Menapause

[sick of being sick]

So I go to my yearly gyn exam and she tells me I'm going through menapause. HELLO ... I'm only 49, but she's probably right. My emotions are all over the place these days. I've tried to rationalize my feelings away and just ignore the diagnosis. I even threw away a prescription for hormones because damn, I don't want to go through all that. So here I am today trying my BEST to have a better attitude and a good day but damn, I can't stop crying. It feels as if every time I get up and try to deal with life, it immediately kicks me back down. I'm getting so damn tired and weak that I almost want to give up and just lay there on the ground and rest. Here I am trying with every thing that is in me to live a sober life and now I've got to deal with this. Are you kidding me? But the problem is not going away, so girls, please give me some advice. Have you been there or are you there now, how the hell do I get out of this? Please show me the exit! Thanks for your posts.

[Grateful]

Menapause

Vicki-I'm here for you, girlfriend. You know all about my "issues" - we will keep each other afloat!! There are so many days that I don't want to get out of bed - or wish that I could "escape". But I know I have to ...for my kids & my granddaughter. It does seem like there is always something coming along and kicking us down....but that's why you have all of your friends here to help pick you up. You are loved by so many here. I told you before - you are so BEAUTIFUL!!! If it's time for menopause...at least you'll be the most beautiful woman going thru it! I'm sure others who have gone thru this will post...I think I did go thru it - but not sure....I had a hysterectomy about 12 yrs ago, so I probably did. I didn't get any hormone pills to take, though, so I don't know about them.

Anyway, don't give up. Take a deep breath, go for a walk, read a book. Start again tomorrow.

I'll talk to you soon.

Luv ya.:l:l

[Chillgirl]

Menapause

SOBS - I cant help you from experience but there is a great book called THE WISDOM OF THE MENOPAUSE: The complete guide to women's health by DR CHRISTIANE NORTHRUP
its available from Amazon. She is a fantastic Dr who specializes in women's health and I have heard her speak many times.

[Cinders]

Menapause

SOBS,

Unfortunately, I drank my way through most of menopause. I always told my husband I never knew if I was having hot flashes or alcohol withdrawals. sigh

I am 53.

I can't speak to HRT as I smoke and my doctor won't even consider it as long as I smoke. She figures a few ups and downs are probably not as bad as a stroke. I have to agree. Amazing it is more important to me to smoke than to feel good.

Anyhow, menopause is a normal part of life. It isn't life kicking you down at all. It is actually a good time of life. Many women have changed their lives for the better during and after menopause. I will try to Google and get you some links. It will hearten you.

I know the emotional rollercoaster is tough, I had one of those all my life because of serious PMS issues. In many ways, I am much better off now than I was pre-menopausal.

It will get better. Trust me. My mama said so, too, and she was right.

Hang in there.

Love,
Cindi

[rubywillow]

Menapause

You know I'm here for you, little girl. Yes, it's a bitch, and makes us one too. With everything else going on with you, another blow. But we're gonna ride this roller coaster, together. Just hang on, close your eyes if you need to, and lean on whats true in your life. You know how to reach me. And you ARE beautiflu!

[rubywillow]

Menapause

chillgirl;886862 wrote: SOBS - I cant help you from experience but there is a great book called THE WISDOM OF THE MENOPAUSE: The complete guide to women's health by DR CHRISTIANE NORTHRUP
its available from Amazon. She is a fantastic Dr who specializes in women's health and I have heard her speak many times.

Chill, I have her books and CD's. She's GREAT!

[Chillgirl]

Menapause

Ruby isnt she amazing!! I think SOBS would get alot from her

[rubywillow]

Menapause

Yes! Brilliant, and believable. She has such a great series of books, and SUCH a fab speaker!

[KateH1]

Menapause

Chill, this is exactly what I was going to recomend! Dr. Northrup is the bomb! She truly knows what she is talking about, from the perspective of being a woman, a doctor and also a lifetime, since childhood working with natural forms of healing. She was raised on Adelle Davis and other early writers on natural health!

One other thing that I think is critical, is our internal attitudes towards menapause, and other issues. If we believe it is awful etc, most likely it will be. If we look at it as just another step in life, we will probably do much better.

Good Luck with this SOBS.....honestly, it is not really bad at all!

