Suicide
I love my life now too molly and everyone. It's full (LOL - too full some days it seems!) and for the most part, it's happy. I experience life's ups and downs but through the grace of God and my friends here at MWO (and the program in the book) and AA (and the program in THAT book) I am sober and am learning to deal with life on life's terms - the ups AND the downs.
In the last few years of my drinking I was unbelievably hopeless and depressed. The term "functional alcoholic" is almost frightening to me. While my "functionality" became more and more limited, I was still pretty functional to the casual observer. But I was suicidal. I was a prisoner to alcohol and I wanted to stop. But I couldn't stop. I knew I couldn't keep drinking (and didn't want to) but I couldn't imagine or figure out how to NOT drink. Ending my life seemed like a very viable option.
And I had decided how I would do it. With pills. I had a collection of prescription pain killers and muscle relaxants - carefully collected over a couple of years.
I'm so grateful today that something stopped me from following through.
Alcohol IS a powerful depressant, and powerful and gripping addictive substance. Feeling the affects of both of those powers is IMO, not uncommon at all. I do thing we need to be able to talk about it here as an unfortunate subject that is all to familiar for many alcoholics.
I also agree that when one is on the brink of suicide, professional help is called for. There are limits to what we can do over the internet when a person is experiencing a crisis situation. (sadly)
Here's hoping that every single one of us finds our way to a sober life.
DG
I love my life now too molly and everyone. It's full (LOL - too full some days it seems!) and for the most part, it's happy. I experience life's ups and downs but through the grace of God and my friends here at MWO (and the program in the book) and AA (and the program in THAT book) I am sober and am learning to deal with life on life's terms - the ups AND the downs.
In the last few years of my drinking I was unbelievably hopeless and depressed. The term "functional alcoholic" is almost frightening to me. While my "functionality" became more and more limited, I was still pretty functional to the casual observer. But I was suicidal. I was a prisoner to alcohol and I wanted to stop. But I couldn't stop. I knew I couldn't keep drinking (and didn't want to) but I couldn't imagine or figure out how to NOT drink. Ending my life seemed like a very viable option.
And I had decided how I would do it. With pills. I had a collection of prescription pain killers and muscle relaxants - carefully collected over a couple of years.
I'm so grateful today that something stopped me from following through.
Alcohol IS a powerful depressant, and powerful and gripping addictive substance. Feeling the affects of both of those powers is IMO, not uncommon at all. I do thing we need to be able to talk about it here as an unfortunate subject that is all to familiar for many alcoholics.
I also agree that when one is on the brink of suicide, professional help is called for. There are limits to what we can do over the internet when a person is experiencing a crisis situation. (sadly)
Here's hoping that every single one of us finds our way to a sober life.
DG
awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake,
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