How do you work on your Sobriety?

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Thank you 1967. ODAT for sure.

DoggyGirl, LOL! Your hillarious! Now I CAN people watch at Walmart!

True story! One time I was at Walmart and I hear someone arguing on their phone. It was Linda Hogan, Hulk Hogans wife in full crazy atire and makeup. Her 20 year old boyfriend was tagging along behind her like a little dog.


HA HA! You know your a loser when you end up on above said website!!!

[Doggygirl]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

LOL - you brought back some boating memories for me. Up and down the intercoastal. Does Hulk still have that house...well, BIG house along the waterway? We used to see him out on his dock with a little blond kid. I was never a Hulk or wrestling follower so I'm not even sure if it was a girl or boy. Probably only a few years old at the time.

I'm glad I don't drink like that any more. But I could do with some intercoastal boating I think.

DG

[Zeppie2]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

hi Overit - great question

I am just over 10 months sober, and quite frankly the mere thought of what I was like when I was drinking for those many years is enough to stop me even thinking about drinking again. Stories of my escapades still haunt me on the odd occassion while socialising.

I enjoy going out now, I never used to go out much before, I was usually too drunk to even contemplate going out by the time normal people finished work. Now I enjoy being the one who can get people home safely and can have a wonderful following day without having to drink a hangover away again.

[Marshy]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Hi Overit,

I took Antabuse in my early days. Before I decided to take it, I found I could go a week, two weeks, even a month without drinking but I would always fall back and start drinking again. I thought Antabuse would *force* me to have some sober time. And it did. It gave me some guaranteed time without drinking so I could start getting my head together - and start working on a plan, essentially.

With a clearish head, I then started counselling, meditation classes and - one of the main things for me - joined a gym and exercised every day even if I really didn't want to. (And I had hardly ever been in a gym before so that was a big change).

I was very strict with myself about doing something every single day to work on my sobriety. On the odd days that I didn't exercise, I made sure that I meditated or read something helpful or some other thing.

I'm less strict these days in that I'd don't have a mental checklist about what I've done today to maintain my sobriety. But a lot of it has naturally become part of my routine anyway (especially the exercise) so I don't really have to think about - I just do it.

I thought at first that I wouldn't know how to fill my time if I wasn't drinking - it was a BIG part of my life. But of course there are so many other options available when you're not living life in a haze of alcohol.

I like the title of your thread - it is work, but the rewards are more than worth it.

[one2many]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Sheri;896156 wrote: Hi Overit,

Here are some of the changes that sobriety has brought to my life:

I'm no longer obsessed with drinking 24/7.
I don't go to liquor stores or bars.
I don't spend time with people who drink.
I don't hide empty bottles or worry about where to put them.
I don't lie anymore.
I no longer live in fear of dying from drinking.
I'm free to go anywhere I want whenever I want at a moment's notice.
I go to bed and wake up with a good conscience and peace of mind.
I can look myself and others in the eye.
I no longer carry guilt and shame on my back.
I started a new and challenging job a year ago that keeps me very, very busy.
I relax and smell the roses when I have down time.
I live and enjoy and cope with the ups and downs of life like non-drinkers do.
I spend time being grateful for where I am.
I don't drink and that helps me to be a better person.

Here's what I did to get sober:

I followed the supplement and diet plans outlined in the MWO book.
I worked BIG time on my junkie thinking and relationship with alcohol.
I started each day with non-drinking affirmations and repeated them throughout the day.
I stopped BSing myself about my drinking.
I adopted a zero tolerance policy for myself, no ifs, ands or buts.
I stopped talking about and viewing alcohol like a friend and something I need in my life.
I started talking about alcohol and viewing it as the enemy that it is.
I stopped letting myself off the hook for my drinking.
I started holding myself accountable for my actions.
I stopped viewing sobriety as a scary venture.
I educated myself about the disease.
I visited the MWO, Spiritual River, and Women for Sobriety websites.
I adopted a new internal dialogue and set of rules for myself:

It's not OK for me to drink 5 drinks instead of 10, or lite beer instead of regular, or wine instead of vodka. Alcohol is alcohol is alcohol, period, and if I?m allowing myself to drink alcohol, I?m not committed to being sober.

It's not OK to have alcohol in the house or hang out in bars when I know damn well that those things are triggers for me to drink.

It's not OK to make excuses why I need or deserve to drink (I?m bored, stressed, happy, sad, etc.). That's just a bunch of BS! In realitiy, alcohol makes us feel more stressed, ruins our feelings of happiness, makes us feel more depressed, and there's really nothing more boring than a drunk who has no goals in life other than drinking to get drunk and wishing they didn't.

