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    #46
    girly's progress

    girly wirly;902329 wrote: having a huge anxiety attack this morning. my heads racing again with a million jobs that seem like life or death.... i hate this shit.....

    do ironing, do washing, tidy, clean and declutter the whole house , diet today, go diet food shopping. tidy the garden, go and pick the car up.... etc
    Stop and take some deep breaths. Then look at what absolutely must be done and leave the rest for another time when you feel more able to cope. You can't declutter a whole house in one day. No one can. Work on it a room at a time, even a corner of a room at a time. Otherwise you set yourself up for anxiety and feeling overwhelmed. The only job that's life or death is getting a healthy meal on the table and that could even be takeout. Stop and give yourself time to breathe and relax a bit. Don't set yourself up for a letdown and feeling bad that you didn't accomplish what you set out to do. If you have to go shopping for food, go. Maybe you can order on-line from a local supermarket and save yourself the trip. If you have a Tesco near you, I think you can do that. The garden can wait til tomorrow. It will still be there. Is there anyone there who can help you, like your husband or a friend? Just don't load so many things on you. And don't pressure yourself... easy does it....
    For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
    AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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      #47
      girly's progress

      Girly,

      Just to echo what's already been said, deep breaths are the way to deal with anxiety. Sit down some where quiet, an really focus on your breathing. Set yourself the challenge of breathing as gently as you can and then stay there for as long as you feel you need to. It is the simplest of techniques but is very effective.

      I hope you have a nice sober day Girly, you really deserve it.
      "The greatest hazard of all, losing one?s self, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all. No other loss can occur so quietly; any other loss - an arm, a leg, five dollars, a wife, etc. - is sure to be noticed." Soren Kierkegaard.

      AF since 13 June 2010.

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        #48
        girly's progress

        morning all. thanks for the advice. took most of it on board until another big anxiety attack at 7pm where i did the washing, some ironing (i only allowed myself to iron 10 things), cooked hubby's packed lunch for today, then scrubbed the kitchen. i sat down at 10 pm because my hubby told me to, but i was still wired to do more! so i practiced the slow breathing to wind down.

        i have made myself a rota for jobs and the housework with three or four tasks on each day tasks on each day to stop me panicking. they have clean one room. declutter one cupboard and a few items of ironing each day, then one small job from a list like... make dental appointments, ring doctors, fill certain forms in. etc. by the end of the week i should have made some headway and hopefully keep the attacks at bay.

        no alcohol yesterday and none today. xx
        The mind will intellectualize it, the heart will emotionalize it, yet the gut never lies.

        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9/girly-wirly-s-toolbox-2-45452.html

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          #49
          girly's progress

          Girly that is great positive steps xxx
          Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.

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            #50
            girly's progress

            Girly

            I think I've mentioned previously that I was so like you when I was on-off drinking. Would rush around like a mad woman, long list, lots of pressure, had real big panics and then flip my lid. I found I had to stop doing this to get and keep sober. There is a chicken and egg thing to this as I'm pretty sure the after effects of AL causes the panics, then you get stressed and tired and want to drink again. I found I had to simply put tasks aside and accept what I was doing now. It's hard work sometimes but it's made a difference. I'm a lot calmer now and acheive an awful lot more. Plus I'm sober.

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              #51
              girly's progress

              Girly, I can sense a real determination in your last thread. I've just signed on to try and get into a positive mood as I have felt very exposed to negative feelings today. I caught myself thinkng, 'so what if I drink, what's going to change anyway' and I was starting to get angry for no good reason. Your last post has made me feel much better, and I am going to do a rota of things I need to get done too. Since I've stopped drinking, lots of other stuff is not getting done and it's getting me down, I need to address this.

              Thanks for the inspiration Girly
              "The greatest hazard of all, losing one?s self, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all. No other loss can occur so quietly; any other loss - an arm, a leg, five dollars, a wife, etc. - is sure to be noticed." Soren Kierkegaard.

              AF since 13 June 2010.

              Comment

                #52
                girly's progress

                Morning Girly, I agree with UKB (yet again!) I was wired to the moon when I was on-off drinking, my head was all over the place. Very quickly that levels out when you dump the booze, I'd say as quickly as a week or two AF I started to level out, practically horizontal these days could veg. on the couch all day if I let myself!!! I think on-off drinking is very detrimental both physically and mentally.
                I was wondering where you were UKB, missed your voice of reason!
                Molly
                Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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                  #53
                  girly's progress

                  Johnny;903143 wrote: Girly, I can sense a real determination in your last thread. I've just signed on to try and get into a positive mood as I have felt very exposed to negative feelings today. I caught myself thinkng, 'so what if I drink, what's going to change anyway' and I was starting to get angry for no good reason. Your last post has made me feel much better, and I am going to do a rota of things I need to get done too. Since I've stopped drinking, lots of other stuff is not getting done and it's getting me down, I need to address this.

