How do you work on your Sobriety?

[OverIt2007]

Hi Everyone,

I know this may sound like a stupid question, but for those of you who have had some long term sobriety, I am curious just what do you do to work on your sobriety? I have seriously seriously considered taking Antabuse, so therefore, of course I can not drink. Im wondering what do I do then? I mean, I will be sober, but whats next? I would hate to think that I would just be a "dry drunk". I think that is setting yourself up for failure.

Im just curious what steps some of you have taken after getting sober? Besides just being sober, what other changes did you make in your life?


Thanks for answering!

[Doggygirl]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Hi overit. IMO, the question you raise is an excellent one. For all of my adult life, drinking consumed a very disproportionate share of my time (planning, drinking, recovering from drinking). During the last 10 or so years of my drinking career, AL was really all consuming for me. Anything else I managed to accomplish besides drinking was incidental. I was a daily drinker and in the end, I started as soon as I got out of bed if at all possible.

So yes. I've had to make some dramatic changes and it didn't happen automatically.

At first I had to make lists. Things I needed or wanted to do. I had to proactively think about a "new routine" planning everything from sunrise to sun down. I had to change my people, places and things.

AA helps me a lot with that. It has also connected me with new non-drinking friends who are ahead of me on the path. I've discovered a lot of "normal living" by associating with other ex-drinkers. (I know AA is not for everyone - just sharing what has worked for me)

The good news I am finding, is that once my wheels really got rolling in my new sober life, my days are MORE than full. There is so much I WANT to do that I'm really having to make choices now. The long, endless days of nothing are over. They can be for you too.

It was really scary for me too. But that gets better.

DG

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

I KNEW you would be the first to reply DoggyGirl, LOL. Thank you.

I know that getting sober is just the first step (still working on step 1 here) and that in order for me to KEEP sobriety is going to require some changes. If nothing changes then nothing changes. I guess I just get a little overwhelmed at what changes I will have to and need to make. Its almost like where do I start? Perhaps I am getting a little too far ahead of myself, but just curious what is working for some of you others. I appreciate all of your answers!

Also, I am very well aware that my drinking is holding me back from so many areas of my life. Its all connected I am discovering. There is no doubt in my mind what so ever that if I had not gotton wrapped up with a drinking problem, my life would be so different. I would be different.

Doggygirl, I tried AA a few times, but honestly, I never gave it a chance. My problem was that when I was in AA, I was sober, so therefore didnt really feel like I needed it. Sick thinking isnt it???

[papmom3]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Hey Over-great question!! I don't think I qualify as a long term abstainer but as a fairly newbie abstainer maybe I can help.
One of the things that has helped is that I keep foremost in my mind my very last hangover and how horrible I felt and how I wasted a whole day that was my one day off that week, and how I didn't get ANYTHING done that I had planned. Whenever I think about drinking, I ask myself: Is what is going to happen the next day worth the one hour of sweet numbness and artificial relaxation?
I also visualize in my mind how the evening will go: I buy the bottle, I have the first glass and get that warm feeling all over and want it to continue so I have another glass. Now I'm getting a little tipsy and I like it so here goes glass 3. I feel so good, WTF, might as well have glass 4 and then I fast forward to the next morning and the empty bottle on the counter ( a large bottle, not the 4 glass size). See, I can NEVER visualize myself having just one or two glasses (except if I'm out at dinner somewhere-wierd). I just can't no matter how hard I try.
I don't really make lists of things to do, but I do know that every nite, after dinner, after checking this site and possibly watching a bit of TV, I will crawl into bed with my book and read until I drop off. And that, for some reason is so comforting to me and I really look forward to doing it.

Oh, and probably the most important 2 times of the day for me is in the morning when I drink my All One smoothie and take my morning supps and then again at nite when I take the night time supps after dinner. I truly believe these have been what has made this journey doable for me.

My recent diagnosis of kidney disease (really??) and Diabetes II has just reinforced my decision to remain AF for life. I really enjoy waking up every morning with out the horrible fatigue, headache, fuzziness etc (and that was when I WASN'T hungover!!). In fact, I was sitting here at work this morning looking back at all the times I sat here the past 2 years not really here because I was either hungover or close to it. I couldn't remember telephone numbers I had just looked at when dialing, the computer screen would be horribly blurry and I would be shaking. I also didn't really care what I looked like since hardly anyone would ever come in. And then of course I couldn't wait until 5pm when I could do it all over again because I had the next day off and it didn't matter if I was hungover or not.

I don't know if this is what you're looking for or not. I truly wish you the best of luck and I hope you are able to accomplish whatever it is that you really want.

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Thanks Papsmom, yes, that was of help... thank you. Im really glad your doing so well now with the not drinking. Ill get there too... sigh.. someday and hopefully soon.

[Doggygirl]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Overit, I never ever ever understood or tried to live "one day at a time" before getting sober. Truly staying "one day at a time" to the best of my ability keeps most things in life from getting too overwhelming. If I try to imagine ALL the changes I want to make over the long haul - YIKES!! I try to keep my thinking in terms of what I would like to experience today.

I always thought "AA is NOT for ME!!!!" and had I gone before I was ready for it, I would have freaked out. I think it only makes sense if you are ready. I guess AL had to kick my ass one last time.

DG

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Hey Doggygirl,

I really do not have anything against AA. I wish I would have given it more of a chance, but like you said, maybe I just wasnt ready. I could always try it again. At one of the AA meetings I went to, a womens only meet, I was amazed at ALL the women! Wow, that was eye opening for me!

Yes, I think ODAT is the best way too who needs to get completely overwhelmed! But sometimes I think BIG steps are in order too. I just have to get my toes off of the diving board and dive in!

[mama bear]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

I am here OverIt.....whatever you want to do...whenever you want to do it...
I am committed to turning my life around...I am tired of the guilt, shame, lying, hangovers, wasted money, anxiety, panice, everything else....
I will keep u posted on bac....and meanwhile and I here....

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Thats good to know Mama!! Im really grateful to have you all!

I hope the bac is your ticket!!

[spuddleduck]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

im also still fairly new on the sober stakes. for me things have changed naturally. i dont want to hang about with people drinking or should i say drunk, im ok with people having a couple of drinks with me. i always used to be quite a busy person just doing things, gardening, cooking little hobbies, exercising and i made a list of these things and started slowly getting back into them. im loving it. i spend more time with people doing stuff as opposed to sitting around drinking. and im being kind to myself, just little things like something special in the bath or a nice meal (money saved from AL). anything (within reason) that makes me feel good, and these days without AL lots of things make me feel good. i dont look too far into the future as its scary, still just focussing one day at a time.... and some of these 'one days' are bloody marvelous

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Good for you Spuds!!!

I hate beating myself up over and over again. I tend to be much nicer and kinder to myself with some sober time. I actually even like myself a bit then too!

[Guest]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Spot The Pissheads

If you'd like some motivation I suggest you take a seat in a public area (like a supermarket) and do some people watching. Pay attention to the general appearance of passers-by. Look out especially for the lame and raddled...chances are it's the booze that got them into that state. Works for me.

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

There are several Walmarts close to me... I think that would work!

[Doggygirl]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

You don't have to leave your desk to People Watch Walmart... Funny Pictures at WalMart Photos

(ok, somebody had to do it)

DG

[1967]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Truly staying "one day at a time" to the best of my ability keeps most things in life from getting too overwhelming.

Agreed, I can handle one day at a time, forever seems insurmountable!