15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

[techie]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Meech;894982 wrote: Funny how we remember those good times that AL brought us and we often push the ugly, angry, embarassing memories (which might be even more) away during craving time.

Would we indulge in anything else in life if it brought on so much misery? Crazy.

If and when I look back on the memories of life with AL I must only remember the ugly, the embarassing incidents and the horrid hangovers the next day.

So true Meech. That is indeed the insanity of it!

[Doggygirl]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Johnny, I love your attitude of willingness to throw whatever it takes at the problem. I think it's important that we do *whatever it takes* to stop drinking long enough to sort ourselves out. Whether that "whatever" is AA, MWO, Antabuse, Bac, Rational Recovery, SMART Recovery, Alan Carr's Easy (hahaha) way to stop Drinking - stopping drinking is only the beginning of recovery IMO. Sounds like Antabuse helps you stay solidly off the booze so you can use your other resources such as AA to work on the stuff that will help you build a sober life.

Ukblonde;894567 wrote: I've been suffering again with the naging thoughts. I suspect it's because I've a lot of new situations happening at the moment and it feels as if I could very easily sneak a 'drunk' night without people noticing. Very hard work and once again I was so close to going to a bar or off licence last night. I haven't done but don't know how to stop this current state of mind. If I can I will get to an AA meeting today as that might help especially in current circumstances.

I can relate to these urges that come in times of stress. Have confidence that with enough sober time, those urges will shift to chocolate or donuts or something. That's what I battle these days - food urges in times of stress! But I'll take that over AL urges all day long.

My AA "Step Coach" often says "if all else fails reach out your hand to a newcomer." Helping others is such an important tenet IMO, whether one is active in AA or not. We do that here at MWO, but like so many other life experiences, face to face is different for me than the internet. I don't know why that seemed important to toss out there, but there you have it.

Urges DO pass but I know stretches like this can be frustrating. Beats the alternative though...

DG

[Meech]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Well put Doggygirl!

[Meech]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Johnnyh

Will you be putting on an 8th point in the next day or so? I will be leaving for a trip in 2 days and won't have access to MWO for 8 DAYS. So I am taking all your points with me. Just want to get as much good advice on my hands while I'm away from all you great people!
:h

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Yeah. Meech. The embarassing, bad moments couldn't have beeen thaaaat bad, right? Those type of thoughts replace the reality all to quickly during craving time and then the memories of the good times overtake. OR, well the bad memories were bad, but I've had some AF time now, I can handle my 2 or 3 drinks and relive the good times. How easy we lie to ourselves. I think distracting the mind is the best thing to do. Because if you start letting yourselves get into arguments with yourself you can only be the loser, right?!

I love that thought DG of reaching out when you feel vulnerable. Reaching out to others like newcomers leaves you feeling so much stronger and good. I must definately keep that in mind.

New point coming up next Meech

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

8. Point

1. Cultivate continued acceptance of the fact that your choice is between unhappy, drunken drinking and doing without just one small drink.
2. Cultivate enthusiastic gratitude that you have had the good fortune of finding out what was wrong with you before it was too late.
3. EXPECT as being natural and inevitable, that for a period of time (and it may be a long one), you will recuringly experience.
(a) The conscious, nagging craving for a drink.
(b) The sudden, all but compelling impluse just to take a drink.
(c) The craving, not for a drinks as such, but for the soothing glow and warmth a drink or two once gave you.
4. Remember that the times you don't want a drink are the times in which to build up the strength not to take one when you do want it.
5. Develop and rehearse a daily plan of thinking and acting by which you will live the day without taking a drink, regardless of what may upset you or how hard the old urge for a drink may hit you.
6. Don't for a split second allow yourself to think: 'Isn't it a pity or a mean injustice that I can't take a drink like so-called normal people'.
7. Don't allow yourself to either think about or talk about any real or imgagined pleasure you once did get from drinking

8. Don't permit yourself to think a drink or two would make some bad situation better, or at least easier to live with. Substitute the thought : 'One drink will make it worse - One drink will mean a drunk.'

[Guest]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Not quite on the topic but thought I should update my posts. Last night I attended AA in the city I was visiting. Was running late and ended up having to direct a taxi driver to the venue which was in a large, obvious building!!!Anyway I did share albeit nervously saying I was struggling, had forgotten how bad things were and I got a lot of support. Felt a lot better afterwards. Only thing was I then had to go out to the event I had gone specifically for. Being very nervous I immediately wanted a drink but the good thing was it passed in about 5 minutes. Had 2 lemonades and ended up meeting a bloke who also wasn't drinking. He told me he simply didn't like getting drunk full stop..........we had a really good dance too for over an hour followed by a long chat.

So lots of things in there I thought might be useful to not just myself - and see 'normal' people don't always drink either!!!!

[Meech]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Uk Blonde - Yes normal people don't always drink either. No kidding heh? Well brilliant job last night. You got through the cravings and sounded like you had a very lovely evening too! :thumbs:

Johnnyh - LOVE #8

8. Don't permit yourself to think a drink or two would make some bad situation better, or at least easier to live with. Substitute the thought : 'One drink will make it worse - One drink will mean a drunk.'

I just put that one on my "cheat sheet" for my trip. One drink will mean a drunk. 100% guaranteed. That's one thing I can count on. One = Drunk. Simple enough equation.

I'm going to stick with this one 0 drinks = health, respect, true happiness, no regrets!

Thank you so much. Your thread has helped me so much! :h :l

A very, very grateful Meechie :armsaround:

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Thanks Meech!!! All the very best for your trip. Stay safe

[Doggygirl]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Meech, I think it's awesome that you are putting together a tool kit for the road! I'm right there with you. One drink = drunk (one drink?? hahahaha) And for me, drinking absolutely makes everything worse, not better. So there will be no drinking for me today.