                  Thanks for the inspiration Girly
                  good johnny! :l

                  thanks ukb and molly, wise words as always that i fully agree with, especially the chicken egg thing.... drink to calm anxiety depression...... have anxiety, depression and hangover because i drank.... drink to calm anxiety depression...

                  i did the four things on my list, then once i started i couldn't stop , i did much more than planned... don't know if thats a good or bad thing? should stay calm but my downstairs rooms are gleaming! lol
                  The mind will intellectualize it, the heart will emotionalize it, yet the gut never lies.

                  https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9/girly-wirly-s-toolbox-2-45452.html

                  Comment

                    #54
                    girly's progress

                    GW, as everyone else has said, it's the blessed calmness that eventually comes that makes it all worthwhile. I NEVER could have survived last week, with as many as 10 children here at a time, if I had been drinking, or yo-yo drinking. I was not allowed to have the kids alone for a while, so this is truly a great accomplishment. Congratulations on your progress!!!
                    sigpic
                    Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                    awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

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                      #55
                      girly's progress

                      girly wirly;903345 wrote: good johnny! :l

                      thanks ukb and molly, wise words as always that i fully agree with, especially the chicken egg thing.... drink to calm anxiety depression...... have anxiety, depression and hangover because i drank.... drink to calm anxiety depression...

                      i did the four things on my list, then once i started i couldn't stop , i did much more than planned... don't know if thats a good or bad thing? should stay calm but my downstairs rooms are gleaming! lol
                      you sound like you're in a much better place today girly. that whole drinking anxiety/depression cycle that molly & ukb mentioned was me too. that's what I was going through. I do take an AD. The binge drinking pattern I engaged in never allowed the med to work until now. I wish you the best GW :h
                      Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

                      Comment

                        #56
                        girly's progress

                        techie;903352 wrote: you sound like you're in a much better place today girly. that whole drinking anxiety/depression cycle that molly & ukb mentioned was me too. that's what I was going through. I do take an AD. The binge drinking pattern I engaged in never allowed the med to work until now. I wish you the best GW :h
                        thanks tech. when i think of where i was 2/3 weeks ago. 3 dangerous episodes, 2 that i was lucky to get out alive.... drinking every night.... no professional help lined up... a danger to myself. i really think if it weren't for this place i'd be a goner!

                        now i can get to day 5 no problem then binge drink at weekends, but that is huge headway compared to the above. and now i've a mental health appointment on weds for self harm/ panic attacks/ anxiety depression. then i've had my appt through to start an alcohol programme on the 22nd jul. huge improvement. lets hope with the right therapy/ programme i can get over the next hurdle.

                        thankyou gang for your support!:l
                        The mind will intellectualize it, the heart will emotionalize it, yet the gut never lies.

                        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9/girly-wirly-s-toolbox-2-45452.html

                        Comment

                          #57
                          girly's progress

                          girly wirly;903361 wrote: thanks tech. when i think of where i was 2/3 weeks ago. 3 dangerous episodes, 2 that i was lucky to get out alive.... drinking every night.... no professional help lined up... a danger to myself. i really think if it weren't for this place i'd be a goner!

                          now i can get to day 5 no problem then binge drink at weekends, but that is huge headway compared to the above. and now i've a mental health appointment on weds for self harm/ panic attacks/ anxiety depression. then i've had my appt through to start an alcohol programme on the 22nd jul. huge improvement. lets hope with the right therapy/ programme i can get over the next hurdle.

                          thankyou gang for your support!:l
                          Hi again, Girly.

                          You're right, you are making progress compared to a couple of weeks ago.

                          Good job on making appointments with specialists to assist you in overcoming your various issues and problems.

                          I am a little confused by the wording of your post, tho'. Now that you know you can do 5 days AF, do you mean that you are giving yourself permission to binge over the weekends? That you "deserve" to have a few drinks because you've managed 5 days AF? When you know that those few drinks will probably lead to more and could seriously put your health in danger if you're on medications. If you can go 5 days AF, surely you can get through the weekend using the same tools you do during the week. If you are already planning to binge on the weekend, I ask you to reconsider. There is a great post by Sheri called "JUNKIE THINKING" in the "Just Starting Out" forum. Please read it, print it out and read it again.

                          Wishing you all the best,

                          Stirly...
                          For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
                          AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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                            #58
                            girly's progress

                            Hi Girly, I will ditto what Stirly says. I too am a bit confused as to your goals especially having had those close encounters while on medications too.

                            I wish you nothing but the best for your health and life. xox

                            Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible and suddenly you are doing the impossible.


                            St. Francis of Assisi

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                              #59
                              girly's progress

                              what i meant was, i've come so far in the last two weeks. i'm not giving myself permission to drink. this friday i'll be using the tools to help me, but, i'm forgiving myself for drinking last weekend. i am very early on in this journey and still have large mountains to climb. i have to be gentle on myself after recent events and when i read my posts from three weeks back they are terrifying. i've achieved sooo much in a short space of time. seeking help was a huge step for me. rome wasn't built in a day after all folks... but i know with a calm mind, professional help and you guys... i'll make it. i have to praise myself for these last few weeks xxx

                              i'll read that post on junkie thinking stirls.. every little helps!:l:h
                              The mind will intellectualize it, the heart will emotionalize it, yet the gut never lies.

                              https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9/girly-wirly-s-toolbox-2-45452.html

                              Comment

                                #60
                                girly's progress

                                You have come a long way. It's just that the way your post was worded, it sounded like you were already planning on a weekend binge. :goodjob: Good for you. Keep it up. :huggy
                                For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
                                AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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