[mollyka]

Menapause

Cinders - meet your sister! I too am 53 and think I lost the menopause somewhere in there in my drinking life, it just sort of happened and as they say ' there it was gone'!!!
KateH1 I 100% agree with you, I have a sister whose menopause went on for about 10 years - she revelled in it, she dined out on it, her husband and family suffered all those years thro it, she was such a pain in the arse and nobody could say anything because ' oh my goodness I'm menopausal!!!'
Not trying to make too light of it but it is just another twist and turn in life.
Molly

[rubywillow]

Menapause

Wonderful post, Kate. Women judge themselves in such a way of sexuality viewed by men, we feel we lose credibility after 'a certain age'. It IS not so. I could really get on a rant about the behavior of young women these days, but I won't. This is another passage in our lives. We are human, we love the adoration, both men and women, of the people in our presence. But there is SO much more to us, so much people don't, or can't, see to us beyond our youth. That is sad, and SUCH a loss to those who place so much value on youth. An epitaph I read in High School by Edna St. Vincent Milay, has stayed with me over the decades. "As you are, so once was I. As I am, so shall you be."
It's not to be depressing, I don't think. It's fact. We all age, change, evolve. If our whole being rests on our youth (firmness, bikini) we are not real people. I have youth all around me, and it is beautiful. But my idols are the people in my life who were SO beautiful, graceful, wise, as they went through life.
I know this doesn't help you physically, but I hope emotionally , mentally, you understand and accept that we have uncomfortable changes as we go through life. You are beautiful, and I SO admire your work ethic, your outlook. This 'diagnosis' does not change you. It is another step on your journey.

[KateH1]

Menapause

mollyka;886914 wrote: KateH1 I 100% agree with you, I have a sister whose menopause went on for about 10 years - she revelled in it, she dined out on it, her husband and family suffered all those years thro it, she was such a pain in the arse and nobody could say anything because ' oh my goodness I'm menopausal!!!'
Not trying to make too light of it but it is just another twist and turn in life.
Molly

Thanks, Molly, I have known those women as well.......so annoying!

I saw Dr. Northrop speak in Denver a couple of years ago, she said, remember ladies, Meryl Streep made more movies, and some of her best, during menopause!!

I also love what Northrup has to say about this period of time truly being the Age of Wisdom for women! It certainly can be, it is up to each one of us, how we choose to handle it!

[Grateful]

Menapause

Vicki-for you....I heard this on the way home from work and thought you might like it too.

CMT : Videos : Rascal Flatts : Unstoppable


:l

[KateH1]

Menapause

rubywillow;886915 wrote: Wonderful post, Kate. Women judge themselves in such a way of sexuality viewed by men, we feel we lose credibility after 'a certain age'. It IS not so. I could really get on a rant about the behavior of young women these days, but I won't. This is another passage in our lives. We are human, we love the adoration, both men and women, of the people in our presence. But there is SO much more to us, so much people don't, or can't, see to us beyond our youth. That is sad, and SUCH a loss to those who place so much value on youth. An epitaph I read in High School by Edna St. Vincent Milay, has stayed with me over the decades. "As you are, so once was I. As I am, so shall you be."
It's not to be depressing, I don't think. It's fact. We all age, change, evolve. If our whole being rests on our youth (firmness, bikini) we are not real people. I have youth all around me, and it is beautiful. But my idols are the people in my life who were SO beautiful, graceful, wise, as they went through life.
I know this doesn't help you physically, but I hope emotionally , mentally, you understand and accept that we have uncomfortable changes as we go through life. You are beautiful, and I SO admire your work ethic, your outlook. This 'diagnosis' does not change you. It is another step on your journey.

Great post, Ruby, and thank you my friend! Frankly, I have had no issues with men or women at this time in my life! This is truly the best time of my life!:l

[rubywillow]

Menapause

Me either, Kate. I get the disparaging asides here often, because I'm not always in old-lady grandma mode. The wisdom I have gained, the generations I have experienced, are my guiding star. Before her death, I sat with my granny, who was born to Native American mother on the reservation in Oklahoma territory (makes me sound ancient, doesn't it! :H) as she unbound her braided bun and brushed her waist-length hair. After having 11 babies, surviving her nutty husband and his suicide, she still took pride that she'd never cut her hair and had her own teeth. THAT sustains me. THAT is reality. And I don't take pride in the physical trappings of life. I know I can do anything, at any age, so menopause is just another bump started by 'men'.