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    #1

    crap sticks

    darn it. there you go.

    broke a 45 day AF stint at a family bbq.

    This AF life shit is so much harder than I thought.

    I can happily stay AF alone in my own home - but my first test, a test that felt fairly safe i.e a family bbq, after all this time - well, needless to say - I'd best grow a long beard and become a hermit because I don't think I can be around people drinking alcohol in such a relaxed, non problematic fashion in the sun like they were today.

    :upset:
    AF since Sunday 27th June 2010
    One Day At A Time

    Trying to be the best mother, daughter and friend that I can be.
    Tags: None
    #2
    crap sticks

    Mrs Donovan;895770 wrote: darn it. there you go.

    broke a 45 day AF stint at a family bbq.

    This AF life shit is so much harder than I thought.

    I can happily stay AF alone in my own home - but my first test, a test that felt fairly safe i.e a family bbq, after all this time - well, needless to say - I'd best grow a long beard and become a hermit because I don't think I can be around people drinking alcohol in such a relaxed, non problematic fashion in the sun like they were today.

    :upset:
    Mrs D pick yourself back up and get back in the race. I failed at my first social after being AF for several months. Now I'm AF again and have been to many events and am able to handle it without drinking. so have another go and just try and learn from the bbq! You with me?
    Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

    Comment

      #3
      crap sticks

      Well, crap sticks is right. I saw the title of your thread and immediately thought "Crap, she drank at the BBQ" . I almost said something about it yesterday & now wish I had. What's done is done. Onward and upward! What you need to do NOW is recognize your limits, weaknesses, triggers and know what to do differently next time. You don't want to say home forever, you know.

      You can.... (besides not go, which is certainly a good idea if you are concerned)

      Make sure you take your own AF drinks you really like
      Have an early exit plan if needed
      Eat before you go so you're not too hungry

      Toolbox sort of things.

      Learn from this and move forward, right?
      sigpic
      Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

      Comment

        #4
        crap sticks

        I hear ya! That is my problem sometimes too, as I bartend and its like hmmm, gee, why cant I too? Its scary how complacent we can be. Maybe we should tattoo the word alcoholic on us somewhere to remind us!
        I LOVE MY SEROTONIN AND BOOZE SCREWS IT UP!!!!!

        Comment

          #5
          crap sticks

          You know, as long as you learned from it then it is a positive thing!!!

          You are winning Mrs D, like Techie and Greenie say xx
          sigpicXXX

          Comment

            #6
            crap sticks

            Back in the race Mrs. D! It will get easier. Work on the thinking.....

            'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

            Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

            Comment

              #7
              crap sticks

              It's a process. DOn't dwell on the slip up, learn form it and move forward.
              While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.
              Benjamin Franklin

              Comment

                #8
                crap sticks

                It's only one day. 'Even Homer nods'...forget about it.

                Comment

                  #9
                  crap sticks

                  thanks everyone. thanks so much for your really kind understanding words. really appreciate it. Had to log straight on here this morning.

                  I feel like death. I've been awake since about 4 or 5 being sick, I'm horribly dehydrated and have the most splitting headache I have ever had. I can't deal with my children. I'm walking around hunched over like an old woman because to stand up straight would mean I will probably vomit again. I don't know if I can take my daily antidepressant. I'm going to have to go back to bed.

                  Sorry - I'm just listing these things so that I can come back and read them if I ever think that drinking is a good idea again.

                  As it says in JohnnyH's 15 list - 1 drink equals a drunk and that's certainly what happened yesterday. I didn't even enjoy myself so all of this wasn't worth it anyway.
                  :upset:
                  AF since Sunday 27th June 2010
                  One Day At A Time

                  Trying to be the best mother, daughter and friend that I can be.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    crap sticks

                    Greeneyes looking at your list I realise I didn't do any of those things and maybe that would have helped.

                    I didn't eat before going and was totally starving. I didn't have my sort of drinks that I like with me and no exit plan.

                    Even my parents can see I have a problem even though they drink like fish themselves.

                    Maybe I'm not weak. maybe I just didn't plan ahead and that is the key. Lesson learnt - onwards and upwards!

                    Right - i'm off to back to bed on this beautiful sunny morning while my parents take my children out for a day of fun without me.
                    AF since Sunday 27th June 2010
                    One Day At A Time

                    Trying to be the best mother, daughter and friend that I can be.

                    Comment

                      #11
                      crap sticks

                      Well done mrs donovan ,that's the attitude, you didn't become an alcoholic/problem drinker overnight and you wont stop overnight,But having a good positive attitude towards yourself will certainly help,onwards & upwards :-)


                      :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                      Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                      I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                      This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        crap sticks

                        Thanks Mario that's really kind of you to say so
                        AF since Sunday 27th June 2010
                        One Day At A Time

                        Trying to be the best mother, daughter and friend that I can be.

                        Comment

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