Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

[tumadre]

I'm not sure how to explain this, but thought that the truth might help...I've posted before, under OnMyWay, a few times. I shared a few personal things, but didn't *really* get into any down & dirty personal stuff. I tried to be witty, just like the Muffins, so I could fit in with the fun gang. I wanted so much to just jump right in and be just like everyone else on this board...you know: moderate drinkers, a few struggles here and there, but warm, witty and supportive people that I'd be proud to call my friends. In truth, I was still hiding. And I felt left out. When JerryBear screamed out for attention, it echoed my small cry, "yea! what about the rest of us who are just joining and need to find our way in?" I've been so afraid of revealing personal clues as to my identity, so I wouldn't reveal who I really am so that no one could identify me if they lived in the community that I live in, that I've virtually muffled myself from sharing any sort of important life stuff! But guess what!!! They're here for the same reasons I am! DUH!
So, I've decided to re-enlist with the username I usually use for email lists: tumadre. It's an inside joke between my daughters and I, meaning "Your mom". (We use it as a comeback for all kinds of things...it's sarcasm). If at any point I write something and it sounds a little off and not quite loving, it's sarcasm...
I'm 46, Registered Nurse (Childbirth, Cancer Research, Home Care), now at the beginning of owning a bookstore. 2nd marriage to an RN (he's in the operating room, which suits him fine, since he used to be a general contractor, and the tools are pretty similar . 2 daughters, 19 & 16.
Enough with the book. I have so much more to say about drinking, family, the whole shebang...I've read almost every word on this site, and devoured every bit of wisdom, pain and wonder written...there are some amazing people here, and I'd be proud to be amongst them.
I just hope that I'm accepted after changing identities, cause it's the real me now, good and bad...And I want to be here to stay. :h
:crossed:

[tawnyfrog]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hi and, again ...:welcome:

[Suzanna]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hi Tumadre, welcome also. I am new too but been around awhile. Working up to sharing some more details on what my drinking problems really are. The estimates are that there are millions of problem drinkers in the world, but only a few thousand have made it to this site (so far!). I read yesterday on here someone's complaint, where are the new bies, it seems just the same folks posting. They're right, it's not fair for me to read and not post or give back in that way. I love reading everything on here, this journey we're all on, we're on together. Suz

[tumadre]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Tawny-
You've always been welcoming, no matter who has been the newbie-it's greatly appreciated!
Suz-
I hope that by posting you will be setting an example to other newbies to jump right in. Thank you for responding to me.
Tumadre

[InnerStrength]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hi Tumadre
Welcome! Great to have you on board! Are you interested in mods do you say? Jump on over to the mods boards (monthly moderation) and join our crew - (you mentioned the muffins) - but only if you want to (no pressure of course - you are welcome welcome welcome!!!!!
Hugs
Jen

[lushy]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

I was just getting ready to write what Kate posted. The only way to not feel like an outsider is to post. We are all outsiders when we first come on here. And since you mentioned the muffins being witty I would like to point out that we are not all about fun and games. There are very serious discussions that go on over there as well and we welcome it all. We are all a very welcoming bunch so if any of you ever has anything you need to talk about, whether it be on topic or not PLEASE jump in.

[Saint Jude]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hola! Tu Madre! Como Esta? Ok, that's about the extent of my Espanglish... without gettin myself into mucho problemas! Oh Yeah! Bievenidos!:welcome:

This is a wonderful place, full of very supportive people, with a lot of strength, humor, hope, advice,.. pretty much (hopefully), whatever we need to get us through! Welcome Aboard. Keep reading & posting, looking forword to getting to know you better.

:l Judie

[shedot]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hola and welcome,

I'm not really new, but I'm back, I seem to kind of fall in and out of this place, or that seems to be my history thus far, I haven't shared that much come to think of it, but I've asked a lot of questions. I've screamed too, when I thought no one was listening. I was wrong, everyone one is listening, just not everyone has something to say or they are afraid to say it. I'm afraid to say stuff a lot of the time, don't know why though....
Anyway, welcome to the site....

[fsophiah]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Sometimes I think we start coming here, and it's a little like junior high. We want to be in with the cool crowd because there are some people who are really visible, and there are some who seem to be having so much fun. I like the fun. But I also have been reminding myself lately that the door to this palace is pain and self-loathing and fear. Also, there are people here who are working at trying to do the most difficult thing they've ever done. I remember reading an article in [I]More [I] magazine about Jamie Lee Curtis, and she said that stopping drinking alcohol was the most difficult thing she had ever done. All I could think of was that movie with Arnold Swarzenneger where she was hanging from an airplane. Now, I know she wasn't hanging from a real airplane, but I like to think of it that way because it reminds me that what we are doing is hard. Some of us are depressed. Some of us feel like outsiders. So I appreciate what your honesty, and I think it's a message that we all need to remember and take to heart. Thanks for the reminder.

[MKR]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Profoundly said Sophiah - what a great visual!

Welcome tumadre and Suzanna - I think Laura posted this statement over on mods today. You get back what you put in. Please be sure to post, read the posts, get the book, supps and CD's - consider doing the program with a personal commitment to yourself. I think it can be a hard task made much easier by all the support that is given here.

Yes, there are quite a few very funny muffin mods! They all welcome you!

Hugs and good luck
Mary

[tumadre]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

THANK YOU...

So much, everyone, for the gracious replies...I DO feel welcome, and look forward to sharing the good and the bad. I guess I'll be on Mods the most, cause that's my plan. You guys are awesome
:h

[southernbelle47]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hi Tumadre and Sus....:welcome:

Sometimes chat can feel hard to break into because people are usually already talking went you log in but posting usually gets everybody's attention.
And YES.........please share honestly what is on your heart because that is the only way to get help. I have found that most people here are very understanding. Every once in a while someone will not register and say things they are afraid to say in person, but that is rare.
Some of us that have been around awhile will get protective of "our" friends if they say something in what we perceive to be mean spirited..
It's just like family here.......we can "kick" their butt, but not an "outsider" that won't register!

If you need encouragement to do a period of abs, come down to monthly abs!

Nancy:l

[wwbarb]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

A lot of us just want someone to jump in and "take care of us", make us stop drinking and tell us it's okay. A lot of us are loney to start with. When we feel like outsiders, it is usually because we are spending a lot of time on the sidelines, waiting for someone to take us under their wing. But they can't do that unless we reach out.

I have "met" so many wonderful people on this site. I have been on other interent support groups, much smaller than this, and virtually ignored when I reach out. That has never happened here. We are emotional messes to start out with (well, I guess I am speaking for myself) so it's hard to ask.

I just hope that I am giving even a small portion of what I am getting back to you wonderful people.

:h

[C]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Tumadre -- love the name. Welcome. So well said Sohpia. Thank you.
Luv, C

[Nina328]

Under New Management (Posted under Starting Out also)

Hi!

Hi Tumadre,

Great Name! I think your post was awesome. I am dragging myself back after about a 4 month break and it is like starting all over again. Especially since the site format has changed.

I admit that I was a pretty big poster here for about 9 months and loved it. I had the best time and was on top of the world. It was really great being "normal" if you will. This place lets you be normal amoungst the outcasts. Don't take that the wrong way.

We all know why we are here, but this place gives us a chance to let our hair down just a bit and we know we our around our own kind so to speak. These people understand us and it is ok to have fun and be cheeky even though we are struggling. This is what makes this group so great.

Feel free to share everything with us. This is the only way to be free.

Take care and welcome to your way out.

-Nina