It's not OK to justify my drinking by telling myself that I haven't killed anyone yet, and quite frankly, I?m damn lucky I never did!

It?s not OK for me to blame other people for judging me or thinking poorly of me when I drink like a fish and act like a drunken fool. Seriously, what do we expect people to think when we present ourselves that way?

It?s not OK to listen to people who tell me I don?t have a problem when I know damn well that I do.

It's not OK for me to whine "poor pitiful me" because I can't drink. There are much worse things in life.

It?s not OK for me to just forget about my drunken escapades like they didn?t happen, because they did happen, and I should feel guilty and shameful when I do things I know I shouldn?t be doing.

It's not OK to drink like fish, it's really NOT, and until we start telling ourselves it's not OK, well, we're likely to continue drinking like a fish.

Here's how I stay sober:

All of the above.
I remember from whence I came and how horrible my life was.
I remind myself every day how lucky I am to be sober.

Sheri

Sheri,

FANTASTIC post.......this should be in the toolbox....Can you copy and paste??

Superb. Thank you x:l

[mario]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

That says it all sheri, thank you.

[Queenbug]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

'I also visualize in my mind how the evening will go: I buy the bottle, I have the first glass and get that warm feeling all over and want it to continue so I have another glass. Now I'm getting a little tipsy and I like it so here goes glass 3. I feel so good, WTF, might as well have glass 4 and then I fast forward to the next morning and the empty bottle on the counter ( a large bottle, not the 4 glass size). See, I can NEVER visualize myself having just one or two glasses (except if I'm out at dinner somewhere-wierd). I just can't no matter how hard I try.'

Mamapop - that's me!! :new:

[Guitarista]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Nice one Sheri. :h

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

THANK YOU ALL so much! You have given me much to read and think about, I appreciate the advice and support. I dont know why this has been so hard for me. Well, actually I have a few ideas. My LIFESTYLE has not really changed much, so therefore, when nothing changes, nothing changes. Unless I change my lifestyle and my thinking, I think its just too hard for me to fall back into old ways of thinking and patterns. I have to break out of the mold Im in, if I want real and lasting change. Of course, Mr. Antabuse is available too. Was hoping that I would not have to go that route, but so be it. Now that would definately throw some change into my life.

[Mrs Donovan]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Thank you for this thread Overit! It's been really interesting reading and something I have really been thinking about

[dancelot]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Sheri - Great post! Thanks for sharing.

Overit - As overwhelming as quitting seems (before we've done it), in hindsight it was easy compared to the work that comes after (I'd never considered that part before!). Without doing the work, we are almost guaranteed to go back to our old ways, maybe not today or next week, but sometime. The good news is, when you do the work day by day, things do change. I use the same baby steps principle I did to get through a day at a time before, just apply it to new habits, positive behaviors, etc, instead.

There's an AA saying about spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection. For me that means break it down to what you can do now, whether it's spiritual or just a lifestyle change. Any baby step of progress is still a step forward, and they always add up. It also keeps any perfectionist tendencies at bay (always a self sabotage for me).

As others have said, new behaviors eventually become habits, and it does get easier.

There's another AA saying - be willing to whatever it takes. The payoff is so worth it. Good luck on your journey and take care! :h

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

GREAT words of wisdom, thanks Dancealot! I totally get what your saying, now just to apply it to MY life. I think thats the REAL trick.

[Guest]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

I ask for help and constantly assess how I'm feeling each day. Dealing with all the stupid thoughts and insecurities that can pop-up in my head is also something I do constantly as I know they are the ones I will drink on.

This weekend I felt I was under a grey cloud and knew I had to do something about it. I don't use AA but knew that there would be a meeting somewhere near. Spoke to someone who I know is a regular AA goer, he said I should share at the meeting - just say why I was there. Well I did and I was encouraged to speak about my drinking and how it was at the end. It was very scary(sharing as well as remembering) but tell you what the cloud started to lift - not immediately but by the next day my thoughts were definitely clearer and today I feel a lot better. Got home to some great news too, something I'd hoped for has happened and it's only been possible by me not drinking.

That's working at sobriety.

[OverIt2007]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Happy to hear of your good news! I know, unless we do the work, the good things, the blessings will not come our way. I get that.

[Guest]

How do you work on your Sobriety?

Yes, at the time it was really inconvenient and it meant arriving late to an event I had a ticket for. The risk of drinking was far more important than that and I was even prepared to miss out completely if I had to.