it's worth doing a bit of research on the addictive mind/brain. It's interesting to learn about our brain's chemical working's and reaction's when we take away alcohol, and how/why we can lose our resolve. Our brain needs to re-wire itself, and our habit/routine needs to change, and this can take a while.
It's during this re-wiring process, when our system is craving out for booze, and fighting the internal chemical changes that many of us find difficult to get through. But if we stick at it, and keep going, we'll come out the other side with far less craving's going on, and a more settled body and mind.
Then we start the work of nailing a healthier lifestyle. Well, that's just been my experience, and my description is just a basic, layman's overview.
There'll be more detailed info on this stuff in the holistic section, i think.

You will find your way out Beagle. Getting angry can help. Use it as a positive energy.

[mario]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Guitarista;877817 wrote: This is something i still battle with now and then.
And just what is it, that i think i'm missing out on? A relaxing evening with friend's and a few wines? No. I'm actually more relaxed, calm, and focused than i've ever been. The anxiety and depression have gone, and luckily for me, they were al related.
Remove the grog, remove the fog. What i do notice (mostly), is the freedom, the clarity, the pride.
I have alway's been a bit of a big talkin' fool. I'm still a fool of course, but since giving up the booze, i am as it happen's, still big talkin', but the difference is i'm walkin the talk. AF does this to you. I've become a man of my word, and that means something.

great post mr G

[Mrs Donovan]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Brilliant thread.....as always on MWO

[Chillgirl]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

thanks Sheri for the great reminders

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Sheri;879007 wrote: Great thread, G!

What's so wonderful about drinking alcohol anyway?

• It destroys our livers and no wonder...
• It's ethanol, a volatile, flammable, powerful psychoactive drug also found in themometers, industrial clearners, medicinal wipes and fuel.
• It gives us a false sense of courage, peace and happiness.
• It makes us do and say stupid, embarrassing, shameful things.
• It gives us nasty hangovers.
• It causes us to obsess about it until we finally cave and drink compusively, too.
• It makes us nutrionally deficient, fat and bloated.It steals our time, energy and money.It ruins our ability to maintain positive, nuturing relationships with others.It makes us terrible role models for our children.It makes us unproductive employees.It makes us accident prone and dangerous drivers.It destroys us emotionally, spiritually and physically.

These are the things about alochol that I choose to think about now that help to keep me centered in reality. I don't envy normal drinkers because I will never be a normal drinker and don't want to be. Normal drinkers only want 1 or 2 on occasion, I don't and never will. I don't envy the drinkers either because they struggle with all the things listed above to some degree or another and that's not how I want to live anymore. Been there, done that, and just so grateful to finally be sober.

Nope...I don't feel deprived...I feel free!

Sheri

Free indeed, Sheri!

No more chain's, and for me, no more worrying. I still have overdue bill's, and life's drama's coming at me everyday, but i embrace it all. I don't hide from it, and hope it goes away. Nope, i look at it, think, then deal with whatever it is, usually lightfooted and with a smirk. I face it like the true, honest, (and with myself) decent human being i have alway's been, but am now allowing to surface, not dulled, numbed, and shattered by alcohol.

And thank's for the above list. I'm a community health worker these day's, and i'm currently working with a fellow where it wouldn't hurt him to be reminded of all of the above.
Saved to my favourites!

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Yes Mrs. Donovan. There is alway's hope.

[aspman]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

freedom,yer.
my misses had a brain wave at 4;30 on a weekday. 'lets go to the drive in, there are two movies on youd like'. so without a thought of how many beers id had or how manny i could take and still be ok to drive, i said yes. we got home after midnight and i was up at 5 for work, no probs. with al in my life it would have been a disaster...

[prancy]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Wonderful inspiring words on being free! Keep em coming!
Tomorrow I am swimming with the sharks as I have to go to a family event AT A BAR that doesn't even serve bar snacks. It is a tropical drink place that is kind of famous but it is a hole in the wall. We have all sorts of people jumping in with us and then dinner and more drinks! Everyone is so excited. That is, except me! I am dreading it. But with such wonderful encouragement as I just read on this thread, I think I will be fine.

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

prancy;881775 wrote: Wonderful inspiring words on being free! Keep em coming!
Tomorrow I am swimming with the sharks as I have to go to a family event AT A BAR that doesn't even serve bar snacks. It is a tropical drink place that is kind of famous but it is a hole in the wall. We have all sorts of people jumping in with us and then dinner and more drinks! Everyone is so excited. That is, except me! I am dreading it. But with such wonderful encouragement as I just read on this thread, I think I will be fine.