UK, you demonstrate time and time again that you are willing to do whatever it takes to stay sober. For another day, it worked!! YAY!!

On "normal drinkers." My husband is a normie so I get to see on a regular basis what that is...and what I NEVER was from the very beginning. He says "no" to drinking more often than yes. And if he DOES have "a" drink, it's just that - "a" drink. I have seen him drunk ONE time in 12 years. And I guarantee that the "one drunk" in his normie mind will stick with him, and it will never happen again. Unlike me who touched the hot stove again and again thinking somehow the result would be different.

I am who I am, and he is who he is. Our differences in how we relate to AL have nothing to do with our character as people. The fact that I'm an alcoholic doesn't make me a bad person. Acting like a bad person is what made me a bad person as a result of AL.

DG

[Meech]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Take care guys! Look forward to catching up on the rest of the points when I return with 10 days AF under my belt.

All the best to everyone here!

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Great attitude DG!!

My wife is also a 'normal' drinker. And the difference has always been very clear to me. Similarly to your husband. She can have a bubble bath and have 'a' glass of wine. That's maybe once in a couple of weeks. We can go to a restaurant once in a while. She'll order a 250ml caraffe of wine (that was this week), and left half standing on the table because she didn't quite like the taste of it.

Definately a big difference. I could have never been like that. I would have never let any AL go to 'waste'. No matter how bad the wine would have tasted. I would have had not one drink but a couple more afte at least. Actually thinking back, I don't know if I ever was at a stage even in the beginning when I would just have one drink.

I was alwasy going to land up a problem drinker and should have never had that first drink years ago. So the great news now is, as long as I don't have that one drink, I'm fine. If I have the one, I will be back to square one.

I'm getting to a stage now where I can say I do not envy my wife. We are just different, just like you said DG. I am glad that she can just have a drink every couple of weeks and isn't a problem drinker. I love her so I won't envy her. I will rather be grateful that she's safe.

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

9. Point

1. Cultivate continued acceptance of the fact that your choice is between unhappy, drunken drinking and doing without just one small drink.
2. Cultivate enthusiastic gratitude that you have had the good fortune of finding out what was wrong with you before it was too late.
3. EXPECT as being natural and inevitable, that for a period of time (and it may be a long one), you will recuringly experience.
(a) The conscious, nagging craving for a drink.
(b) The sudden, all but compelling impluse just to take a drink.
(c) The craving, not for a drinks as such, but for the soothing glow and warmth a drink or two once gave you.
4. Remember that the times you don't want a drink are the times in which to build up the strength not to take one when you do want it.
5. Develop and rehearse a daily plan of thinking and acting by which you will live the day without taking a drink, regardless of what may upset you or how hard the old urge for a drink may hit you.
6. Don't for a split second allow yourself to think: 'Isn't it a pity or a mean injustice that I can't take a drink like so-called normal people'.
7. Don't allow yourself to either think about or talk about any real or imgagined pleasure you once did get from drinking
8. Don't permit yourself to think a drink or two would make some bad situation better, or at least easier to live with. Substitute the thought : 'One drink will make it worse - One drink will mean a drunk.'

9. Minimise your situation. Others have greater problems, how joyful such people would be if their problem could be solved by just not taking one little drink today. Think gratefully how lucky you are to have so simple and small a problem.

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

Sheri;885798 wrote: There are many horrible, terrible things to have to live with in the world and not drinking is not one of them. If not drinking is the worst thing that I ever have to overcome in my life, well then, I consider myself very blessed.

Sheri

Sheri posted this close to the beginning of the thread. Right in the spirit of the latest point, isn't it?!

If you think of Alcoholism as a disability. Take for instance a blind man, someone mute. What would they give to rid themselves of their disabilities?! All we have to do is not have the first drink and we're rid of our disability, for the time being at least.

[johnnyh]

15 Points to consider when confronted with the urge to take a Drink!

10. Point

1. Cultivate continued acceptance of the fact that your choice is between unhappy, drunken drinking and doing without just one small drink.
2. Cultivate enthusiastic gratitude that you have had the good fortune of finding out what was wrong with you before it was too late.
3. EXPECT as being natural and inevitable, that for a period of time (and it may be a long one), you will recuringly experience.
(a) The conscious, nagging craving for a drink.
(b) The sudden, all but compelling impluse just to take a drink.
(c) The craving, not for a drinks as such, but for the soothing glow and warmth a drink or two once gave you.
4. Remember that the times you don't want a drink are the times in which to build up the strength not to take one when you do want it.
5. Develop and rehearse a daily plan of thinking and acting by which you will live the day without taking a drink, regardless of what may upset you or how hard the old urge for a drink may hit you.
6. Don't for a split second allow yourself to think: 'Isn't it a pity or a mean injustice that I can't take a drink like so-called normal people'.
7. Don't allow yourself to either think about or talk about any real or imgagined pleasure you once did get from drinking
8. Don't permit yourself to think a drink or two would make some bad situation better, or at least easier to live with. Substitute the thought : 'One drink will make it worse - One drink will mean a drunk.'
9. Minimise your situation. Others have greater problems, how joyful such people would be if their problem could be solved by just not taking one little drink today. Think gratefully how lucky you are to have so simple and small a problem.

10. Cultivate and woo enjoyment of sobriety.
a) how good it is to be free of shame and guilt
b) how good it is to be free of the consequences of a drunk just ended or of a coming drunk you've been never able to prevent before.
c) how good it is to be free of what people have been thinking and whispering about you, and of their mingled pity and contempt
d) How good it is to be free of fear.