Friends who drink, what will they say???

[hazeleyes]

Hi Everyone
Just wanted to share some insight we had recently.
My husband and I gave up drinking April 18th 2010. It has been an up and down battle but we are both very happy to still be AF and enjoying a better life.

We have been feeling nervous about family who drink heavily and how we were going to interact with them when they came over. Yesterday we told this one family couple who were heavy drinkers that we had given up drinking, and then waited for the negative comments...instead they told us that a friend of theirs was on death's door because he wouldn't give up drinking. They had decided to cut back dramatically and now they only go to BYO restaurants and take 1/2 a bottle of wine with them. Previously they drank 2 bottles each at dinner. They congratulated us on quitting and thought we were doing great. They said we could all have a great sober time together now. This was a big, great, surprise to us.

There are so many comments about fearing what others think when we give up AL. I felt this way as well. Instead maybe our friends and family would be glad if we told them we had given up, as they have wanted to as well... just like this couple.

Best wishes to you all in your journey.
Hazeleyes

[Gaia]

Friends who drink, what will they say???

Hello Hazel,
Congratulations to you and your husband on giving up AL! It sounds like you are both doing well and feeling good. That is truly a blessing!

Your tale about your friends is a great story about how the other voices don't matter - what matters most is our own center. There are many many people out there fighting for their own sobriety, and most are not really interested in what others are drinking or not. Some, when confronted with a friend or family member who does not drink, will react by talking about how they need to cut back or quit themselves.

Bottom line - have no fear! Sobriety is here!

[rubywillow]

Friends who drink, what will they say???

SOOOO many times we worry so about other's reactions. It's OUR lives we should be concerned with. Congraulations on a wonderful job of saving your lives.
BTW: I lost a friend of over 50 years this week. The last person I would have DREAMED would have died from AL. Her family felt so much shame they never talked about her problem, and she didn't admit it till she was too weak to sip water. They still have not published a death announcement. Enough said.

[Chillgirl]

Friends who drink, what will they say???

I was actually just discussing this topic yesteday on another thread and used the quote what you think about me is none of my business. We have to do whatever is right for ourselves in all aspects of our lives not just regarding AL and we can't control the good oppinions of others. However I know in the beginning it did concern me before I realized my sobriety was was the only thing that mattered. Yours is a great story with now what looks like a perfect socializing solution, just be careful if your friends do still drink some AL that you don't get tempted to do the same. I have to say I too have been plesantly suprised by the reaction of many people who I thought would be negative, many have said well done me and confessed they would love to cut back or quit. Slowly I think people are waking up and seeing the destruction AL causes in our lives. Congratulations to you and your husband, keep up the great work!