G'day Prancy,

Freedom, Clarity, Pride.

In these types of situation's, if i am newly af, or resolve is not yet developed enough, i just won't go. OR, if i have to, i negotiate with family/friends/the host, that 'i'll be arriving later, and definately leaving early, so my apologies in advance'...etc. This is what i call my exit plan. We must have one at the ready for such occassion's. If you think you'll be strong enough to get through it af, great, but i've found an exit plan to be a lifesaver many times. This strategy may even have saved my life on occassion. Can you take along a little bag of nut's/dried fruit in yer pocket to nibble on?
The danger here, is of course, if we do have a drink, we risk going back to our old routine/habit, and sadly, we usually will hit the booze even harder than we ever have. This is why for me, we must be absolutely ruthless with our plan, and saying no, or yes to an af drink, and yes gang, i'm going home now.


Best wishes, G.

[Chillgirl]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Guitarista;881942 wrote: G'day Prancy,

Freedom, Clarity, Pride.

In these types of situation's, if i am newly af, or resolve is not yet developed enough, i just won't go. OR, if i have to, i negotiate with family/friends/the host, that 'i'll be arriving later, and definately leaving early, so my apologies in advance'...etc. This is what i call my exit plan. We must have one at the ready for such occassion's. If you think you'll be strong enough to get through it af, great, but i've found an exit plan to be a lifesaver many times. This strategy may even have saved my life on occassion. Can you take along a little bag of nut's/dried fruit in yer pocket to nibble on?
The danger here, is of course, if we do have a drink, we risk going back to our old routine/habit, and sadly, we usually will hit the booze even harder than we ever have. This is why for me, we must be absolutely ruthless with our plan, and saying no, or yes to an af drink, and yes gang, i'm going home now.

Best wishes, G.

G - I love your strength! Could do with you sitting on my shoulder at my next big social event....

[prancy]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

Oh I wish I could arrive late and go home early, but this is family....AND I think we are going in a limo so there will be no escape. My plan, however, is to tell the bartender to make me something yummy in the tropical vein and put no AL in it. That way no one will know that I am not drinking and they won't bug me about it. I would like to say I can't go but then I would have the whole family on me. They are all enthusiastic drinkers, especially at a place like this, but no one has my problem. Darn them! Anyway, I have been reading "The Easy Way to Quit Drinking" and listening to meditation tapes, including one on addiction. So at least on this I am a bit ahead. Usually I am dreading such occasions because I know I am going to be miserable. But somehow - must be the reading and the tapes - I am thinking it will be fine and hoping they just don't bore me to death! Thanks for the suggestions. Maybe I will take my computer with me and post the whole time!! Now that would be interesting..... prancy

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

:HTake your computer Prancy? Well, there'll probably be a few there texting away, and maybe on line from their phones too, from what i see in social gathering's these day's.
I used to actually take a small book, and hide away reading during my break at gig's in the early day's, as a back up. Anti-social? sure, but i did my best to be discreet, and it helped a real lot. Not that i'd suggest this technique in all situations! Good idea getting the bartender on side....
The other mental strategy is to go along with the plan to absolutely enjoy yourself, and to seek out interesting people and conversation's, and just go with the flow. Anyway, the Toolbox has a few idea's for these situation's as you probably know.

Hope you have a great time!

[Guitarista]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

aspman;881745 wrote: freedom,yer.
my misses had a brain wave at 4;30 on a weekday. 'lets go to the drive in, there are two movies on youd like'. so without a thought of how many beers id had or how manny i could take and still be ok to drive, i said yes. we got home after midnight and i was up at 5 for work, no probs. with al in my life it would have been a disaster...

Bravo Aspy! Thought's of drinking slowly become less and less, and start to mean less to us the longer we are af in our day to day living for me. Why? Because we have chosen to ditch the booze, we are then free to get on with our lives, and end up being busy taking our lives back, and with that, rebuilding self love, and self respect. Gratitude thinking.

You are fecking rockin it bro!

[aspman]

Gratitude thinking vs. Deprivation thinking.

prancy, i have use the old "i am on antibiotics". people go from pushing AL on you to defending you from the swine .